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ShadowProphet
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29 Nov 2018, 4:35 pm

Iv'e seen plenty of men who arne't attractive in the conventional sense have beautiful girlfriends/wives and no it's not always because they're rich.


- People say short guys can't get girls yet I know a guy who's 5 ft 2 and asian and his girlfriend is a cute blonde girl around his height.

- A couple in their early thirties used to regularly come to the gym that I go to and I deadlifted with them a couple of times. The girl was a tall blonde around 5 ft 8 with a cute face and nice body. The husband was roughly the same height, was fat with a beer belly, and didn't have the greatest looking face.

- I knew this girl in college who was easily a 10, was a cheerleader for the college football team, and was in a sorority. You'd think she would only date a typical "Chad" a 6 ft tall good looking white guy. Yet she's dating an average looking asian guy roughly her height.


So I don't think looks matter as much as you think they do. Obviously some girls will care, but these are the girls you don't want to be dating anyways.



Aspie1
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01 Dec 2018, 11:22 am

ShadowProphet wrote:
- People say short guys can't get girls yet I know a guy who's 5 ft 2 and asian and his girlfriend is a cute blonde girl around his height.

- A couple in their early thirties used to regularly come to the gym that I go to and I deadlifted with them a couple of times. The girl was a tall blonde around 5 ft 8 with a cute face and nice body. The husband was roughly the same height, was fat with a beer belly, and didn't have the greatest looking face.

- I knew this girl in college who was easily a 10, was a cheerleader for the college football team, and was in a sorority. You'd think she would only date a typical "Chad" a 6 ft tall good looking white guy. Yet she's dating an average looking asian guy roughly her height.

Not all that glitters is gold, especially when it comes to dating. There's a real possibility that these women were looking for a beta male to settle down with, after spending years "partying" with alpha males, and these men seemed tolerable enough. (Most women do it between ages 28 and 36, the age group I stay away from dating-wise.) The college girl is younger than that, unless she's a nontraditional student.) The women don't feel any attraction to their boyfriends; they just want the stability and the good life that a beta male usually provides. They're not attracted to them, they would be to an alpha male. While these men are soaring 10,000 feet above the ground in pure joy, their girlfriends could easily be feeling a low-level revulsion, and maybe a guilty conscience for feeling that way.

For a point of comparison, chew on this. You're backpacking through Europe with a friend or two, and some guy you just met tells you there's a Slovakian hostel, where women lust after geeky American men (read: beta males). Would you eagerly jump on the next train over, or would think to yourself: "hey, wait a minute, something ain't right". :?



XFilesGeek
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01 Dec 2018, 12:56 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
ShadowProphet wrote:
- People say short guys can't get girls yet I know a guy who's 5 ft 2 and asian and his girlfriend is a cute blonde girl around his height.

- A couple in their early thirties used to regularly come to the gym that I go to and I deadlifted with them a couple of times. The girl was a tall blonde around 5 ft 8 with a cute face and nice body. The husband was roughly the same height, was fat with a beer belly, and didn't have the greatest looking face.

- I knew this girl in college who was easily a 10, was a cheerleader for the college football team, and was in a sorority. You'd think she would only date a typical "Chad" a 6 ft tall good looking white guy. Yet she's dating an average looking asian guy roughly her height.

Not all that glitters is gold, especially when it comes to dating. There's a real possibility that these women were looking for a beta male to settle down with, after spending years "partying" with alpha males, and these men seemed tolerable enough. (Most women do it between ages 28 and 36, the age group I stay away from dating-wise.) The college girl is younger than that, unless she's a nontraditional student.) The women don't feel any attraction to their boyfriends; they just want the stability and the good life that a beta male usually provides. They're not attracted to them, they would be to an alpha male. While these men are soaring 10,000 feet above the ground in pure joy, their girlfriends could easily be feeling a low-level revulsion, and maybe a guilty conscience for feeling that way.

For a point of comparison, chew on this. You're backpacking through Europe with a friend or two, and some guy you just met tells you there's a Slovakian hostel, where women lust after geeky American men (read: beta males). Would you eagerly jump on the next train over, or would think to yourself: "hey, wait a minute, something ain't right". :?


Stop it with the "incel" crap. It's not welcome on WP.


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rdos
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01 Dec 2018, 4:22 pm

Whenever I hear somebody complain that men want to dominate or be in charge of women, or that they see women as sex objects, I stop reading. Clearly, none of that junk is relevant to autistics. I doubt it is relevant for any considerable number of men in general either. Let's face it. If you are a dominant male, you fit perfectly into today's dating culture and thus have no problem finding women. Which means it is all junk when applied to NDs.



Runo Misaki
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17 Mar 2020, 2:18 pm

When I think of incels, I think of men that are misogynistic, horny and super perverted freaks that like raping any woman who doesn't sleep with them and treating women like property and sex objects. Hate inches. They're the worst.



rick42
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28 Mar 2020, 10:04 am

Incels don't necessary have to be people who are sexist/misogynistic against women.When I think of incels,I think of people who are involuntary single because no woman likes them. You could say incel means a similar definition as involuntary celibate,but the only difference is that involuntary celibate involves just the lack of sex,while incel includes being considered undateable and disliked by women,which is the case with me. Everyone pretty much believes that I'm undateable and worthless to women,so I would qualify as a incel.



Last edited by rick42 on 28 Mar 2020, 10:08 am, edited 1 time in total.

kraftiekortie
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28 Mar 2020, 10:07 am

But why would you say that? What makes you “undatable”?



rick42
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28 Mar 2020, 10:39 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
But why would you say that? What makes you “undatable”?



Well most if not all people think I'm not good enough be with any woman due my social awareness alone and usually social awareness is seen as major red flag for men.I also have other negative qualities that would would me undateable such as I not charismatic,my personally is seen as boring, not athletic/very good looking,rarely make people laugh with me,don't have a car,don't have any experience dating(starts to matter a lot after a certain age,),seen as shy,etc .Overall I have too much going against me and will have even more things going against me with the cornavirus situation. Even my family thinks I'm undateable which is why I don't make much of a effort to date anymore.



kraftiekortie
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28 Mar 2020, 12:25 pm

I don’t have many of the qualities you mentioned—yet I’ve been with quite a few women.

That picture is of me. I’m short, chubby, uncharismatic, owned no car until age 51, couldn’t drive until age 37. Not witty. Not funny. Dull. Into my own thing.



hurtloam
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28 Mar 2020, 1:22 pm

rdos wrote:
Whenever I hear somebody complain that men want to dominate or be in charge of women, or that they see women as sex objects, I stop reading. Clearly, none of that junk is relevant to autistics. I doubt it is relevant for any considerable number of men in general either. Let's face it. If you are a dominant male, you fit perfectly into today's dating culture and thus have no problem finding women. Which means it is all junk when applied to NDs.


I disagree. You can have the desire to do something even if you don't possess the skills to do it.

I was getting to know a very shy aspie guy in a dating sense, but he turned out to be someone who really wanted to be in control. I don't like being controlled. You would never have guessed that's how he was from his outward appearance. He seemed shy, awkward and unassuming, but he is really cold, haughty and arrogant. Especially when he can't be bothered putting on a nice act anymore.



Karamazov
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28 Mar 2020, 1:24 pm

I’m 5’10”, skinny, my nose veers off to one side, my teeth are crooked and all mismatched sizes, my chins small and weak, I both stammer and stutter when anxious: and even when not anxious my voice is so quiet and deep most folks don’t notice I’m talking at all. I also can talk for hours when I’m on a roll... people have literally fallen asleep whilst I’m talking! :lol:
If I’m not overwhelmed by an emotion I’m “unreadable”: which is apparently quite disturbing.
Never learnt to drive, never held down a full time job, never successfully approached a woman in my life.
Several women have taken me home however, and I’m married.
(And yes, she proposed)

Good point hurtloam.
Wholeheartedly agree.



Tim_Tex
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28 Mar 2020, 1:40 pm

Unfortunately, all other topics get ignored on here.


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Fnord
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28 Mar 2020, 1:56 pm

rick42 wrote:
Well most if not all people think I'm not good enough be with any woman ... Even my family thinks I'm undateable ...
Stop right there. You do not know what all people think. You do not even know what most people think. And unless someone actually tells they think you are boring, shy, or undateable, you will never know that as a fact, either.

Stop worrying about what other people think -- or what you only imagine they think -- because that's just an excuse.


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rick42
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28 Mar 2020, 2:16 pm

Karamazov wrote:
I’m 5’10”, skinny, my nose veers off to one side, my teeth are crooked and all mismatched sizes, my chins small and weak, I both stammer and stutter when anxious: and even when not anxious my voice is so quiet and deep most folks don’t notice I’m talking at all. I also can talk for hours when I’m on a roll... people have literally fallen asleep whilst I’m talking! :lol:
If I’m not overwhelmed by an emotion I’m “unreadable”: which is apparently quite disturbing.
Never learnt to drive, never held down a full time job, never successfully approached a woman in my life.
Several women have taken me home however, and I’m married.
(And yes, she proposed)

Good point hurtloam.
Wholeheartedly agree.


You're actually married despite not holding a full time job? Wow,you are one lucky dude.I actually had a full time job once and I still couldn't even get women to like me as a friend,let alone be a relationship with them. From from my previous experiences,a man being social awkward is huge turn off to women.Do women in your area accept your social awkwardness? Would women see a you as moocher since you accept women to drive you home?



rick42
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28 Mar 2020, 2:32 pm

Fnord wrote:
rick42 wrote:
Well most if not all people think I'm not good enough be with any woman ... Even my family thinks I'm undateable ...
Stop right there. You do not know what all people think. You do not even know what most people think. And unless someone actually tells they think you are boring, shy, or undateable, you will never know that as a fact, either.

Stop worrying about what other people think -- or what you only imagine they think -- because that's just an excuse.



So I'm "just imaging" that people see me as undateable,despite of my experiences that proved otherwise. :x I have asked many women out for dates over the years and not a single one wanted to date me due to for various of reasons. Women have told me that I was boring,creepy,rude,unworthy,etc .Women have told me that they won't date a man who isn't charismatic and doesn't have a car.Women also called me broke and a moocher for not owning a car. I have asked family members for dating advice and they said"you're not good enough to be with a woman or why would women date someone like you ".



Last edited by rick42 on 28 Mar 2020, 3:35 pm, edited 2 times in total.