We as Aspies should stop trying to make friends/relationship

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I have friends but most of them are on the spectrum, neurodiverse or have some sort of other disability. In terms of NTs I get along with them but it never adopts into an acquaintanceship.

I have a couple good friends. But I've always been positively baffled why people obsess over needing and making friends.
I don't have a love of humans anyway.

Let's not get discouraged over the notion of makings friends/relationships.

The thread in the 'In-Depth Adult-Life Discussion Forum' might offer encouragement:

'Regions Where HFA Awareness is "Ahead of the Curve."'
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[quoteS="Summer_Twilight"]I have friends but most of them are on the spectrum, neurodiverse or have some sort of other disability. In terms of NTs I get along with them but it never adopts into an acquaintanceship.[/quote] Summer: What do you mean by "acquaintanceship"? I think of that as two people knowing each other, but not being friends. So do you mean that or friendship?

Oh and as far as the thread topic goes, bs. I have some NT friends and I view the ND ones I'm making now as both opportunities to expand my social circle and as practice to making more NT friends in the future. There are plenty of NT people out there who are happy to make and keep friendships w/ND people. I'm not saying it's easy to sustain them. But it's far from impossible either and most of us have opportunities and the abilities to do so. The key is just practice practice practice with whoever. It then will likely eventually pay off.

Summer: What do you mean by "acquaintanceship"? I think of that as two people knowing each other, but not being friends. So do you mean that or friendship?

Oh and as far as the thread topic goes, bs. I have some NT friends and I view the ND ones I'm making now as both opportunities to expand my social circle and as practice to making more NT friends in the future. There are plenty of NT people out there who are happy to make and keep friendships w/ND people. I'm not saying it's easy to sustain them. But it's far from impossible either and most of us have opportunities and the abilities to do so. The key is just practice practice practice with whoever. It then will likely eventually pay off.[/quote]

Thank you for sharing you experiences. Twitter has acknowledged WrongPlanet #wrongplanet - A hashtag on encouraging AS/NT relationships #ASNT

Every issue has two sides. With that being said:

We as Aspies should refrain from these negative attitudes too easily becoming self-fulfilling (or self-defeatist) prophecies!

My son who has autism and is ten years old has a hard time making and keeping friends. He wants to make friends and socialize but just has difficulty relating to most kids. They aren't knocking on his door and inviting him to parties which is hard to witness as a parent. He pushes us to call on his behalf for social events and it is heartbreaking that he hears "no" so often. I know of others with autism who are ok with little social contact and wish that were him. Yet, there parents worry about constant solitude they may face as they become adults. Constant rejection is hard. Loneliness may be worse.

We are working with a therapist to improve social skills but am concerned that he just will never connect. I am hoping that he can improve but also gets more comfortable with his struggles. I would like to know from the forum if anyone has had constant improvements over time or is life with Autism or just a adapting to being alone?

WrongPlanet has a 'Parents Discussion' Forum.

I was once that kid who didn't want to have friends/playmates; hence rejection was well.....expected, and even understood.

To answer your question on later-life issues: I've been encouraged to build on those strengths of small talk in order to address my weaknesses of actually having friendships. As an adult, this wisdom has resonated personally. On small-talk, I've found it beneficial (to a point) to interact with friendly/thoughtful people i.e., my experiences are with small-talk with university-aged students who staff these awesome eateries / coffeehouses. My best experinces with interaction have come from interacting with awesome relatives, and family friends.

I've also had experiences on outings with counselors, and even outings that my therapist, and her colleagues organized. I was told by my therapist that I only interact with the only familiar people I knew and trusted...therapists, and counselors. The other people in these groups (for whatever reasons) didn't pique my interests.

So anyways, in a nutshell, building friendships with new people (as people I've had experience with small-talk are of different generations AND/OR different values).

Here on WrongPlanet(WP), my last few discussions are encouraging rather novel approaches (very promising approaches) to building friendships for adults with Aspergers; that is building friendships with NTs who have some professional and personal understandings with Aspergers; that is such people who are terrific people and professionals alike. I'm disapointed that I've received no responses from like-minded WP members! Why??

In closing, when my generation was growing-up, there was little to no awareness of the Autism Spectrum beyond classic Autism. I'm hopeful for today's generation growing-up, as we are now aware of the Autism Spectrum, and have resources such as WP - awareness to further boost progress and develop best practices.

mkp6019: WP has listed your location as Hartford, CT. I've been advocating the Autism/Aspergers NEtwork (AANE) in the Boston Region for helping adults with Aspergers here on WP. Are you familiar with AANE?