Why does no one want me to have a relationship?

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Oh true. I wonder why. I hope these links work.
https://plus.google.com/116778942214783 ... g7V9DKzRvZ
https://plus.google.com/116778942214783 ... dXW9DJco4S

Thanks, blooiejagwa. I just hope I won't have to wait until I am 44 to say that my life is better.

Why does it matter how old you are? Why is having a gf the only thing you think about? Don't you have any hobbies to occupy your time? That might be part of the problem. I wouldn't want to date someone that complained and had excuses for everything about why they couldn't do something (you do seem to have an excuse for everything) and didn't have any hobbies.

He does have hobbies, or at least he used to, don't know if he does anymore. He used to play guitar and draw... but I don't exactly hear him talk about these things here other than the fact that he isn't as good at them as he'd like to be.

Markins, maybe this is part of your problem? You know, maybe you don't talk enough about normal stuff that concerns you when you meet women? I mean, if you see a woman and decide to try and get to know her, what do you talk about with her? I certainly hope it's not the same stuff you mainly speak about with us here, please tell me it isn't.

I do indeed have hobbies. I've read three novels over the last two months, I collect (and read) Marvel and DC comics as well as manga, and I sometimes play video games. I still struggle with the guitar and I haven't attempted to draw lately.

I don't tell strangers my deep emotions. Where I live, I would be considered "gay" or a serial killer in waiting if I did because men are expected to suppress their emotions and be iron pumping alpha males. There is also a huge gender divide where I live. Men and women are both pressured to have different interests as well as different behaviors. A lot of women in my area are also religious and have tried to proselytize to me. Some, including my mother, even think birth control is bad and think women shouldn't be involved with politics or business.

I haven't really tried to get to know a woman since 2017. She liked manga and after talking to her a few times about the subject, I asked her out for coffee but she turned the offer down. I suppose I was trying to imitate the behavior men in the culture I live in generally do. Where I live is Aspergers Hell.

I find it ironic your mother would say that about women in business or politics, since she's a doctor which was (and still is to some degree) considered a "male profession".

I tend to think she became a doctor because she wanted to come off as high status. She's always been concerned about appearances and tried to get in favor with the upper crust people in the area. She even pressured me to dress like a "yuppie" (I can't stand that word) in hopes of impressing others.

She actually discouraged me from wanting a girlfriend and tried to get me a vasectomy because she was paranoid I was going to get a girl pregnant. Her fears were unfounded, atleast for me, because it was my siblings who had unsafe sex and have kids because they kept demanding their girlfriends to use birth control but never themselves.

I had someone tell me "Nice guys finish last." two days ago. I saw that phrase a lot when I was becoming depressed and trying to figure out why I didn't have a girlfriend despite being nice while the "bad boys" in high school were yelling at girls, punching them in the face, and humiliating them in various ways but they were always getting dates. I took it as being told nice guys never get girlfriends.

You're talking about high school, Mark.

It was like that for me in high school, too. I thought the same way you did.

But then I realized that girls/women usually change once they get out of high school---and even more once they get past college age.

Also: take it from the source. "Nice Guys Finish last" is a paraphrase of something a baseball manager named Leo Durocher said in reference to a guy who was an all-time great baseball player and Hall of Famer.

Mel Ott, the guy he was talking about, finished first in many ways, even though he was a nice guy.

Fits the criteria of narcissism https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissis ... y_disorder

Probably so. Whenever she took me somewhere, she was constantly on to me about my behavior and what I did no matter how trivial it was.

I got these links in a different thread, I think they may be useful for you:

Since those links are posted by a detractor, I don't want to view them.

It's your choice.

They seem like useful links.

8 Reasons Why People Deny Childhood Trauma and Its Results

8 Toxic Ways Narcissistic Mothers Emotionally Abuse Their Children

How Society Gaslights Survivors of Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Psychopaths

The Cycle of Child Abuse and How to End It

Did you see what she said to me back on the first page? She even said she was being rude on purpose to me. Why would I want to look up anything by someone who essentially gave me a verbal middle finger?