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LonelyJar
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02 Nov 2018, 5:49 am

Much like how my dad sometimes forgets to put on his seatbelt before leaving the carport, my mom has a tendency to make phone calls while driving. She doesn't even consider pulling over to the side of the road, or finding some nearby parking garage, or anything! What do you think I should do?



envirozentinel
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02 Nov 2018, 6:42 am

I'm sure she knows it's an unsafe practice.

It depends on your relationship with your mom. Do you get on well with her, have little jokes with her for instance? Then you could mention it in a joky kind of way, perhaps while describing each other's little idiosyncrasies.

If you don't get on very well that's a bit tougher and more tact may be needed. Maybe mention that she might be pulled over if an officer sees her.

Many people do chat on their phones while driving, though they know they shouldn't. In fact even making calls while walking can reduce your focus and cause you to stumble over something!


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IstominFan
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04 Nov 2018, 10:26 am

What she's doing is very dangerous and can get people killed. I hope she doesn't learn this lesson the hard way. In my town, people engage in all kinds of unsafe and just plain crazy driving habits. I'm thinking they should put in car cams as they do in Russia!



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04 Nov 2018, 10:42 am

People still drink and drive too, though they should know better but think they are better than the rest and still sober in their own mind.

"doesn't apply to moi Officer, I jusht had two..."

It's amazing how foolish and self destructive some people can be.


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hobojungle
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04 Nov 2018, 10:59 am

LonelyJar wrote:
What do you think I should do?


Other than refusing to get in the car with her, there is nothing you can do about her behavior.



jimmy m
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04 Nov 2018, 11:50 am

Many times an Aspie perceives the world in black and white terms without any shades of gray in-between. Talking on the phone while driving is very dangerous. It can get you killed. But not everyone gets killed by talking on the phone. When I was young, I never wore a seat belt. That is because seat belts were just invented and not even installed in cars when I was young. I am that old. But even though I never wore a seat belt when I was young, I wasn't killed because I didn't wear one.

So life is wrapped in probability theory. It is filled with chance and quick reaction times. So what to do? Well you could overlook your moms behavior. Or you could try and change her bad habit. But do it in a nice way. Tell her that she is your role model. Begin by explaining to your mom that you are an Aspie and that you view the world in terms of black and white. That you noticed that she is performing a very dangerous act by talking on the phone when driving. And her choice endangers her, you, and others on the roadway. This act can not only lead to an accident but that accident can cause injury and death. Tell you mom that she has a good heart and that you mean well for her and that you wish she would change.

Also explain to your mom that Aspies tend to have tunnel vision when they focus on something. It is your trait. It leads to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). That it will be hard for you to let this fear of "your mom dying because she is talking on the phone while driving" go away. And that you will remind her when she fails. And that you are doing this out of love. You care what happens to her.


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Kiprobalhato
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04 Nov 2018, 4:49 pm

tell her to knock it off or refuse to get in the car with her until she does.


clearly more easily said than done - people at that age are often very much set in their ways.

i'm guessing you don't drive yourself?


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05 Nov 2018, 11:03 am

Yeah mines does too. I belive my mother lives in a fantasy world. Where she thinks nothing bad could ever happen to her I told her several times not to and she just rolls her eyes at me.

My moms always been an overgrown teenager :roll:

There’s nothing you really can do I see people texting while driving all the time people never think it’ll happen to them next thing they know they killed someone or themselves or injured that their whole life has changed all because of a phone.

You can try to confront her guessing you’re young?



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06 Nov 2018, 6:11 am

My mom does that, too. She's 74 and drives like a teenage boy, and she always drives an expensive, spotless new car. It's just her personality. There's not much we can do about that. I do remind her not to do it when she visits because it's illegal here.

You mom probably won't listen to your advice because you'll always be the baby and she's the adult.


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Glflegolas
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13 Nov 2018, 8:30 am

LonelyJar wrote:
Much like how my dad sometimes forgets to put on his seatbelt before leaving the carport, my mom has a tendency to make phone calls while driving. She doesn't even consider pulling over to the side of the road, or finding some nearby parking garage, or anything! What do you think I should do?

You can nominate her for Canada's Worst Driver maybe? This won't work if you don't live in Canada.


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shortfatbalduglyman
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13 Nov 2018, 4:23 pm

Get a headset

:heart:

Not too long ago , only doctors and drug dealers had cell phones

Now , some people can barely have an emotion, thought, statement or action , without making a public service announcement. Over the phone

:mrgreen:


What is there to sit around talking about anyways?


:jester:



Indominus
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20 Nov 2018, 8:24 pm

Tell her to plug her phone to the car...or something. Idk. My mom does that but she plugs it into the radio and these conversations can go on for about...20-40 minutes. The reason why they're so long is because they're business calls...I guess.



DreamerDawn
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21 Nov 2018, 6:26 am

When I was younger I liked to stay in constant touch with my mum when she went out. It got so bad that I started phoning her when she was driving, she had to keep pulling over to answer the phone every ten minutes. In the end she bought a . . . hands free kit thing I think . . . and this wired up the her car and when I phoned it automatically muted the stereo in the car and answered the phone after three rings allowing me and her to talk while she continued to drive. It worked well :)

As for drinking and driving to my knowledge my mum has never done that. I haven't either. Driving required so much concentration that sometimes I had to turn the CD player off in my car, doesn't matter now though as I no longer have a license. I miss my car and being able to drive :(


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