I can't even talk about this stuff anymore.

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cberg
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15 Dec 2018, 11:27 pm

A friend asked me last night something to the effect of why I'm not on Tinder. I suppose I have a good answer but it would not make for good conversation. Even if that were strictly my philosophical disagreements with corporate social networks, it still wouldn't be a good conversation and I have a lot more reasons referred to in the title of the thread. I'm more than a little burnt out on trusting new acquaintances because in most cases I'd probably rather study code all day. Perhaps I'll post more on this if anyone else does, but I'm getting away from these monitors for now.


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cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 3:03 pm

I'm not really here to post about how hopeless I feel, that's pointless. I think I'm here to post about why 80+ people click my threads here without replying.

Do the mods here just hate me? /S Obviously one of you does but I'm not here to blame you either. I just think it's lame that I have to complain before anyone replies. I made a thread about the reality of how I feel as a guy & no one gives me the time of day. I'm done with that sexist noise. It's clear lately that people have plenty of reasons to ignore or alienate me so I guess be thankful I'm to lazy to reciprocate?


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kraftiekortie
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16 Dec 2018, 3:07 pm

You’re better-looking than I am, possibly smarter.

I believe you’ll better meeting people if you don’t overthink this.



cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 3:19 pm

I'm afraid the issue with avoiding overthinking is that it can cause me to avoid thinking. If I'm not always considering how different I am from other people, someone's going to notice & possibly take issue with that. It kind of seems like I have to forget my past & many details of who I am to enter that state of mind.

I'm not agoraphobic but I'm also really tired of trying to prove that to women who probably aren't interested anyway. As a rule, everyone just walks away when they encounter any hints of my real feelings. I spend too much time with technology to not be seen differently & I don't enjoy this 'masking' thing but it also just seems like common courtesy towards the tiny minority that ever made an effort to treat me otherwise.


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16 Dec 2018, 3:26 pm

cberg wrote:
I'm not really here to post about how hopeless I feel, that's pointless. I think I'm here to post about why 80+ people click my threads here without replying...
I can’t speak for the others, but I usually do a click-and-run because I find nothing worth replying to.



cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 3:30 pm

I guess there's no way of getting a yes or no about my shyness being the entire problem in that case; no one can tell from writing.

I feel projected onto everywhere I go; there's no shaking the collective reputation of living in a totally different culture to that of most people I know. No one wants to know the truth of all this, or they'd ask. I'm also not interested in telling anyone because that just isolated me more.


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Raleigh
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16 Dec 2018, 3:36 pm

If you think you're apart from everyone else you probably are.

I'm never sure what you're looking for in the way of responses.
It would help to have a clearer question or statement but I know that's not the way of the berg.


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cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 3:43 pm

Tl;Dr you don't even want to know. I could ask a much clearer question but it would make for a lousy discussion & that probably belongs in the adult section anyway. If I were completely honest about this I would prevent everyone from giving me clear answers because none of us have a clue about that stuff. Suffice it to say I live on the side of the gene pool where they're adding chlorine to forget about everything in it. There is no right way to tell anyone who I am because practically nobody has ever said any of that.

I'd like to think otherwise, thus manifesting a completely different way of existence for myself but I don't want to lie to myself or anyone.


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Fnord
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16 Dec 2018, 3:46 pm

In other words, you’re blaming others for not being interested instead of blaming yourself for not being interesting; you are blaming others for not understanding what you want instead of making your wants understood (or even understandable).



Raleigh
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16 Dec 2018, 3:50 pm

cberg wrote:
Tl;Dr you don't even want to know. I could ask a much clearer question but it would make for a lousy discussion & that probably belongs in the adult section anyway. If I were completely honest about this I would prevent everyone from giving me clear answers because none of us have a clue about that stuff. Suffice it to say I live on the side of the gene pool where they're adding chlorine to forget about everything in it. There is no right way to tell anyone who I am because practically nobody has ever said any of that.

I'd like to think otherwise, thus manifesting a completely different way of existence for myself but I don't want to lie to myself or anyone.

Is this because of what you disclosed in the LGBT thread?
A gene pool is a pool because there's usually others like you in that pool, otherwise it would be a single drop.


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cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 3:56 pm

Fnord wrote:
In other words, you’re blaming others for not being interested instead of blaming yourself for not being interesting; you are blaming others for not understanding what you want instead of making your wants understood (or even understandable).


The only time I mentioned blame here was about someone I didn't blame. I an not responsible for others' actions unless they're predicated on me.

Most of my wants are too simple & basic to be believed. Everyone projects some ulterior motive on my part because they can't believe I would just want to chill with them & discuss what else we want later.


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-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 4:18 pm

Raleigh wrote:
cberg wrote:
Tl;Dr you don't even want to know. I could ask a much clearer question but it would make for a lousy discussion & that probably belongs in the adult section anyway. If I were completely honest about this I would prevent everyone from giving me clear answers because none of us have a clue about that stuff. Suffice it to say I live on the side of the gene pool where they're adding chlorine to forget about everything in it. There is no right way to tell anyone who I am because practically nobody has ever said any of that.

I'd like to think otherwise, thus manifesting a completely different way of existence for myself but I don't want to lie to myself or anyone.

Is this because of what you disclosed in the LGBT thread?
A gene pool is a pool because there's usually others like you in that pool, otherwise it would be a single drop.


Yeah, but we would fit in a metaphysical eyedropper.

I'm not sure what explains my life & what doesn't. The best answer I have to date is synthetic fumes. Fnord asks what I need & the short answer is NOT MUCH; I'm far more used to nothing.


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-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Dec 2018, 4:20 pm

But....you're still talking about this stuff! :lol: (Whatever it is, this stuff...)



cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 4:23 pm

That would tend to come off as a zero sum but all I'm really doing is trying to get comfortable enough with my weirdo self to make other people similarly comfortable.


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-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


Raleigh
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16 Dec 2018, 4:32 pm

cberg wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
cberg wrote:
Tl;Dr you don't even want to know. I could ask a much clearer question but it would make for a lousy discussion & that probably belongs in the adult section anyway. If I were completely honest about this I would prevent everyone from giving me clear answers because none of us have a clue about that stuff. Suffice it to say I live on the side of the gene pool where they're adding chlorine to forget about everything in it. There is no right way to tell anyone who I am because practically nobody has ever said any of that.

I'd like to think otherwise, thus manifesting a completely different way of existence for myself but I don't want to lie to myself or anyone.

Is this because of what you disclosed in the LGBT thread?
A gene pool is a pool because there's usually others like you in that pool, otherwise it would be a single drop.


Yeah, but we would fit in a metaphysical eyedropper.

I'm not sure what explains my life & what doesn't. The best answer I have to date is synthetic fumes. Fnord asks what I need & the short answer is NOT MUCH; I'm far more used to nothing.

Why do you need to explain your life?
If you try it only makes things murkier, I find.
It's like telling someone you love them - I would rather show them over a lifetime than try to work out my feelings and put it into words, which are ridiculously inadequate.
Anyone can say I love you.
Not everyone can live I love you.


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cberg
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16 Dec 2018, 4:43 pm

Raleigh wrote:
cberg wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
cberg wrote:
Tl;Dr you don't even want to know. I could ask a much clearer question but it would make for a lousy discussion & that probably belongs in the adult section anyway. If I were completely honest about this I would prevent everyone from giving me clear answers because none of us have a clue about that stuff. Suffice it to say I live on the side of the gene pool where they're adding chlorine to forget about everything in it. There is no right way to tell anyone who I am because practically nobody has ever said any of that.

I'd like to think otherwise, thus manifesting a completely different way of existence for myself but I don't want to lie to myself or anyone.

Is this because of what you disclosed in the LGBT thread?
A gene pool is a pool because there's usually others like you in that pool, otherwise it would be a single drop.


Yeah, but we would fit in a metaphysical eyedropper.

I'm not sure what explains my life & what doesn't. The best answer I have to date is synthetic fumes. Fnord asks what I need & the short answer is NOT MUCH; I'm far more used to nothing.

Why do you need to explain your life?
If you try it only makes things murkier, I find.
It's like telling someone you love them - I would rather show them over a lifetime than try to work out my feelings and put it into words, which are ridiculously inadequate.
Anyone can say I love you.
Not everyone can live I love you.


Ah yes, I also feel like I'd run the risk of cheapening someone's experience of me by putting it into words. I guess it's worth a try explaining myself once or twice but it's better to do that allegorically anyway. Could it be that I'm actually banking on my own rarity even though I'm always thinking it's a problem? My head's not even in the clouds, it's full of satellites.


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-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen: