Can you look up people from the past?

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QFT
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28 Jun 2019, 2:16 am

Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me. I was just trying to give her one word answers so that I could go home and eat that thing I was buying as quick as possible. Then, in 2005-ish I had similar experience in Jimmy Jones.

Anyway, I regret the way I totally blew off those two girls since looking back they were trying to talk to me repeatedly, over and over. SO maybe I had a decent chance with them which doesn't happen that often. So this brings me to the question I was going to ask. Is there a way to look up the people in the past that used to work at a certain place -- if I know the exact location of that place? I know if I were to look up people that are there "today" it would be easy since today everything is computerised. But what about the past?

I mean, I was able to watch TV from the past on youtube -- in particular I could watch Soviet news from 1979 and 1975:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpHquLgIK7Y
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FhKPao1ray8
So if I could watch the news on youtube from the time when youtube didn't even exist, maybe its also possible to find out who used to work at a certain place?

I guess the chances are both girls are probably married by now. But you never know. I mean I am still single, maybe they are single too? Or even if they are married, at least I would like to catch up with them and let them know that I am thinking of them -- so I didn't totally ignore them after all? I just feel very lonely and ostracized right now, and I totally miss that positive attention I used to be getting from them.



Dan82
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28 Jun 2019, 2:51 am

I'm sure the IRS or somebody keeps track of who worked where when, but I really think the most likely scenario if you could access that information somehow would be the girls would be really creeped out by it.



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28 Jun 2019, 5:14 am

QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


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QFT
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28 Jun 2019, 5:16 am

RetroGamer87 wrote:
QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


Did you read the year 2002? And now it is 2019? How can it possibly be "too soon"? It is too LATE -- not soon. But I am desperate in going back to the past.



Luhluhluh
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28 Jun 2019, 5:26 am

QFT wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


Did you read the year 2002? And now it is 2019? How can it possibly be "too soon"? It is too LATE -- not soon. But I am desperate in going back to the past.


I don't think there's much luck of finding someone from 17 years ago. Maybe the better option is to notice NOW when someone tries to talk to you. Learn from the past but don't try to go there.


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QFT
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28 Jun 2019, 5:29 am

Luhluhluh wrote:
QFT wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


Did you read the year 2002? And now it is 2019? How can it possibly be "too soon"? It is too LATE -- not soon. But I am desperate in going back to the past.


I don't think there's much luck of finding someone from 17 years ago. Maybe the better option is to notice NOW when someone tries to talk to you. Learn from the past but don't try to go there.


Nobody tries to talk to me now since I am not that young any more. I was born at the end of 1979, so right now I am 39, back then I was 22.



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28 Jun 2019, 5:38 am

RetroGamer87 wrote:
QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


Sorry. Your comment made me chuckle. I don't think you noticed the dates. :lol:

I too have had many similar situations. No idea what to do myself. :(


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Luhluhluh
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28 Jun 2019, 5:42 am

QFT wrote:
Luhluhluh wrote:
QFT wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


Did you read the year 2002? And now it is 2019? How can it possibly be "too soon"? It is too LATE -- not soon. But I am desperate in going back to the past.


I don't think there's much luck of finding someone from 17 years ago. Maybe the better option is to notice NOW when someone tries to talk to you. Learn from the past but don't try to go there.


Nobody tries to talk to me now since I am not that young any more. I was born at the end of 1979, so right now I am 39, back then I was 22.


So then you could make an effort to talk to people. But there's no sense in trying to look someone up from 17 years ago. It's likely she would not even remember you, and it would come across as weird anyway.


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QFT
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28 Jun 2019, 5:48 am

Luhluhluh wrote:
QFT wrote:
Luhluhluh wrote:
QFT wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


Did you read the year 2002? And now it is 2019? How can it possibly be "too soon"? It is too LATE -- not soon. But I am desperate in going back to the past.


I don't think there's much luck of finding someone from 17 years ago. Maybe the better option is to notice NOW when someone tries to talk to you. Learn from the past but don't try to go there.


Nobody tries to talk to me now since I am not that young any more. I was born at the end of 1979, so right now I am 39, back then I was 22.


So then you could make an effort to talk to people. But there's no sense in trying to look someone up from 17 years ago. It's likely she would not even remember you, and it would come across as weird anyway.


I don't want to make an effort to talk to people cause it ruins the whole point: I want to feel WANTED and LIKED. When others talk to me first, thats what makes me feel that way. And what you just wrote confirms my point: you suggested it in a response to my saying people don't like me any more. See? And that is precisely why I don't want to do it.

On a different note, I don't know how to talk to people anyway. So even if you were to somehow persuade me its a good idea, well where exactly would I start? What exact topic am I supposed to bring up to a complete stranger? I have no clue.

But you see, if only I were to respond to those girls, I won't have to do any of it. Thats why I resent so much the fact that I didn't respond to them.



Luhluhluh
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28 Jun 2019, 5:52 am

QFT wrote:

I don't want to make an effort to talk to people cause it ruins the whole point: I want to feel WANTED and LIKED. When others talk to me first, thats what makes me feel that way.



Okay but here's the thing... THE OTHER PERSON WANTS TO FEEL WANTED AND LIKED TOO. So by you not speaking to anyone, that other person on the other side gets the impression that you don't care and you're not interested.

That's how human beings show interest... they speak to one another. And you not speaking is showing them that you're not interested.


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QFT
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28 Jun 2019, 5:56 am

Luhluhluh wrote:
QFT wrote:

I don't want to make an effort to talk to people cause it ruins the whole point: I want to feel WANTED and LIKED. When others talk to me first, thats what makes me feel that way.



Okay but here's the thing... THE OTHER PERSON WANTS TO FEEL WANTED AND LIKED TOO. So by you not speaking to anyone, that other person on the other side gets the impression that you don't care and you're not interested.

That's how human beings show interest... they speak to one another. And you not speaking is showing them that you're not interested.


I am a lot more starved of feeling liked than they are. If things are symmetric, then half the time its me who starts a conversation and half the time its them. So the question is: where is THEIR half? When was the last time someone approached me? Maybe if people were to approach me more often I would get a courage to approach them too. But when nobody approaches me it leads me to feel like nobody likes me, hence my shyness.



Luhluhluh
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28 Jun 2019, 6:07 am

QFT wrote:
Luhluhluh wrote:
QFT wrote:

I don't want to make an effort to talk to people cause it ruins the whole point: I want to feel WANTED and LIKED. When others talk to me first, thats what makes me feel that way.



Okay but here's the thing... THE OTHER PERSON WANTS TO FEEL WANTED AND LIKED TOO. So by you not speaking to anyone, that other person on the other side gets the impression that you don't care and you're not interested.

That's how human beings show interest... they speak to one another. And you not speaking is showing them that you're not interested.


I am a lot more starved of feeling liked than they are. If things are symmetric, then half the time its me who starts a conversation and half the time its them. So the question is: where is THEIR half? When was the last time someone approached me? Maybe if people were to approach me more often I would get a courage to approach them too. But when nobody approaches me it leads me to feel like nobody likes me, hence my shyness.


You can't read minds so you would not know how another person feels. For all you know, that other person feels just as starved of attention as you do.

If you don't want to make an effort, fair enough. But the logical outcome of that decision is that you will have to continue to wait for someone to come along and make the initial effort.


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TheOther
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28 Jun 2019, 10:20 am

I see the desire to look people up like this, however I don't think it is a good solution to your problem. If you looked these people up and tracked them down, they would see you as a weird stalker.

The sad truth is that these moments are fleeting, and opportunities do disappear when they are missed. I think you would better spend your time learning the signs that someone might be interested so you don't miss the next one.



kraftiekortie
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28 Jun 2019, 10:22 am

My first love...from 1978.....I wish I could contact-----but I'm just afraid to.

The candle has burned for her since 1978.



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29 Jun 2019, 3:19 am

QFT wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
QFT wrote:
Back in 2002 I had a habbit of studying really late -- till like 1 AM -- and then going to the store that was still open that late to buy some food I would eat at home before I jump into bed. So the female cashier, who was about my age, kept trying to chat me up, but it never crossed my mind that maybe she liked me.

It's a good sign that she's expressed interest in you but play it cool. Don't return her affections too soon or you'll seem desperate.


Did you read the year 2002? And now it is 2019? How can it possibly be "too soon"? It is too LATE -- not soon. But I am desperate in going back to the past.


Yes I read the year. I was joking mate.


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29 Jun 2019, 4:10 am


rogers and hammerstein knew the deal.

If I loved you, time and again
I would try to say all I'd want you to know
If I loved you, words wouldn't come
In an easy way, round in circles I'd go

Longing to tell you but afraid and shy
I'd let my golden chances pass me by
Soon you'd leave me
Off you would go in the mist of day
Never, never to know

How I love you, if I loved you

:cry: :cry: :cry: