RE: ASpie male advise - complete turn around

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Joined: 29 Jun 2018
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 12
Location: Staines

09 Jul 2018, 3:54 pm

So I have dated my Aspie for 16 months, he was full on with texts, calls etc full on told me he loves me after a month. Now the last few months his the complete opposite I still hear from him daily with calls etc. His coming off Citralopram at the moment is this normal for the I love you’d and miss yours to stop. Just seems there has been a complete turn around almost like his stopped bothering so much should I be worried or is this normal ?


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Joined: 4 May 2010
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 23,819
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in the police state called USA

10 Jul 2018, 9:16 am

I think this is pretty common for some Aspies. After a while & things get series they figure their partner knows how they feel cuz they used to tell em by words & the Aspies would rather show by other actions.
Not all Aspies are like this thou. I've been with my girlfriend for over 6 years & have been living together over 5 & a half & I'm still very affectionate including verbally with her.

"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"

~King Of The Hill


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Joined: 28 Jun 2018
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 451
Location: USA

10 Jul 2018, 4:11 pm

Isn't this what some people call "the honeymoon effect"? Like Nick said, I've seen blogs and articles claiming that this is particularly common among Aspies, but I think it's actually common among NTs just as much. The fact of the matter is that you can't expect the pace of the beginning of a relationship to always last forever. It doesn't necessarily mean that his feelings have changed (although that's possible too), but you might have to readjust your expectations. Ask yourself whether you need that level of intensity? I can definitely see how an Aspie might front-load a relationship to the point of obsessiveness, but it's hard to maintain.

After years of self-imposed exile. I am now making an effort to talk to people. So anyone feel free to PM me on any subject, I would love to try to interact with people more!