is it difficult for you to "let go" of negative experiences?

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Seeking and obtaining redress is what gives a survivor legitimated social standing. This is why we have courts.

In more primitive times, people obtained redress in more direct ways.

If you are not even trying to hold major perpetrators accountable, then you have accepted the idea that you don't deserve to have your social and civil standing restored, but rather you are happy to live in that very small social space which is left.

Most of what the Neurological Difference, Autism, Aspergers identifications do is exonerate any and all perpetrators.

These is nothing on this earth, not even sex, which is more exhilarating than holding a perpetrator responsible publicly.

"I have undergone some significant trauma in my life and no one has ever told me to “let it go” except for an abuser."

I agree, the one who tells you to "Let Go" is an abuser, at least a secondary one. But our society is predicated on the idea that children should be subjected to this kind of secondary abuse and should have no avenue for legal redress. In the US there is no real protection against disinheritance.

In my observation, the Born Again Christian Movement is in large measure based on preaching denial and exonerating child abusers. I am very proud to have helped to get one of its people convicted and a long prison sentence, and in all my communications to the court, the DA, and following up with local police, I have emphasized how much that guy's church is built upon child abuse.

Eventually though people have to try. And what ever may have happened to you or I in the past is still being done to someone, in some form today.

Denial is never a good long term strategy. The idea that you can deploy it and not suffer severe life consequences is a malicious lie.

We who are survivors need to make our own institutions, and not for Recovery and Therapy, for Redress.

If we protect ourselves and others, then we will be respected. Otherwise we will continue to be objects of scorn, contempt, and pity, and most of the Autism / Aspergers activism is just pity seeking.

I helped three girls put their father in the state penn.

If they had gone for denial instead, listening to their church, then their lives would have severely suffered as a result.

You may not want to out stuff publicly. I am very private in my affairs. But if you are not trying to seek and obtain redress, then you are saying that the abuse is okay, and you are saying that to the children of today, watching them suffer the same kinds of abuse which others have suffered.

The best is to come out when you have punished some current perpetrators.

But denial is never a good option, it means living a life of shame. It means enabling new abusers.

It is very unfortunate that the administration of 'services' gets tied to the acceptance of disability labels. People should not have to accept these labels. Rather, the needs of everyone should be met, and their unique characteristics taken into consideration.

Autism / Aspergers is almost entirely a sociological construction. Could not even exist if we did not send children into school environments, and if the middle-class family did not use children to give legitimacy to the adults. In more primitive societies, there is no such thing as Autism.

The right which really matters is the right to be treated like a human being. Autism activism does not obtain this, it only obtains pity.

Constructing Autism: Unravelling the 'Truth' and Understanding the Social 1st Edition
Majia Holmer Nadesan

More than anything else, the concept of Autism / Aspergers / Neurological Difference is just and excuse for abusing children and adults.

Most all of it is the creation of parents, teachers, fellow employees, school children, and doctors.

I read the writings of the popular Autism advocates, they tell me all the things which those supposedly with Autism cannot do. And by their own writings and the things which they talk about, they prove to me that what they say is NOT TRUE AT ALL.

Living by denial is never a good strategy. It amounts to being an Uncle Tom.

It was by fate that I was handed the chance to get involved in the Pentecostal Molester Case. He was jumping up and down getting all emotional blaming it all on his eldest daughter, scapegoating her.

But I stand with the child. So I only needed to see that performance ONCE. As I kept explaining to the DA and the Court, he never told me anything which directly indicated guilt, I saw the huge emotional investment he had in scapegoating his eldest daugther.

So I got the case file, read the police report, and a read a largely autobiographical book he had published. I read it more carefully than the DA did.

No, not everything is going to be like this. I saw the whole affair as The Burning Bush. One does not ignore such. I know that because I acted, more opportunities will be opened for me, like opportunity to redress things which are more personal and more directly affect me.

But if I had taken a Live and Let Live denial approach, then I would have done nothing.

As it was, I got a huge education, listening to the daughters testisfy, and seeing how still it was very hard to get a conviction.

Many child molestation cases end in hung juries. I had not known this.

Most all of the things being called Autism, are also true of most other people some of the time.

People do though have different temperaments.

And now you are attacking me, attacking the propriety of my being here, when I REJECT DISABILITY LABELS.

Well, I do identify with the personal experiences of those who claim themselves to be Autistic. I am sure that if I wanted pity, I could be diagnosed as such.

But I would never do this.

Most of what is called Autism is socially constructed, as well as being the results of abuse.

People grow and become more flexible in positive environments. If therapies do any good, its because it puts the child out of range of the hatred coming from the parents.

We need to make out own institutions and build them around something other than disability or difference labels.

For a while, long ago, I had an autistic girlfriend. She was just like everyone else, no defect, no deficiency. But she was locked up in this special residential treatment facility.

She did not need to be in there, except perhaps for protection from abusers, most often her parents.

No tight clothes, makeup, bombshell hair. So she would not have lasted long in adolescent girl culture.

But there was nothing wrong with her, no reason anyone should have convinced her that such labels were for her benefit, instead of for the benefit of abusers.

She is not attacking you being here.

She's just wondering why you're on an autism site---if you don't believe in "autism."

Autism is real. It is a Spectrum. There are some autistic people who are not even aware of themselves. Then there are some who are absolute geniuses.

The concept of "autism" is not meant to enable abusers. That's dead wrong.

It's noble that you want to put child molesters away. And your persistence is laudable.

But what you say about "secondary rapists" and all that----really isn't true.

You have some good ideas, and some erroneous ones, in my opinion.