trying to figure out what it means to love

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Indeed, infatuation. The Polish word isn't so obscure.
You don't choose it but you can choose to follow it or not. This is where some reason can enter.
Like the question I always asked myself: are we capable of forming a healthy and stable long-term relationship? If the answer was no, I didn't give the infatuation a chance.
Why? Because I didn't want to hurt myself and others with unhealthy relationships and I knew I had huge capability of forming them.

Exactly. I can also decide if I want to keep an infatuation when it seems worthwhile or to let it die if it isn't.

That makes so much sense. English really fails with that.

I am initial stage and wish I had a word for that. We are no where near the deeper continuous state, so "I love you" is not appropriate yet.

It's liking / interested in him in English.

English is a rich language, check out its words count compared to other languages.

Nope, liking/interest can have very little to do with love yet.
Infatuation is the closest translation. But it has slightly wrong shade of meaning.
English has very rich vocabulary but poor word formation - in Slavic languages or e.g. Antient Greek you can easily make up a new word with meaning clear to everyone. English uses enormous set of existing words instead.