Girls don't like me

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Growing up the girls didn't like me or want to be my friend. It's the same now. Nobody wants to be near me, ever. Some guys would look my way but no one ever spoke.

Now it's just the same. I've always been polite and friendly, I do struggle with communication but unless they spoke with me they would never know.

Why do you think people don't like me?

Adele

Based on the description, there is not enough information to answer the question



However, many people only want to be friends with people that are similar to them

If your clothes or body appears different from theirs, they might not want to be your friend

What evidence do you have to support that?

In many occasions I feel that people don't like me but later I realize that my feelings of inadequacy are responsible for such sensation. Some other times I realize it's me who doesn't like them, but for some reason I'm projecting my own thoughts onto them.

If someone said to me that they don't like me I would actually feel relieved since I wouldn't have to guess it myself any longer.

Haha! Join the club!

This thread reminds me of this short from Seasame Street. How do they know you want to be friends if you don't talk to them?

If you want friends, you may want to try approaching them first, instead of waiting for them to make the first move. Particularly guys, who expect you to signal that it is OK for them to approach you by body language. It is likely that you haven't learned that part of social communication. Even if you get the body language screwed up, making the first move can get past that.

People can be weird and petty. It might not be anything you're doing wrong. It says more about them than it does you.

Can you give specific examples? Sometimes (and I'm not saying you're doing this), we can convince ourselves things that aren't necessarily true or overthink things. It's possible you're misreading their signals. Unless you give me examples, it's hard for me to see.

Well, I think we all have things we can work on, not that people are inherently unlikable. But I don't know your circumstances, so I'm not sure about this particular situation.

I think I understand though, I feel like that too. I spend 4 months straight alongside a group of women going through yoga teacher training, and I walked out without a single friend. I tried to make friends, but I'm pretty sure that I gave off some closed-off vibe or something because since the day I left not a single person has contacted me. I haven't contacted anyone either so that probably has something to do with it. I did ask one person who reminded me a lot of myself if she wanted to get together some time since we lived so close to each other, but she never reached out. Others in the group are basically best friends now..

Maybe you're giving off a certain vibe. I've learned that when you smile a lot, people are more apt to come up speak to you. People have told me I have a mean looking face sometimes. I'm not saying this is your problem, but I didn't even know it was mine until it was pointed out. Maybe ask a NT person around you to help point out the issue if it arises?

Welcome to the club.

I hope this can help. It won't help you make friends but it might help you understand the dynamics of female friendships. It's a book called, " you're the only one I can tell" by Deborah Tannen.