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icehouselover1984
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12 Mar 2019, 10:18 pm

Lately there is a girl I like whos usually around me in my residence at school, but I always see her talk to other people easily and not me, even though she knows I like her. It's just when I see her approaching and hugging her friends, I get a bit envious unfortunately :(. I have made small talk with her sometimes and I say hi to her and she says hi back when we are passing by each other. It does seem though that she may be a bit nervous around me/is not interested in me maybe. However I am nervous to approach her when she is talking with her friends, i.e in the cafeteria where she usually is, as it is a group of people. I don't do well in group conversations, and also feel it may be weird to approach her in a group as she knows I like her. Also sometimes I look at her too much when shes around me lol, in case she notices and finds it creepy(she has noticed sometimes). Any advice? I'm new to this sort of thing lol



wrongcitizen
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12 Mar 2019, 10:46 pm

In the past I would usually go up to a girl and compliment her, that sends her the signal that you are interested. Try to very gradually befriend her, then work towards romance, but don't ask prematurely and wait a short while (a few weeks). For me, I don't immediately disclose the Asperger's diagnosis to them either.

Also, don't worry too much about rejection, embarrassment, or any of that. Know that everyone feels very nervous but some people hide it better than others. People find others who are cool and accepting of their flaws admirable, and she most likely will as well, because everyone has flaws but some people are more accepting of themselves than others.

I am currently also struggling with this but it's possible to learn how to do it well enough to hide our social ineptitude.



The Grand Inquisitor
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13 Mar 2019, 7:45 am

She's obviously not interested. Best just to move on.



nick007
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13 Mar 2019, 9:32 am

Since she knows you like her, the ball is in her court so to speak. She'd let you know she likes you if she was interested.


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icehouselover1984
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15 Mar 2019, 11:54 pm

I feel that while the ball is kind of in her court, I should still continue with small talk with her to get to know her and she gets to know me/maybe feels more comfortable around me. It is just hard to find the right times to talk to her, and I get nervous easily when it comes to approaching her when she is with her friends.



Last edited by icehouselover1984 on 15 Mar 2019, 11:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

icehouselover1984
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Joined: 17 Jan 2019
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15 Mar 2019, 11:56 pm

nick007 wrote:
Since she knows you like her, the ball is in her court so to speak. She'd let you know she likes you if she was interested.


I feel that while the ball is kind of in her court, I should still continue with small talk with her to get to know her and she gets to know me/maybe feels more comfortable around me. It is just hard to find the right times to talk to her, and I get nervous easily when it comes to approaching her when she is with her friends.