"He's like a big kid." Is this how people think of us?

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kraftiekortie
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16 Apr 2019, 5:25 pm

I've made some stupid mistakes----and I'm still making them.

At least now I can see the mistakes, and try to rectify them.

My mother doesn't really think I'm "solid." She thinks I'm sort of the type that doesn't assert himself. And that I assert myself in the wrong places.



IsabellaLinton
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16 Apr 2019, 5:29 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I've made some stupid mistakes----and I'm still making them.

At least now I can see the mistakes, and try to rectify them.

My mother doesn't really think I'm "solid." She thinks I'm sort of the type that doesn't assert himself. And that I assert myself in the wrong places.


We all have difficulties with interpersonal communication, so it's difficult to assert ourselves when we need to. It's especially difficult to be assertive in person because we run the risk of having meltdowns. You're learning to express yourself in written form, which is therapeutic in its own right. Don't worry about the mistakes. We're all human. :heart:



kraftiekortie
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16 Apr 2019, 5:32 pm

Thanks. I appreciate all the nice things you're saying.



1stSauce
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17 Apr 2019, 7:22 am

I dislike the term "cute" being used in such a condescending, naive manner



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17 Apr 2019, 11:23 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
Hi:
I ran into a woman who works in another department which is two floors down below mine who works with another former friend of mine who is also on the spectrum. I asked her how he was doing and she proceeded to tell me about how he's "Like a big kid with his humor and his superheroes and that it's cute that he's writing a novel." When I talked to her, it sounded very phony.


Some people are being phony and some peoples mannerism and 'forced' smile makes them appear phony.

I agree that calling people cute or a big kid tends to be a mix of affection and condescension. I work with a lady on the spectrum who calls our boss cute for a number of reasons.

Some people are big kids and I'm one of them :-)



blazingstar
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17 Apr 2019, 5:56 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I've made some stupid mistakes----and I'm still making them.

At least now I can see the mistakes, and try to rectify them.

My mother doesn't really think I'm "solid." She thinks I'm sort of the type that doesn't assert himself. And that I assert myself in the wrong places.


Mothers frequently never see their offspring as grown up. :D


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green0star
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19 Apr 2019, 8:30 am

blazingstar wrote:
Mothers frequently never see their offspring as grown up. :D


Somehow this seems pretty true considering most parents generally always see their adult children as "children" and even more so if that adult child is autistic



Pepe
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20 Apr 2019, 2:23 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
People often think that I'm a "big kid."

It's a combination of affection and condescension that I sense in their attitude.

I don't know-----I just don't like acting all "professional" or whatever. I like acting like me.


I read somewhere that a part of the brain that develops in NTs doesn't in auties...
We tend to remain childlike which makes it easy for NT predators...
I don't pretend either...


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Fos11
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21 Apr 2019, 2:09 pm

It is because many autists do have "childish" interests. Many autists seem to be quite immature too. Especially the lower functioning autists. Of course not all autists are childish.