how can i make friends when i am extremely ugly

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white_as_snow
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14 May 2018, 2:42 pm

nobody wants to hang out with a guy who is extremly ugly. it drags down their social status. people would feel ashamed to be seen with me.

sure, having a good inside matters, but if you are really ugly like me people dont really care how good your inside is because my outside is really ugly.

people accept guys who just ugly or average but extremly ugly guys like do not get accepted .

women dont want an extremly ugly guy as a friend and neither do guys .



Kiprobalhato
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14 May 2018, 2:43 pm

answer: make less posts about how ugly you think you are.


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banana247
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14 May 2018, 3:40 pm

Kiprobalhato wrote:
answer: make less posts about how ugly you think you are.


I think there's definitely something to that... but why? Because low confidence and self-deprecating remarks are pretty much never considered attractive by anyone. Friends who are very needy, depressed, or requiring constant validation and coddling are really exhausting to most people.

Good friends will be willing to accommodate a little neediness, and especially in times of crisis, but most just can't handle that weight ALL the time. (That's why it's healthy to confide in several different people instead of just one, and also why having a therapist can really help.) Even if you were extremely "sexy", "handsome", "attractive", etc, low self confidence would cause you to still doubt everything, and people who are physically attracted to you would drop off quickly once they feel the weight of your self-worth.

I feel like firstly, we (you) should know what you think is ugly about yourself, and why. This is going to get blunt but... Are you talking about your face, or your whole body in general? Is it related to illness, medical condition, birthmark, deformity? Is there some specific defining feature about your body, or do you just think think you're unattractive in general?

There are some things that can possibly be adjusted with effort or money, such as hair, weight, complexion, clothes that flatter your body best... sometimes these or other things can't (or shouldn't) be messed with. Regardless, the confidence thing is going to be a hinderance no matter what.

I think you have to find positive things about yourself, and if you can't, then figure out some positive things that you wish you had and try to make those happen. Working towards a goal can be distracting and help to not feel so down, and even small progress can be encouraging. I know, easier SAID than DONE, but self reflection and the decision to try to make a change is the first step.



white_as_snow
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14 May 2018, 4:08 pm

Kiprobalhato wrote:
answer: make less posts about how ugly you think you are.


how does not making this thread make me not ugly? wtf.

i dont think, i know, its a objective truth that i am brutally ugly. everyone tells me that i am VERY ugly.



white_as_snow
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14 May 2018, 4:11 pm

banana247 wrote:
Kiprobalhato wrote:
answer: make less posts about how ugly you think you are.


I think there's definitely something to that... but why? Because low confidence and self-deprecating remarks are pretty much never considered attractive by anyone. Friends who are very needy, depressed, or requiring constant validation and coddling are really exhausting to most people.

Good friends will be willing to accommodate a little neediness, and especially in times of crisis, but most just can't handle that weight ALL the time. (That's why it's healthy to confide in several different people instead of just one, and also why having a therapist can really help.) Even if you were extremely "sexy", "handsome", "attractive", etc, low self confidence would cause you to still doubt everything, and people who are physically attracted to you would drop off quickly once they feel the weight of your self-worth.

I feel like firstly, we (you) should know what you think is ugly about yourself, and why. This is going to get blunt but... Are you talking about your face, or your whole body in general? Is it related to illness, medical condition, birthmark, deformity? Is there some specific defining feature about your body, or do you just think think you're unattractive in general?

There are some things that can possibly be adjusted with effort or money, such as hair, weight, complexion, clothes that flatter your body best... sometimes these or other things can't (or shouldn't) be messed with. Regardless, the confidence thing is going to be a hinderance no matter what.

I think you have to find positive things about yourself, and if you can't, then figure out some positive things that you wish you had and try to make those happen. Working towards a goal can be distracting and help to not feel so down, and even small progress can be encouraging. I know, easier SAID than DONE, but self reflection and the decision to try to make a change is the first step.



hmmm what, i dont talk about how ugly i am, its just in threads like this , i am venting my frustation right now.

i am one of the most ugly guys on earth and there is nothing i can do about it, there is no hope so stop sending some.



SaveFerris
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14 May 2018, 6:46 pm

white_as_snow wrote:
there is no hope so stop sending some.


WTF , don't bother making threads that are questions if you don't want answers , you are just going to push people away and these are people who haven't seen how ugly you think you look.


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nick007
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15 May 2018, 3:06 am

You could try to make friends with blind people. Looks won't be a factor sense they cant see & they probably have a harder time making friends than the average person.


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yellowtamarin
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15 May 2018, 3:22 am

I think that you should vent to a personal journal rather than posting questions here then telling us not to answer them.



white_as_snow
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15 May 2018, 3:40 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
I think that you should vent to a personal journal rather than posting questions here then telling us not to answer them.


hmm no, i want answers.

why would anyone want a friend who is really ugly?



yellowtamarin
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15 May 2018, 3:45 am

white_as_snow wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
I think that you should vent to a personal journal rather than posting questions here then telling us not to answer them.

hmm no, i want answers.
why would anyone want a friend who is really ugly?

I don't know, that sounds strange to want an ugly friend. I personally don't care what my friends look like. They can be "ugly", but I don't seek them out for that reason.



white_as_snow
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15 May 2018, 3:47 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
white_as_snow wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
I think that you should vent to a personal journal rather than posting questions here then telling us not to answer them.

hmm no, i want answers.
why would anyone want a friend who is really ugly?

I don't know, that sounds strange to want an ugly friend. I personally don't care what my friends look like. They can be "ugly", but I don't seek them out for that reason.


but you would not want to be friend with a guy who is very ugly.



yellowtamarin
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15 May 2018, 3:50 am

white_as_snow wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
white_as_snow wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
I think that you should vent to a personal journal rather than posting questions here then telling us not to answer them.

hmm no, i want answers.
why would anyone want a friend who is really ugly?

I don't know, that sounds strange to want an ugly friend. I personally don't care what my friends look like. They can be "ugly", but I don't seek them out for that reason.

but you would not want to be friend with a guy who is very ugly.

I don't care what my friends look like. I just said that. It's not a factor in friendship. If I don't want to be friends with an ugly person it's because I don't like or gel with their personality.



Joe90
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15 May 2018, 3:57 am

white_as_snow wrote:
Kiprobalhato wrote:
answer: make less posts about how ugly you think you are.


how does not making this thread make me not ugly? wtf.

i dont think, i know, its a objective truth that i am brutally ugly. everyone tells me that i am VERY ugly.


Why do people call you ugly? That is cruel. Do they not think of how that would make you feel?

No wonder you have such poor self-image, if you have people in your life that call you ugly. And I bet you're not even ugly at all.


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white_as_snow
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15 May 2018, 4:15 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
white_as_snow wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
white_as_snow wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
I think that you should vent to a personal journal rather than posting questions here then telling us not to answer them.

hmm no, i want answers.
why would anyone want a friend who is really ugly?

I don't know, that sounds strange to want an ugly friend. I personally don't care what my friends look like. They can be "ugly", but I don't seek them out for that reason.

but you would not want to be friend with a guy who is very ugly.

I don't care what my friends look like. I just said that. It's not a factor in friendship. If I don't want to be friends with an ugly person it's because I don't like or gel with their personality.


but an very ugly guy would drag down your social status. everyone would stare. your friends would ask why are you friend with such a ugly guy ewww.

i do think you care, because almost all very ugly guys are friendless. people do accept a very ugly woman as a friend, yes.



white_as_snow
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15 May 2018, 4:26 am

Joe90 wrote:
white_as_snow wrote:
Kiprobalhato wrote:
answer: make less posts about how ugly you think you are.


how does not making this thread make me not ugly? wtf.

i dont think, i know, its a objective truth that i am brutally ugly. everyone tells me that i am VERY ugly.


Why do people call you ugly? That is cruel. Do they not think of how that would make you feel?

No wonder you have such poor self-image, if you have people in your life that call you ugly. And I bet you're not even ugly at all.


because i am so ugly so they cant keep their mouth shut and its also okay to mock guys in todays socety because we have a privilege.

i feel very bad about it....i feel like i need to isolate myself from the world. people also tell me that i am very boring and that i will never get a friend/gf in my life because its not possible to like me. its against nature to like me as my sister said.

everyone calls me ugly ugly, never heard a kind word towards me.

BUT, i am actually very very ugly....so yeah, but it sucks to hear it...