Positive ways to reaquaint with women

Page 2 of 2 [ 24 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

Zack1994
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

Joined: 13 Jan 2019
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 385

12 Mar 2019, 9:28 pm

cberg wrote:
I'm not exactly photogenic. :jester:
Image

I'm thinking of getting somewhat different glasses.


No, because that picture brighten up my day.



The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 29,637
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

13 Mar 2019, 2:22 am

cberg wrote:
I'm not exactly photogenic. :jester:
Image

I'm thinking of getting somewhat different glasses.


You can easily adopt a hipster style; it is way more successful than the geeky style, based on what I observe.



Map84
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

Joined: 25 Feb 2019
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 214
Location: U.K.

13 Mar 2019, 10:17 am

cberg wrote:
I'm not exactly photogenic. :jester:
Image

I'm thinking of getting somewhat different glasses.


I have a former friend (turned acquaintance... thanks social anxiety) that looks really very similar to you, both genetically and in terms of style (style is identical in fact even down to the hair and glasses), he's probably a bit chubbier than you which is about the only visual difference, and he does REALLY well with the ladies, some really pretty ones too.
If doing any of those changes will make you more confident then it will help you be more attractive to the opposite sex, if chopping your hair up and swapping your hoodie for a expensive shirt will make you feel uncomfortable or false then it'll repel them.


_________________
INTJ-t
AQ50: 34
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 107 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 88 of 200


quite an extreme
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2018
Age: 321
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,598
Location: Germany

13 Mar 2019, 5:17 pm

cberg wrote:
Are you saying that the first time women EVER met me informs everything or are you saying that seeing different aspects of me is a turn on?

I think most women decide within the first second whether they like you or not. But beside of your behaviour and size your outfit counts a lot. The ZZ Top video isn't real life of course. Girls aren't this self-confident towards strangers except may be hookers. But once a girl likes you she'll try to get in touch with you.

Map84 wrote:
if chopping your hair up and swapping your hoodie for a expensive shirt will make you feel uncomfortable or false then it'll repel them.

That's totally right. But most shirts aren't more expensive than a hoody as long as you aren't into labels.
But I don't think that chopping the hair would improve anything. I think that lots of girls do like long hair as long as a guy doesn't start to look feminin.


_________________
I am as I am. :skull: :sunny: :wink: :sunny: :skull:
Life should be an adventure!


cberg
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Dec 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,316
Location: Boulder CO

13 Mar 2019, 8:14 pm

In that case, considering we're talking about someone I actually know, I should probably just worry less & she might feel better as a result.

I think I'll dress somewhat more neatly & keep most of my hair, though I might get a good trim soon for practical reasons.


_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


cberg
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Dec 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,316
Location: Boulder CO

13 Mar 2019, 8:59 pm

Quote:
I think most women decide within the first second whether they like you or not. But beside of your behaviour and size your outfit counts a lot. The ZZ Top video isn't real life of course. Girls aren't this self-confident towards strangers except may be hookers. But once a girl likes you she'll try to get in touch with you.


This feels like a generalization. Would any women here care to post a counterpoint? I'm not trying to appeal to any of our negative inclinations.


_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


Alterity
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Feb 2019
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 508
Location: New England

13 Mar 2019, 10:52 pm

cberg wrote:
Quote:
I think most women decide within the first second whether they like you or not. But beside of your behaviour and size your outfit counts a lot. The ZZ Top video isn't real life of course. Girls aren't this self-confident towards strangers except may be hookers. But once a girl likes you she'll try to get in touch with you.


This feels like a generalization. Would any women here care to post a counterpoint? I'm not trying to appeal to any of our negative inclinations.


It takes is a tenth of a second to form an impression of a stranger from their face according to most studies. It's not exclusive to women or men. So one could say someone may make the judgement of whether they are attracted to you within that impression time.

But that is just an initial impression. I wouldn't conclude that the first impression is going to entirely dictate whether they'll give you a chance or not. In addition once you start to get to know someone your perception of them changes, that includes how you see them physically.

There are self confident and out going women that would go after an attractive stranger that aren't hookers. Maybe not so handsy, but I can think of a couple women that'd walk up to an attractive stranger, and tell them they are cute.

These aren't necessarily things for you/cberg to worry about too much since you're mostly focused on rebranding yourself with those you already know, right? I mean you can always spiffy yourself up but first impression has passed in this case o.o

Rather than worrying about little details, simply to taking time to groom and look together (aka things go together, don't look like you pulled them off the floor, venue appropriate etc) says more important things than a fashionable shirt, or expensive accessory. Additionally giving off a feeling that you're comfortable and confident in your own skin is what really makes an outfit.


_________________
"Inside the heart of each and every one of us there is a longing to be understood by someone who really cares. When a person is understood, he or she can put up with almost anything in the world."


cberg
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Dec 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,316
Location: Boulder CO

15 Mar 2019, 12:41 am

More than aesthetics, I'm interested in taking better care of people, starting with paying more attention to femininity.

I get isolated from this behind one screen or another 9 days out of 10.


_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


Last bumped by cberg on 15 Mar 2019, 12:41 am.