Nearly always envious or jealous of other people.

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I seem to wonder if I have a problem with envy or jealousy. I seem to feel it when I see other young people on social media especially other people with mild aspergers looking like they are always having a great time than and are better than me and envious of their careers and jobs, envious of their friends, envious and missing out on the exciting places they go to for the day or on holiday, envious of them having boyfriends or girlfriends. I do sometimes think I try to compare myself to other NTs around me.
I don't know how can overcome these thoughts. I do seem to think that to everyone on social media that I am just a boring, weird sore loser, I mean few people on it talk to me and people unfriend me due to the fact that I used to post negative statuses about my frustrations and rants as a way of getting people to talk to me and understand me. Maybe it was indeed for seeking attention. I don't use social media for anything else apart from scrolling through it and that's it.
I do find it quite hard to try to show a bit of appreciation for these people sometimes, because the envy will at times depending what it is, boil over. And I know that if I was one of those people there maybe someone out there jealous of my life without realising sometimes. I find it hard to take in words told to me like 'You are not alone', and 'No one is perfect'.

Social media isn't real - most people just edit what they put on there.

I don't have advice for never being jealous of others. As someone who isn't even allowed to work, I feel it a lot. Like people are judging me for not having a job or a visible disability.

But remember, people tend to hide the hard times they're having. I used to feel a lot of jealousy until I started getting to know people better. That perfect cousin of mine? She had anxiety issues and was jealous of me because I'm clever. Other people had their own struggles. Even celebrities - a lot of celebrities suffer from mental illnesses.

I'm not trying to suggest schadenfreude, if that's how it comes across. Just try not to compare your insides to other people's outsides.

Think about what you are trying to do

Goal, job, hobby, friends

Jealousy is not tabboo, but put more emphasis on worrying about what you are doing and concern yourself less about other people


A lot of the time I get jealous

Skinny smart handsome cisgender neurotypical white man


Jealousy is not the enemy

Jealousy is not bad or wrong



But jealousy is grossly out of proportion

Chris: I dunno how to answer you honestly. I wanna say that my feelings of jealousy/envy are in the past and that I've matured, grown a thicker skin or wtf ever. The other posters are right, you don't know another person till you've walked in her/his shoes and lived or at least listened to their struggles. I am slowly coming to accept that, more or less.

Nonetheless, despite the fact that many people have it worse off than me, I have plenty of my own s**t to deal with in life and being a now middle-aged, single dude w/few friends, no family or pet (can't afford one for now) and no romantic prospects on the horizon does not make it any easier. Quite to the contrary. And I emphasize THOSE social supports b/c they play a central role in making most people happy, both as people you can share your struggles with and as people you can do things in life with that you wanna do. And yes, most people I know (despite their own problems) are not as isolated (by choice) as I am and yes I guess that still breeds feelings of envy or whatever in me. Frankly, I can't help that. It's possible that the CBT I've just started will help me, and I know I have to give it time. But the fact is (no matter what others say) that for now, it's very hard dealing w/life's crap when your own life isn't on track and yes, even objectively and taking into consideration others' own problems, the grass in many cases simply is greener on the other side.

People for the most part portray only the best aspects of their lives in social media. You live your own life, so you know what troubles you and what not a you get out of life, but you don't know what troubles others. You only ever see them posting about the good times generally, so you can't have any idea what demons they're reckoning with.

In relation to being envious of others, the best advice I can give is to look at what's working for them and try to implement it into your life where possible

it is always all too easy to ignore or forget about the people who see our lives as their fairy tale.

Sometimes what works for them only hinders you


Their situation is different from yours