Braless. Need to know if I am in the wrong please?

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Esmerelda Weatherwax
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25 Aug 2018, 8:54 pm

Hurrah for camisoles, they got me through my last job (all 20 years of it)!


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IsabellaLinton
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25 Aug 2018, 9:03 pm

I couldn't tell you the last time I wore a bra to walk my dog. I just don't. Thumbs up for camis, like Esme, or just loose jumpers and tops.


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IsabellaLinton
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25 Aug 2018, 9:09 pm



I thought this was "fitting". 8) No pun intended. It's Claire Fisher's Pantyhose song, classic Six Feet Under, HBO.

I'm sure it can apply to bras as well. :heart:


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Ms.Berg
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26 Aug 2018, 5:02 am

In my opinion you are not in the wrong at all! It is your own choice to make.

I usually don`t wear bras. It is because I can`t handle to have anything around my chest and aslo straps over my shoulders bothers me. The sensation wears me out. The solution, which I personally find myself completely fine with, is to go braless and save the bra for moments I feel I need one.

And why shouldn`t you and I and everyone use bras in ways that suit our own personal preferences and needs?! If other women feel more comfortable and happy with a bra it is completely their business no matter if I prefer it differently, so why not the other way around?

Never have I experienced any negative reactions or noticed that anyone have noticed even. Also I haven`t thought about this in this way until I read your post. If not wearing a bra should make me detestable(or silly or put me in some sort of danger) I really just feel even better abut choosing a discrete life :wink:
But really, I feel this is up to everyone to decide for themselves and take care of for them selves. If anything, be curious why your family reacts the way they do, because it is their behavior that needs an explanation in my opinion(and from what you write it sounds as if they should offer you an apologize). Understanding why they behave the way they do from a sociological perspective may free you from the feeling that you are in the wrong? I am just thinking out load here...The sociological outlook helped me on many issues back when I was younger.

I really don`t like harsh social control when it comes to completely harmless, personal things.
Anyway you have my support! :D



Temeraire
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26 Aug 2018, 6:41 am

Bras get on my nerves too.

I cover the offending area with a loose shirt over a vest/t-shirt or wear a sleeveless cardigan/waistcoat.

I go for lightweight clothes to cover the fact that I am braless but as soon as I get home the shirt is off and the vest/t-shirt is enough for me to bear especially in summer.

In winter it is a lot easier as layers easily conceal my beautiful bazookas.

I have had comments in the past about not wearing a bra, from friends, but they all go told where to go as politely as I could manage.

This is my life and I live it as I please without harming anyone else. :D



BeaArthur
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26 Aug 2018, 10:26 am

My feeling is, this is a personal choice but each person should be aware that their choice may offend others. I choose not to offend most of the time. So most of the time, I do wear a bra when leaving the house (besides it makes my figure look better). This is the same reason I shave my legs before I go to the pool.

I'm not saying that's wrong or right. It's a choice. I don't expect others to have my same choice.

A reasonable compromise might be to wear clothing that is somewhat concealing. Perhaps a woven loose shirt instead of a tight knit.


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MaxE
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26 Aug 2018, 11:01 am

As a man who began to date seriously in 1973, until 1985 when I got married (to the woman I'm still married to) I will offer a historical perspective, also as you chose not to post this in the Women's forum.

During the time I was dating, it was more or less a given that whether a girl/woman wore a bra depended on what sort of breasts she had. If she had large breasts, or even if they weren't necessarily "large" but hung to some extent, then she wore a bra (except for some "hippies" I suppose). I remember my first GF reading in a woman's magazine that if you could put two pencils under your breast while standing, and they stayed in place just from the weight of the breast, then you should wear a bra. My GF could hold at least 2 pencils that way and so of course she always wore one. But others of my girlfriends had very small breasts with no aspect of hanging or bouncing, whatever. None of them ever wore a bra, and I can say in all sincerity it was not due to any desire to be provocative. In general, it was not generally noticeable whether they were wearing a bra or not. The last woman I dated before meeting my wife was quite small, and I am certain she didn't wear bras although my memory is just not that clear on the subject.

What happened since, at least in the US, might have been that the 90s were a relatively prudish decade and the idea of going braless came to be seen as provocative. At the same time, it seems that manufacturers developed new sorts of bras with much lighter-weight fabric that can be worn with tank tops and other Summer outfits, so eventually all women seem to be wearing bras nowadays. Oddly my wife insists that some women go braless today but I'm not convinced or certain how she knows. In recent years though, the prudishness of the 90s seems to have diminished to some degree (although we're nowhere near returning to the permissiveness of the 70s) so it's possible that some younger women go braless now, at least when it won't be obvious to the casual observer.

I have the impression that if a woman, even with small breasts, has always worn a bra, then going without might simply be uncomfortable. Just as I have always felt very uncomfortable "going commando".

@Kayt1 if you have small breasts then I think you should be fine walking the dog braless, but this would seem to really be about your family. But although it wouldn't bother me personally, I think you should probably wear a bra if your breasts are big enough that your bralessness would be evident to a casual observer.


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Magna
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26 Aug 2018, 9:47 pm

A man talking here since this isn't in the women's section.

I don't think any woman should be offended to go braless anywhere. They're still clothed.

I think some of the toughest and most judgmental critics on a woman's appearance are other women. On the issue of going braless, there was even a Seinfeld episode on the subject. Elaine was offended that Sue Ellen Mischke went braless, but the men had no problem with it.
Image
If a woman, especially with larger breasts, were to choose to go braless and was offended that people (ie men) noticed, I think it would be naive and unreasonable to be so. Throw erect nipples into the mix and it's not the same, but similar to if a man were to walk around wearing only sweat pants on his lower half with an erection. People would notice.

Hetero men are sexually attracted to women, a woman's body, a woman's breasts.

Again, in my opinion, I think a woman should absolutely be able to go braless anywhere she'd like. Who is anyone else to restrict her from doing so? At least some people may probably notice. Above that, it would be totally improper for anyone, male or female to comment on it to the woman, stare lewdly, etc.



IsabellaLinton
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26 Aug 2018, 9:52 pm

Not to be difficult, but should size really matter? Saying that "some women" should have to wear an uncomfortable article of clothing when "some other women" shouldn't is a form a discrimination. It's like saying that women (or men, for that matter), under a certain height should have to wear uncomfortable high heels, whereas taller people shouldn't.

When all men wear jock straps on a daily basis I will wear my bra to walk the dog.


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Benjamin the Donkey
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27 Aug 2018, 5:31 am

Ask them if they don't like it, why are they looking?

Seriously, none of their business.


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hobojungle
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27 Aug 2018, 7:56 am

IsabellaLinton wrote:
When all men wear jock straps on a daily basis I will wear my bra to walk the dog.


Amen.



IsabellaLinton
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27 Aug 2018, 8:23 am

hobojungle wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
When all men wear jock straps on a daily basis I will wear my bra to walk the dog.


Amen.


Well-endowed men can fasten the jock straps around their shoulders for that extra leverage. Underwire should also be used. Enjoy, boys!


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hobojungle
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27 Aug 2018, 8:38 am

:lol:



EC6456
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27 Aug 2018, 3:09 pm

I'm not going to lie, that sounds pretty messed up. I definitely don't wear a bra while walking my dog, and I'm a DDD. It bothers me personally to go out anywhere else without one (although, if I feel like crap and want to run down the street to the dollar store, I could really care less), but I wouldn't judge anyone else if they chose not to - what does it matter? They aren't my boobs. On the weekends I tend to stick to sports bras (if I leave the house at all), and only wear real bra's to work or some other special function. In the fall/winter if I don't want to wear a bra I put a sweatshirt on, which I'm sure people can still tell, but it makes me feel more comfortable. I don't ever wear one at all at home.

Anyway, wearing bras are the social equivalent of wearing corsets to me. They offer nothing good and change with every season (and maybe some day they will go away???? *wishful thinking*)

Also, don't listen to anyone's stupidity. You do you - I can guarantee that in the long run you'll be a lot happier. :mrgreen:


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29 Aug 2018, 4:35 am

Your not wrong, but there are consequences for breaking rules. You just have to decide if it worth paying. A dirty look I don’t care about. I’m not shaming you, but often I feel like men feel like they have permission to harass me if I’m wearing something “sexy”. It up to you.



blazingstar
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05 Sep 2018, 7:11 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Not to be difficult, but should size really matter? Saying that "some women" should have to wear an uncomfortable article of clothing when "some other women" shouldn't is a form a discrimination. It's like saying that women (or men, for that matter), under a certain height should have to wear uncomfortable high heels, whereas taller people shouldn't.

When all men wear jock straps on a daily basis I will wear my bra to walk the dog.


Right on, sister! I have always hated that advice that if a pencil under your breast drops to the floor you have to wear a bra. That was Ann Landers, if I recall.
OP: you do not have to wear a bra if you don't want to. They are uncomfortable and when I have to wear one for work, it comes off the minute I am home. Torture, really.


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