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SilentJessica
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17 Oct 2018, 6:08 am

Is positivity more common in people on the spectrum than it is for NTs?

I tend to see the best in everything and everyone, and look for what is beautiful.

* When I am shown a picture of a war scene in a video game, my reaction will usually be "the flowers/sky are pretty."

* I never get mad at people when I probably should. I might blame myself if they are rude to me, thinking I probably did something to deserve it that I can learn from.

* Horror movies and games make me smile instead of making me scared and I feel grateful to be safe at home and not in the horrific situation in the movie or game. I even laugh sometimes because something that was meant to be scary wasn't scary to me.

* I smile and laugh a lot and have been very lucky to have never had depression when most people like me probably would. I feel guilty for this sometimes.

* I like to think everything happens for a reason and that everything will always be okay somehow because "there's always a way."

* In the past, I excused the behaviour of someone who took advantage of me and was creepy to me, thinking "He can't help it. He might change." I saw through it and kept waiting for things to get better, and when he left me and said I was the one who had used him, I blamed myself for everything and felt bad.

* I sometimes enjoy it when the power goes out because the darkness is different and interesting to me when there's nothing you can do about it.

* I like bad movies and songs just because they're bad and they make me laugh.

* Whenever I stay somewhere that isn't very nice, I can see it as a funny, memorable experience rather than a ruined one.


Despite all of this, I have anxiety and always think the worst about things I worry about. I make obsessive wishes to try to make sure nothing bad happens, such as "Please be a good day and don't let anything bad happen" at 12:00 AM (I watch the clock just to be able to do this).

I've been told a few times that my positivity can be annoying and that I think everything is rainbows when it isn't. I'm not diagnosed, but sometimes I wonder if these might be traits, and if they're common if they are.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 70 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

AQ: 40
RAADS-R: 149


Piobaire
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17 Oct 2018, 6:34 am

How beautiful! Please nourish, cultivate, and celebrate your positivity by sharing it with everyone you meet. For many folks, positivity doesn't come easily and someone having the compassion to share theirs is a rare and precious gift indeed.



IstominFan
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17 Oct 2018, 8:51 am

I would say I'm a generally positive person as well. I do experience genuine feelings of loss and worry, such as when a person or pet is ill or dying, but I do remember the good times as well.



CalicoMischief
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17 Oct 2018, 9:26 am

SilentJessica wrote:
Is positivity more common in people on the spectrum than it is for NTs?

I tend to see the best in everything and everyone, and look for what is beautiful.

* When I am shown a picture of a war scene in a video game, my reaction will usually be "the flowers/sky are pretty."

* I never get mad at people when I probably should. I might blame myself if they are rude to me, thinking I probably did something to deserve it that I can learn from.

* Horror movies and games make me smile instead of making me scared and I feel grateful to be safe at home and not in the horrific situation in the movie or game. I even laugh sometimes because something that was meant to be scary wasn't scary to me.

* I smile and laugh a lot and have been very lucky to have never had depression when most people like me probably would. I feel guilty for this sometimes.

* I like to think everything happens for a reason and that everything will always be okay somehow because "there's always a way."

* In the past, I excused the behaviour of someone who took advantage of me and was creepy to me, thinking "He can't help it. He might change." I saw through it and kept waiting for things to get better, and when he left me and said I was the one who had used him, I blamed myself for everything and felt bad.

* I sometimes enjoy it when the power goes out because the darkness is different and interesting to me when there's nothing you can do about it.

* I like bad movies and songs just because they're bad and they make me laugh.

* Whenever I stay somewhere that isn't very nice, I can see it as a funny, memorable experience rather than a ruined one.


Despite all of this, I have anxiety and always think the worst about things I worry about. I make obsessive wishes to try to make sure nothing bad happens, such as "Please be a good day and don't let anything bad happen" at 12:00 AM (I watch the clock just to be able to do this).

I've been told a few times that my positivity can be annoying and that I think everything is rainbows when it isn't. I'm not diagnosed, but sometimes I wonder if these might be traits, and if they're common if they are.


This is a great post.

I think that autistic people are *naturally* very loving, empathic, positivity seeking people, but only if they are in a supportive environment that allows them to be themselves and have all of their personal needs met. When that doesn't happen, you have a lot of angry, bitter, sarcastic autistic people who can't stand NT people (like me). I am naturally a very loving, passive person. But I do not live in the kind of environment that allows me to be myself.



SilentJessica
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17 Oct 2018, 11:11 am

Piobaire wrote:
How beautiful! Please nourish, cultivate, and celebrate your positivity by sharing it with everyone you meet. For many folks, positivity doesn't come easily and someone having the compassion to share theirs is a rare and precious gift indeed.

Thanks. :) Sometimes I pretend to find the good things in things most people hate, and then write about them for fun. I could do something like that more often.
https://imgur.com/a/DHNIlbK
https://imgur.com/a/8LwyjIu
https://imgur.com/a/Rk4ReCu


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 70 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

AQ: 40
RAADS-R: 149


quite an extreme
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17 Oct 2018, 2:18 pm

I'm a generally very positive too. But it's also a question wether you want it to be or not. It's not always easy to keep it. Most people get easily used of negative thinking an once they start it they train themself to be that way. Because of this always keep your positivity. It's one of the most important things in life and not always as easy to do.


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Prometheus18
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17 Oct 2018, 5:50 pm

Quote:
Those who strive and hope and live only in the future, always looking ahead and impatiently anticipating what is coming, as something which will make them happy when they get it, are, in spite of their very clever airs, exactly like those donkeys one sees in Italy, whose pace may be hurried by fixing a stick on their heads with a wisp of hay at the end of it; this is always just in front of them, and they keep on trying to get it. Such people are in a constant state of illusion as to their whole existence; they go on living ad interim, until at last they die.


Arthur Schopenhauer



jamthis12
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17 Oct 2018, 7:37 pm

I TRY to be positive, but I can only do so much. Oftentimes I will just break down into bitter, cynical sarcasm and/or depression.


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Rdos: Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 133 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 79 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Edna3362
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17 Oct 2018, 8:24 pm

I would've been one.
In my case, I'm just fewer steps away from being one most at the time.



All I had to do, is forget that I'm very frustrated with my fickle state of 'health' that's been ruining my sleep for years and made me hate sleep growing up, fogging my mind, interrupts my focus on daily basis and wasting my mental processing resources that cuts my functioning short in real time.
OR, entirely don't have it in the first place. Or have a really lucky day of NOT having it then get lucky in a random night time sleep waking up with a non-fogged mind and a truly refreshed brain.

Or, get drunk in chocolate. :lol: Then laugh at everything. Including realities and pointlessness of life and death as 'funny'.


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jamthis12
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17 Oct 2018, 9:25 pm

Not gonna lie, when I'm really bored and annoyed, I tend to become pretty sarcastic and cynical. It's kind of a coping mechanism. Also, staying positive with anxiety and depression plus ASD isn't easy.


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Rdos: Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 133 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 79 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


CockneyRebel
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19 Oct 2018, 12:01 pm

I'm also a very positive person. I like to have a positive attitude at all times. I'm also very happy to be alive and I enjoy life.


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harry12345
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20 Oct 2018, 3:07 am

If people are positive towards me, talk to me, are friendly with me, refrain from pointing out minor errors (i.e. at work) then I tend to be the same back.

If people are negative towards me, ignore me, are un-friendly with, constantly point out minor errors (i.e. at work) then I tend NOT to be the same back, but to generally steer clear of them as much as possible.

If you are in a positive environment then well and good, but in a negative environment (or situation) then, yes, things can spiral rapidly down hill.



shortfatbalduglyman
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20 Oct 2018, 11:46 am

The way I see things is not black white

The current counselor told me, that if someone calls me a "homophobic slur" it is "unfortunate"

For example, "fa***t"

But at least they didn't kill me

:mrgreen:



AltoClarinet
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20 Oct 2018, 8:47 pm

I'm not too positive, but I'm more positive than I used to be. Last year I discovered that the anxiety and depression I've always seem to have had came from trying to deal with the world as an autistic (I was only diagnosed last year.) Sine then I've become more accepting of who I am. And even though depression has been hitting me hard lately, I've been trying not to lose hope. And I do try to see the beauty in things (nature, my neighbourhood, listening to and playing and writing music.)

As for positivity as it relates to autism in general: I think a lot of autistic people are often trusting and forgiving of people, leading them to think more positively about those people. I myself try to give people the benefit of the doubt when I can.



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20 Oct 2018, 9:00 pm

It is extremely rare I am called positive by someone that has actually meant me.
I tend to obsess over things that go wrong, my mind gives me no rest to it.


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nick007
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21 Oct 2018, 11:42 pm

I tend to be pessimistic or maybe just more realistic. I have a LONG history of things not working out for me well in life so I kind of learned not to expect things to. I sometimes think it's better for me to just accept things as they are instead of trying to make them better because I waist time, energy, & resources that could be much better spent trying to just accept bad situations. I think this is a pretty common thing for those of us on the spectrum do to all the problems we face in life & problems interacting with others.


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