Page 1 of 2 [ 17 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

treefiddy
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2019
Age: 350
Gender: Female
Posts: 172
Location: Nowhere/Now

15 May 2019, 9:40 am

Not sure if this is the best place to post, but I thought it would be interesting.

I've seen several therapists in my life for many different reasons and all have been very different from one another.

My current therapist is an old Freudian type; a psychoanalyst. He has a really nice smile, but will only smile no more than 4 times in each session; the rest of the time he looks at me intensely, as though trying to solve a puzzle. I find the whole thing really amusing and have developed a good relationship with him over time.

Describe your therapist - what are they like? What's their preferred therapeutic approach? Is there anything specific you like/dislike about them/their approach?


_________________
Кто сгорел, того не подожжешь.


Twilightprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,853

15 May 2019, 10:28 am

My therapist does CBT. It’s pretty practical stuff. She’s struggled with anxiety, some sensory issues, and has had disordered eating tendencies herself, so she really knows what she’s talking about in these areas. She also has a lot of experience with spiritual abuse which has been good for me.

She’s gotten me into yoga and has offered a lot of practical suggestions that have been good for me.

I feel like I should be progressing more than I am, though, so I’ve been considering seeing someone else. I’ve been avoiding talking about specific issues and have only been staying in my comfort zone, but I probably need to talk about the things that make me uncomfortable more. Maybe she needs to push me more. I don’t know.



treefiddy
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2019
Age: 350
Gender: Female
Posts: 172
Location: Nowhere/Now

15 May 2019, 11:45 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
My therapist does CBT. It’s pretty practical stuff. She’s struggled with anxiety, some sensory issues, and has had disordered eating tendencies herself, so she really knows what she’s talking about in these areas. She also has a lot of experience with spiritual abuse which has been good for me.

She’s gotten me into yoga and has offered a lot of practical suggestions that have been good for me.

I feel like I should be progressing more than I am, though, so I’ve been considering seeing someone else. I’ve been avoiding talking about specific issues and have only been staying in my comfort zone, but I probably need to talk about the things that make me uncomfortable more. Maybe she needs to push me more. I don’t know.


Thank you for sharing :)

I do think the problem with seeing any therapist is that after a while you develop a relationship with them that almost feels like a weird sort of friendship and you don't want that person to think badly of you/change their mind about you if you share some difficult truths.
Do you feel like your therapist talks enough during the sessions? (Asking questions, offering insights etc) Or do you feel like she lets you talk for most of it? Just wondering because I was unhappy with some of my previous therapists as I felt that I would talk for 95% of the session (not because I didn't let them talk, but because they just stayed quiet and I felt pressured to fill the silences), but with my current therapist I talk for about 60% of the time and the other 40% he questions and challenges me (e.g. "why do you think you feel that way?" "is there perhaps an ulterior motive to this action of yours?" etc), which I think is good.

Your therapist sounds lovely, but I do think that there has to be a good balance between the therapist making you feel comfortable & understood and also challenging you and taking you out of your comfort zone, as you say.
If you decide she's not challenging enough, it may be worth interviewing others to see if you can find someone who can help you make more progress. Like I said, I've seen lots of therapists in my time and whilst they were all well meaning, some were definitely better than others.


_________________
Кто сгорел, того не подожжешь.


Twilightprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,853

15 May 2019, 11:50 am

treefiddy wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
My therapist does CBT. It’s pretty practical stuff. She’s struggled with anxiety, some sensory issues, and has had disordered eating tendencies herself, so she really knows what she’s talking about in these areas. She also has a lot of experience with spiritual abuse which has been good for me.

She’s gotten me into yoga and has offered a lot of practical suggestions that have been good for me.

I feel like I should be progressing more than I am, though, so I’ve been considering seeing someone else. I’ve been avoiding talking about specific issues and have only been staying in my comfort zone, but I probably need to talk about the things that make me uncomfortable more. Maybe she needs to push me more. I don’t know.


Thank you for sharing :)

I do think the problem with seeing any therapist is that after a while you develop a relationship with them that almost feels like a weird sort of friendship and you don't want that person to think badly of you/change their mind about you if you share some difficult truths.
Do you feel like your therapist talks enough during the sessions? (Asking questions, offering insights etc) Or do you feel like she lets you talk for most of it? Just wondering because I was unhappy with some of my previous therapists as I felt that I would talk for 95% of the session (not because I didn't let them talk, but because they just stayed quiet and I felt pressured to fill the silences), but with my current therapist I talk for about 60% of the time and the other 40% he questions and challenges me (e.g. "why do you think you feel that way?" "is there perhaps an ulterior motive to this action of yours?" etc), which I think is good.

Your therapist sounds lovely, but I do think that there has to be a good balance between the therapist making you feel comfortable & understood and also challenging you and taking you out of your comfort zone, as you say.
If you decide she's not challenging enough, it may be worth interviewing others to see if you can find someone who can help you make more progress. Like I said, I've seen lots of therapists in my time and whilst they were all well meaning, some were definitely better than others.


She talks more than I do, for sure.

During one session, she said that we were both practicing avoidance by avoiding certain subjects and nothing has changed since she said that. LOL

It’s like we’ve both settled on talking about things that we’re comfortable with. Some of the problem is probably that I get embarrassed easily.



treefiddy
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2019
Age: 350
Gender: Female
Posts: 172
Location: Nowhere/Now

15 May 2019, 12:08 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
She talks more than I do, for sure.

During one session, she said that we were both practicing avoidance by avoiding certain subjects and nothing has changed since she said that. LOL

It’s like we’ve both settled on talking about things that we’re comfortable with. Some of the problem is probably that I get embarrassed easily.


Oh no, that sounds really tough; I can relate. Maybe you should focus on discussing the fact that you get embarrassed easily without actually talking about anything embarrassing? Maybe you have already, but it might be worth really focusing on it full force, sort of speak, because you being able to get past the embarrassment is probably crucial to you being able to step out of your comfort zone.


_________________
Кто сгорел, того не подожжешь.


Twilightprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,853

15 May 2019, 1:11 pm

treefiddy wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
She talks more than I do, for sure.

During one session, she said that we were both practicing avoidance by avoiding certain subjects and nothing has changed since she said that. LOL

It’s like we’ve both settled on talking about things that we’re comfortable with. Some of the problem is probably that I get embarrassed easily.


Oh no, that sounds really tough; I can relate. Maybe you should focus on discussing the fact that you get embarrassed easily without actually talking about anything embarrassing? Maybe you have already, but it might be worth really focusing on it full force, sort of speak, because you being able to get past the embarrassment is probably crucial to you being able to step out of your comfort zone.


I probably should.

I get embarrassed over things that shouldn’t be embarrassing.



treefiddy
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2019
Age: 350
Gender: Female
Posts: 172
Location: Nowhere/Now

15 May 2019, 3:31 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
I get embarrassed over things that shouldn’t be embarrassing.


That sucks :( it's really good that you're doing CBT though; that's perfect for reprogramming your mind. I definitely think it's worth focusing on this issue, as I can imagine how much it could be preventing you from being open about certain things, even when you want to be. Hopefully the CBT can help you to gradually let go of the fear of embarrassment. I had a CBT therapist back in the day too and it helped me a lot :)


_________________
Кто сгорел, того не подожжешь.


AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,499

18 May 2019, 3:26 pm

She's very rational yet sympathetic. She helps me get out of my head a lot and gives me perspective over my irrational beliefs and thoughts. She's very sympathetic and objective.



Twilightprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,853

18 May 2019, 4:02 pm

AprilR wrote:
She's very rational yet sympathetic. She helps me get out of my head a lot and gives me perspective over my irrational beliefs and thoughts. She's very sympathetic and objective.


Sympathy is a very important trait for a therapist to have. I had a couple that were somewhat lacking in this regard, so I didn’t really connect with them. When a therapist is sympathetic, it validates the client’s feelings which is super important!



treefiddy
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2019
Age: 350
Gender: Female
Posts: 172
Location: Nowhere/Now

18 May 2019, 4:04 pm

AprilR wrote:
She's very rational yet sympathetic. She helps me get out of my head a lot and gives me perspective over my irrational beliefs and thoughts. She's very sympathetic and objective.


Sounds like the perfect therapist by my definition : )

Twilightprincess wrote:
When a therapist is sympathetic, it validates the client’s feelings which is super important!


100% agree with this!


_________________
Кто сгорел, того не подожжешь.


jimmy m
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jun 2018
Age: 70
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,003
Location: Indiana

18 May 2019, 7:11 pm

That is an easy question. I never had a therapist. I am old school.



IsabellaLinton
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 23,092
Location: In a Book

18 May 2019, 7:21 pm

Trauma Psychologist for C-PTSD
Over eighty year old professor
Holocaust victim / survivor / specialist
Wrote PhD on Complex Trauma in concentration camp survivors, and counselled victims
I used to sit under his desk because I was too afraid to come out
He arranged for my PTSD service dog
We've had a very tight bond for ten years
We've spent thousands of hours together, from his office to shopping malls (for exposure therapy)
He loves "1950's Black Music" (his term)
He makes me dance to Little Richard with him when I'm stressed :P
He swears and laughs but pushes me to my limits with grace
He falls asleep sometimes in session because of illness :(
He can't write because of illness so I write my own receipts and appointments, etc
He reminds me of the professor from "Tuesdays with Morrie"
He's been the most influential person in my life, ever
I want to cry now because I miss him

ASD Psychotherapist:
She is an autism specialist who works with my ASD assessment doctor
I've only seen her three times
She's very kind and very knowledgeable about ASD / SPD / OT referrals / co-morbids
I like her but I'm still a little shy
I do not respond to CBT, so we are using DBT currently


:heart:



shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,117

18 May 2019, 10:37 pm

Last year, finished two years with Jeanne Courtney

Cognitive behavioral therapy

She was not obsessed with the Mandated Reporter law. :twisted: by far, the most important thing :evil:

She did not shake my hand

She almost never offered advice

And when she did it was small:. Listen to podcasts, go to Cafe, go for walk

She seemed grounded

She was indulgent and :lol: buddy buddy :roll:



Until I correctly told her that "mad" is not an emotion

Then , cross examination and CIA interrogation


She exaggerated things she thought I did that were good ("you were like Rosa parks)

She exaggerated the bad things she thought other people did



Drama queen


Everything was a soap opera


She did not make comments about my appearance, IQ, or personality


:oops: other counselors did :roll:



treefiddy
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2019
Age: 350
Gender: Female
Posts: 172
Location: Nowhere/Now

19 May 2019, 6:40 am

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Trauma Psychologist for C-PTSD
Over eighty year old professor
Holocaust victim / survivor / specialist
Wrote PhD on Complex Trauma in concentration camp survivors, and counselled victims
I used to sit under his desk because I was too afraid to come out
He arranged for my PTSD service dog
We've had a very tight bond for ten years
We've spent thousands of hours together, from his office to shopping malls (for exposure therapy)
He loves "1950's Black Music" (his term)
He makes me dance to Little Richard with him when I'm stressed :P
He swears and laughs but pushes me to my limits with grace
He falls asleep sometimes in session because of illness :(
He can't write because of illness so I write my own receipts and appointments, etc
He reminds me of the professor from "Tuesdays with Morrie"
He's been the most influential person in my life, ever
I want to cry now because I miss him


:cry: that is so moving. Sounds like it was a beautiful relationship.


_________________
Кто сгорел, того не подожжешь.


treefiddy
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2019
Age: 350
Gender: Female
Posts: 172
Location: Nowhere/Now

19 May 2019, 6:42 am

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
She exaggerated things she thought I did that were good ("you were like Rosa parks)

She exaggerated the bad things she thought other people did


Drama queen


Everything was a soap opera


Sounds like she needed a therapist herself


_________________
Кто сгорел, того не подожжешь.