You May Be NT (Whatever it means) If...

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You Might Be Neurotypical If:

• every group you join is led by people of your neurotype, and no one else seems concerned.

• everyone pays attention when it is your turn to say something.

• in your exeprience, bullying was something that only happened to someone else, and only because they somehow deserved it.

• most people who make the laws of your nation share your neurotype, and no one else seems concerned.

• multitasking is your greatest talent.

• no one has ever seriously blamed you for being bullied.

• no one is ever surprised when you present a good idea.

• no one is ever surprised when you speak articulately and intelligently.

• people just like you are represented in the media and pop culture.

• people laugh at your jokes and not at you.

• people reward you when you act quirky instead of suggesting that something might be wrong with you.

• people see your life as worth living.

• people understand why you get upset without having to ask you.

• public assistance is a matter of choice for you, not a necessity of life.

• public transportation is a matter of choice for you, not a necessity of life.

• you are completely unaware of your neurotypical nature.

• you are in control of your life.

• you are suspicious of anyone who does not make eye contact with you.

• you believe anyone complaining about an 'invisible' disorder (i.e., autism, depression, migrains, et cetera) is either over-reacting or deliberately faking it.

• you believe every weird or socially awkward person is 'autistic', 'ret*d' or 'insane'.

• you blame all of a person's struggles on their autism, whether they have autism or not.

• you buy things you do not need with money you do not have to impress people you do not know.

• you communicate regularly in analogies, inside jokes, metaphors and cultural references.

• you feel threatened by people who are 'different' from you.

• you get along well with your parents, your teachers, and with other people in authority.

• you have a strong sense of what is fashionable and what is not fashionable.

• you never worry about law enforcement questioning you for acting in a suspicious manner.

• you use the words 'autistic', 'insane', and 'ret*d' interchangeably.

• your musical tastes can be summed up in three words: 'LOUD', 'LOUDER' and 'LOUDEST'.

You expect autistics to read your mind but you tell autistics that you cannot read their minds, then twist it around to make it look like only autistics lack empathy.

If you feel you simply have to leave home or your city as soon and possible, never looking back, then boomerang back home anyway after a failed marriage or attempt to go it alone. Many NTs leave home equipped with no more everyday living skills than many people with ASDs, yet they have a feeling of superiority to them. It comes to bite them, unfortunately very hard sometimes.

When shopping for new bedding, you can find something quickly based solely on the colour or style. You can shop online because you don't have to touch the fabric first. You aren't horrified by texture (ruffles, pleats, tassels, embroidery, lace, rough fabric, quilting, ruching, gathering, thick seams, heavy stitching, fuzziness, flannel, linen, etc.), you don't have to smell it first, and you don't have to flap it about in a shop to make sure it isn't noisy. The weight of your bedding is irrelevant. Your senses don't matter at all, if you like the colour.

You know you're NT if...


* When you were growing up, your family (the adults, that is) loved you just because you were their child, rather than for your docile behavior and the good grades you got at school.

* You knew what kind of lunch to bring to school in order to win your classmates' respect (e.g. Lunchables), without anyone explaining to you what's cool and what's not. Double points if you easily persuaded your parents to let you bring that lunch.

* (men only) Your first girlfriend was someone you were actually attracted to, rather than the first girl you settled with just because she showed interest in you.

* When you see someone, especially a man, walking alone on the sidewalk, and you're driving, you feel a strong urge to scream an insult at that person, and only strong willpower helps overcome it. Sometimes, not even that.

* You instantly picked up on the office politics at your first job, while being a 22-year-old mail room person and mostly working alone. Quadruple points if you had sex in your building without losing your job.

* You lost count of the hookups you had, let alone how many dates you went on, even though you're excellent with faces and names.

* When your most of your friends settled down and got married, you did too, conveniently ignoring how unpleasant your life will become as a result.

You do not feel like aliens from another planet abandoned you on earth.

You and most people in the group you identify with
1. Agree your group is a thing
2. Constantly feel the need to say their group does not define them.
3. Do not believe the group they identify with is by definition is flawed or broken even if it is a discriminated against minority.

The group you identify with is not labeled a diagnosable disorder.

There is not a “gold standard” behavioral treatment for your group.

It is not recommended there be a early intervention as possible for your group.

Huge amount of resources are not spent to find said interventions or discovery of your genetics so you can be aborted.

Society does not feel the need to create “inspiration porn” about you.

There might be stereotypes of ret*d about your group or savant but not both.

Your group is not used by defense lawyers to reduce the sentence for the crime you committed.

The existence of your group is not blamed on vaccine injury.

You May Be Neurotypical If:

• people assume you know what you are talking about on any given subject, and rarely (if ever) ask for proof to back up your claims.

• people tell you that you are interesting and fun to be with.

• strangers are attracted to you.

• strangers want to take 'selfies' with you.

• when you need to return to your parents' home after having been on your own for a while, your parents see it as more of a blessing than a curse.

• you perceive the world as a nice place full of friendly, attentive people.

• your first date was with someone who was actually attracted to you, rather than someone who merely felt sorry for you (e.g., a "Pity Date").

You don't anticipate that your old age will be as lonely as your teen years were chaotic and you anticipate that you will have someone to grow old with.

You May Be Neurotypical If:

• employers are quick to hire you; you are rarely out of work for more than a week.

• employers hire and promote you over those geeky quants who have only technical skills.

You actually put your university education to good use in a field of study that is actually useful.

I read an article ranking my major, English, as the most useless in real life terms. That was a real sock in the gut to read.

You get commended on your actual skill, not for your "courage," "bravery," "kindness," or some other empty platitude.

You have an actual skill that is useful to someone.

(These are the NTs with intelligence, not the ignorant, superficial types).

They put their skills to use and give valuable knowledge.

You May Be Neurotypical If:

• you and your coworkers agree that you are not the best at what you were hired to do, but your career thrives anyway.

• you see someone has compiled a list of "You May Be..." entries and all you can ask is "Why?"

You see a group of your colleagues chatting and you go over to them to join in, without the fear of them accusing you of being nosy or intrusive.

You think autism means Rain Man (unless you know people with autism who are not like Rain Man)

You May Be Neurotypical If:

• if someone of your neurotype can do something well, you will not be punished for being unable to do the same thing just as well.

• If someone touches you non-sexually and non-violently without permission, it may annoy you but will not hinder your ability to function in any way.

• if you are murdered, your murderer will not be given a light sentence because of the stress caused by interacting with you.

• if you are murdered, your murderer will not be let off because your murder was deemed "an act of mercy".

• if you are not feeling well and decide to stay in bed, you will likely be believed and not scolded.

• if you display a strong emotion, you are more likely to receive empathy than for people to dismiss your emotion as "not real" due to your neurotype.

• If you feel stressed daily or near-daily, you can be sure that most of the people you know will understand and not mistake stress for threatening behavior.

• if you have a negative trait such as carelessness or selfishness, it will not be attributed to your neurotype.

• people do not assume that living in the same household with you is inherently "tragic" or "devastating", or that your family, friends and partner will need a support group to deal with living with you.

• people who are like you in the way they think, and experience emotion are not automatically treated as dangerous or broken due to their neurotype.

• people with your neurotype are shown in the Media as being desirable for romantic and familial relationships.

• when prospective parents and others speak of wanting a "healthy child", you know that they mean a child with your neurotype.

• when someone says that someone else seems like you, that is never taken as an insult.

• when you want to avoid an activity that you don’t like, nobody tries to talk you into it or tell you to "just deal with it".

• whether you are asexual or promiscuous, it is never attributed to your neurotype.

• you can leave your house any time you are physically up for it, without having to consider the effects on your neurotype.

• you can share your life with an animal companion without your ability to care for them being called into question due to your neurotype.

• you do not have to avoid certain movies or shows because exposure to them will hinder your ability to function in any way.

• you do not have to disclose your neurotype to explain your behavior, needs, or emotions, because people already think they make sense.

• you do not have to fear being locked up "for your own good".

• you do not have to fear being preyed upon due to your neurotype.

• you do not have to keep silent about your neurotype for fear of losing your job.

• you do not have to worry about potential triggers at social events or prepare a contingency plan for what happens if you are put in a state of being unable to function.

• you do not have to worry that if your house is messy, people will take it as evidence that you should be locked up or have your legal rights taken away.

• you do not have to worry that people are attracted to you due to their perception that your neurotype will make you easier to control.

• you do not have to worry that you neurotype will be used as a reason not to hire you.

• you do not have to worry that you will be fired due to your neurotype causing you to miss work.

• you do not have to worry that your neurotype will be a barrier to having or adopting children or keeping custody of the children you already have.

• you do not have to worry that your neurotype will lead to people disliking you.

• you do not have to worry that your neurotype will make you unable to do household chores.

• you do not need deadline extensions, alternate assignments, or other accommodations due to your neurotype.

• you know your legal protections, your civil rights, or your freedom will not be taken away due to your neurotype.

• you never have to worry that your neurotype will be used to invalidate any argument you make.