Marriage to AS wife

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I've read a few posts yet there doesn't seem any I can relate to.

I'm NT man and married to wife of 15 years, she was diagnosed with AS last year.

She's a very good communicator and very in touch with her feelings and emotions. Even can read me better than I can myself.

Yet there's extreme difficulties in our marriage. I tell her things of encouragement yet she doesn't seem to receive it or even forget it in the future.

Just wondering on peoples thoughts...

When you have AS it can be hard to appreciate what gifts you have. Often, there is too much emphasis on what is missing.

I'm also NT and have noticed this weird thing about my AS partner.

If someone makes a sarcastic comment towards him, he completely misses it, goes right over his head. But if someone honestly compliments him, THAT he takes as an insult and it upsets him.

Is that what she does? If it is, I don't know what to tell you. I haven't figured that one out yet.

Welcome to Wrong Planet.

One of the traits of an Aspie is that they do not understand the use of gestures or sarcasm (may not understand the subtleties of language, such as irony and humor).

So when I was young, I was ridiculed and was called almost every vile name in the book. When people paid me a compliment, many times is was actually a way that they ridiculed me. If they said, "they liked my hairstyle" they were actually making fun of my hair in front of my peers.

So as an older Aspie, I tend to let compliments fly over my head. I pay them no attention because I cannot in many cases tell if they are real compliment or sarcasm.