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MoonRiver
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26 Jan 2019, 8:51 am

Hi, I recently got a job and called in "sick" today. I don't want to continue. If someone at work is lazy, unproductive, gets in my way or is rude or makes derogatory comments about others, I just ignore it or give some sort of generic non committal response and move on. However, I feel that when I get home and I'm not in "work mode" anymore that a flood of anger, tears, frustrations and sadness hits me. I can literally cry, rant and ruminate for hours. This messes with my sleep schedule as I literally can't calm down or make it stop. And I find this more stressful than work itself. So, how do I maintain a job and live like a normal person? I've got 40 years of working life ahead of me and I just can't see myself holding a job. Even if I was in massive debt (I'm only in a little bit so far) that's still not enough to motivate me to want to go to work when it has such a monumental affect on my mental health. Anyone else in the same position and what do I do?



shortfatbalduglyman
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26 Jan 2019, 11:25 am

Three times got canned, in the first three days



f**k those ass holes :!:



:mrgreen:


Now nobody will hire my worthless corpse,

Furthermore, no job skills. Six out of ten personality disorders officially diagnosed



BTDT
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26 Jan 2019, 12:09 pm

I find it helps if I can do something to get out of that nasty way of thinking.

Putting puzzles together.
Playing scrabble or some other game against a clock.
Gardening
sewing
cooking a good multi-course meal
shopping (you may not want to do this until you get out of debt, but it works for me)
reading

Avoid social media and television.



AprilR
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27 Jan 2019, 2:52 am

From my experience, work is just a test of patience against bad people. I've worked two times before ended up quitting both times.



MoonRiver
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27 Jan 2019, 5:48 am

AprilR wrote:
From my experience, work is just a test of patience against bad people. I've worked two times before ended up quitting both times.


Yep! This is a good way of putting it. And in the end, they seem to have the stamina to play the long game while we are the ones who burn out. *sigh*



BTDT
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27 Jan 2019, 9:52 am

Yes, Aspies often work too hard. We take the orders of the boss literally (black/white thinking) and do too much work. We really should be spending more time watching what experienced people are doing to keep their jobs.



TrippyRabbit99
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28 Jan 2019, 4:20 pm

I feel you, people try to tell me all the time well you have to ..work when I really dont care I've been working since I was 16 at a diner with a 1950s theme to it. And been working jobs from grocery stocker to cashier I just dont care. I see how quickly and random ways people die and I think is that it?

Making minimum wage only to die of cancer get hit by car or one of the other million ways people die. People wont even remember me after my parents kick it. I just dont see a point especially with depersonlization giving me an everlasting extenstial crisis



Alita
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29 Jan 2019, 2:02 pm

Your problem is not with work, it's with f***wit people. And f***wit people will piss you off even if you're a millionaire and don't need to work. So I could say find another job, but chances are as soon as you find an awesome positive place with great peeps, within a year a new f***wit recruit will come on board and make your life a living hell again.

If you can afford it, or if there is a free option available where you live, I would counsel you to get professional help to deal with the emotions. I know exactly what you're going through because I am the same way. I've lost more sleep over negative interactions with people than over anything else in life. A therapist can work out some strategies with you to deal with f***wits who annoy you. I would also recommend the book 'Change Your Thinking' by Prof. Sarah Edelman - it has helped me a lot, especially around annoying, nasty, selfish and negative people.

The only other way I know of that shuts my brain up so I can at least function is getting the adrenaline pumping...a long walk or a little workout...some cool music...at the end of it I reek of sweat but always feel better. Otherwise, I'll just be sitting in front of a screen imagining all the ways the people who've pissed me off could die before I next see them. :skull:

In general, I find the jobs which require the least specialised skills top the list for exhibiting the worst traits of humanity.

[NB - the asterixes are mine]


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MoonRiver
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05 Feb 2019, 10:48 am

Alita wrote:
Your problem is not with work, it's with f***wit people. And f***wit people will piss you off even if you're a millionaire and don't need to work. So I could say find another job, but chances are as soon as you find an awesome positive place with great peeps, within a year a new f***wit recruit will come on board and make your life a living hell again.

If you can afford it, or if there is a free option available where you live, I would counsel you to get professional help to deal with the emotions. I know exactly what you're going through because I am the same way. I've lost more sleep over negative interactions with people than over anything else in life. A therapist can work out some strategies with you to deal with f***wits who annoy you. I would also recommend the book 'Change Your Thinking' by Prof. Sarah Edelman - it has helped me a lot, especially around annoying, nasty, selfish and negative people.

The only other way I know of that shuts my brain up so I can at least function is getting the adrenaline pumping...a long walk or a little workout...some cool music...at the end of it I reek of sweat but always feel better. Otherwise, I'll just be sitting in front of a screen imagining all the ways the people who've pissed me off could die before I next see them. :skull:

In general, I find the jobs which require the least specialised skills top the list for exhibiting the worst traits of humanity.

[NB - the asterixes are mine]


Thank you so very much for your reply. You hit the nail on the head and I do truly feel you know what it’s like. When you put it like this, it makes a lot more sense. Thanks for understanding :)



Alita
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06 Feb 2019, 3:56 pm

MoonRiver wrote:
Alita wrote:
Your problem is not with work, it's with f***wit people. And f***wit people will piss you off even if you're a millionaire and don't need to work. So I could say find another job, but chances are as soon as you find an awesome positive place with great peeps, within a year a new f***wit recruit will come on board and make your life a living hell again.

If you can afford it, or if there is a free option available where you live, I would counsel you to get professional help to deal with the emotions. I know exactly what you're going through because I am the same way. I've lost more sleep over negative interactions with people than over anything else in life. A therapist can work out some strategies with you to deal with f***wits who annoy you. I would also recommend the book 'Change Your Thinking' by Prof. Sarah Edelman - it has helped me a lot, especially around annoying, nasty, selfish and negative people.

The only other way I know of that shuts my brain up so I can at least function is getting the adrenaline pumping...a long walk or a little workout...some cool music...at the end of it I reek of sweat but always feel better. Otherwise, I'll just be sitting in front of a screen imagining all the ways the people who've pissed me off could die before I next see them. :skull:

In general, I find the jobs which require the least specialised skills top the list for exhibiting the worst traits of humanity.

[NB - the asterixes are mine]


Thank you so very much for your reply. You hit the nail on the head and I do truly feel you know what it’s like. When you put it like this, it makes a lot more sense. Thanks for understanding :)


Glad I could be of some help. :D


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"There once was a little molecule who dreamed of being part of the crest of a high wave..."
(From the story 'The Little Molecule' - Amazon Kindle, 2013)


Summer_Twilight
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06 Feb 2019, 5:35 pm

MoonRiver wrote:
Hi, I recently got a job and called in "sick" today. I don't want to continue. If someone at work is lazy, unproductive, gets in my way or is rude or makes derogatory comments about others, I just ignore it or give some sort of generic non committal response and move on. However, I feel that when I get home and I'm not in "work mode" anymore that a flood of anger, tears, frustrations and sadness hits me. I can literally cry, rant and ruminate for hours. This messes with my sleep schedule as I literally can't calm down or make it stop. And I find this more stressful than work itself. So, how do I maintain a job and live like a normal person? I've got 40 years of working life ahead of me and I just can't see myself holding a job. Even if I was in massive debt (I'm only in a little bit so far) that's still not enough to motivate me to want to go to work when it has such a monumental affect on my mental health. Anyone else in the same position and what do I do?


Crying and getting angry when you get home is completely fine and if anything else, it means that you are letting out your anger through crying is healthy. I do it all the time and while I feel angry, it makes me stronger.

For me, right now, I am working with a whole group of woman at work who have bonded and have been sticking together as a clique, while I am not in it. There are several times where I have wanted to join but they always blow me off. "We have some personal information is that okay?" I often cry every time because it's frustrating because I feel like an outsider.



kokopelli
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06 Feb 2019, 5:42 pm

I've never had a job where the first few days were at all comfortable for me. It gets better after adjusting to the new routine.



KanyeWestFan
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10 Feb 2019, 4:13 am

I only had 5 jobs and I only held 2 for a long period of time. I actually lasted 2 days on my recent job just like you. Its hard I know but you gotta find the right job for you and do your best. The world revolves around money so you have to make something happen. Again I know how hard it feels, I felt like crying at many times as well