Is it normal for straight guys to pretend to be gay

Page 1 of 1 [ 9 posts ] 

TUF
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 10 Dec 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,464

21 Apr 2019, 1:16 pm

When we're at the pub, my stepdad makes comments about the looks of pretty young men on TV.

He's straight.

I'm not homophobic (seriously I'm bi myself) but I'm scared that someone else might be.

He isn't doing it for me because he's talking about 'my boy' and things like that.

Is it normal for straight guys to do that and is he going to run into problems doing that? I never know where my social anxiety is kicking in and where my autism is being naïve. He isn't diagnosed as autistic but he's incredibly socially naïve and just says whatever the first thing that pops into his head is.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

21 Apr 2019, 1:31 pm

There are straight guys who are confident enough to be able to see that another man can be “pretty.”

If you have a drunk idiot, the idiot might think he is gay, and be hostile to it.

But most folks wouldn’t really “mind.” They might “wonder” slightly, though.

In the old days, women were sometimes called “handsome,” too.



TUF
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 10 Dec 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,464

21 Apr 2019, 1:54 pm

Think I'll try to be less embarrassed then.

Nobody's drunk and pretty much everyone there is left wing so it's probably a safe space for that sort of comment.

It came about because I said guys online joke like that so he started joking like that which is funny, it's just if it spills into problems.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

21 Apr 2019, 2:06 pm

I wouldn’t do it in a biker pub, though.

Or some place that has skinheads in it (especially the racist sort).

If it’s a regular pub-type place, I feel like the folks there have a pretty good sense of humor, and wouldn’t mind in the least.



Sahn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jan 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,503
Location: UK

21 Apr 2019, 2:17 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I wouldn’t do it in a biker pub, though.

Or some place that has skinheads in it (especially the racist sort).

If it’s a regular pub-type place, I feel like the folks there have a pretty good sense of humor, and wouldn’t mind in the least.

Back in 2002, my Dad (who is gay) took me out to a pub in Brighton, it was a blatantly gay scene and most of the clientele were skinheads.



TUF
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 10 Dec 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,464

21 Apr 2019, 2:58 pm

Ah that's another reason to be a skinhead then.

Nah, we specifically go to a nice place, not that kind of place.

I suspect homophobes would be less welcome than gay guys. I'm just a bit nervous because fitting in means so much to me so I don't want to act controversial until people get to know me.



Sahn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jan 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,503
Location: UK

21 Apr 2019, 5:11 pm

TUF wrote:
Ah that's another reason to be a skinhead then.

Nah, we specifically go to a nice place, not that kind of place.

I suspect homophobes would be less welcome than gay guys. I'm just a bit nervous because fitting in means so much to me so I don't want to act controversial until people get to know me.

I found it confusing being surrounded by skinheads but its just an image that has been appropriated by a section of the gay community. They were perfectly nice, it's not like my dad would take me somewhere dodgy.



shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,754

21 Apr 2019, 6:16 pm

Define "normal"

"Normal" is rapidly changing

The world is a lot less homophobic than it used to be



blackicmenace
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Nov 2016
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,465
Location: Sagittarius A

21 Apr 2019, 6:24 pm

Sounds like he is secure about his sexuality.


_________________
Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.” ― Bertrand Russell