Do you feel like a piece of u is missing because of Aspegers

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Mona Pereth
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16 Jul 2019, 10:30 pm

Anyhow, to answer the original question: No, I don't feel like I have a missing piece. Partly this is because I'm one of the relatively lucky ones for whom autism comes with abilities as well as disabilities. Also I've had a lifelong strategy of seeking out fellow oddballs rather than trying to fit in with the mainstream.


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Benjamin the Donkey
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16 Jul 2019, 10:53 pm

In terms of what's considered "normal, " I probably do have a few missing pieces. But from my perspective, most NT people also have some missing pieces, and that's what often makes dealing with them so frustrating.


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IsabellaLinton
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16 Jul 2019, 11:04 pm

I have never thought of my autistic qualities as "missing pieces". In contrast, I feel like I have "extra pieces", such as my synaesthesia, my sensory issues, my need to stim, my need to be alone and my intense special interests. I wouldn't know life any differently than through my own eyes, and I wouldn't want to change or discard my core self to be different at all.



KanyeWestFan
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17 Jul 2019, 12:20 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
KanyeWestFan wrote:
I have no problem with having Aspergers but when I think about how I never had legit friendships or my lack of memories to look back on fondly. I feel empty, I feel like less of a person. Of course, I am only 21 so my life is far from over but I still automatically have those feelings.

What are your hobbies/interests?

Have you gotten to know any other autistic people in your local area? (As an autistic person yourself, you might find it easier to make friends with other autistic people -- or at least some other autistic people -- than with NT's, although making friends with fellow autistic people may be a slower process than the way NT's make friends with each other.)



My biggest hobby/interest is music and I am currently trying to get into music in hopes of a better life. I also tried to look for other autistic people but I live in a small town. I can try again though



Mona Pereth
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17 Jul 2019, 1:27 am

KanyeWestFan wrote:
My biggest hobby/interest is music and I am currently trying to get into music in hopes of a better life. I also tried to look for other autistic people but I live in a small town. I can try again though

If you don't mind sharing this info, what is the nearest major metropolitan area to where you live? There might be an ASD adult support group in the nearest major city.

Alternatively, if you were to include your nearest major metropolitan area in your profile, you might attract attention from some fellow WP users who live in the same area.


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auntblabby
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17 Jul 2019, 2:03 am

i feel that the fully functioning facial and vocal recognition modules are missing from my brain. other than that, it seems to me that i was assembled out of irregular, cast-off parts at the last minute and with less than necessary precision. i function but not properly.



Rainbow_Belle
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17 Jul 2019, 3:10 am

Having few or no friends and being constantly rejected by society totally sucks.



auntblabby
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17 Jul 2019, 3:49 am

Rainbow_Belle wrote:
Having few or no friends and being constantly rejected by society totally sucks.

then it is time to reject society in turn, and make your own way and go there. :idea: :alien:



Joe90
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17 Jul 2019, 3:57 am

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What kind of neighborhood do you live in? Do you live in a neighborhood with just one dominant ethnic group?

If so, I would suggest moving to a neighborhood where there are lots of immigrants from many different cultures all over the world. You won't "fit in" there, either, because there's nothing to fit in to, but the people there are likely to be much friendlier overall, less likely to look down on you, and you won't be an outcast.


I live in a city, where there are literally people of every type of group. There are a lot of foreigners here, as well as Brits like myself, and there are rich people, homeless people, chavvy people, stuck-up people, disabled people...you name it there's every group you can imagine. The UK is multicultural nowadays anyway. But I get this treatment wherever I go. I hate it. It ruins my self-esteem.

And no, I'm not a fan of meeting people off the internet. Don't take it personally, I'm sure the vast majority of you here are genuine, but I'd rather keep anonymous here.
I like NTs, and I seem to be naturally interested in them, but the fear of social rejection knocks me back. I do have a couple of non-NT friends that I meet up with every now and then. But being so I'm a sociable person, I desire to get close to people my age at work too.


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KT67
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17 Jul 2019, 4:01 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
KT67 wrote:
What's sad is simply that the system doesn't allow me to make use of my talents within the capitalist framework. Because jobs require interviews and I lack the skill to do them well. Self employment requires advertising skills and same.

But I don't think an NT who'd been drawing for as little time as I've been drawing would be able to have the patience/attention to detail to draw the picture I'm drawing right now. I don't think they'd be as good at cataloguing books etc.

They'd be better at social things, sure, but social things aren't everything.

This is why we need Autistic-friendly workplaces where, among other things, the hiring process would put more emphasis on tests of skill than on an interview.


Yes!

I'm not as trained in STEM as some aspies are but I am trained in information studies and it did include knowing programming languages. Even the computer jobs ask for 'people skills'.

Why? I don't get it. Or for cataloguing books. Just seems a way to get rid of aspies.



IstominFan
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17 Jul 2019, 8:39 am

I have a lot of friends now, and varied activities, but I don't think I will ever date, let alone get married. My emergence into the world came too late and everyone is spoken for. I will just have to enjoy life, even if it does mean sometimes being on the sidelines.



Claradoon
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17 Jul 2019, 8:14 pm

No, I've always felt that something's missing in NTs. How can they possibly live in a world without sensitivities? I usually chalk this up to perception but there's reaction too. I remember one day seeing a beautiful rainbow downtown among the tall buildings, reaching clear down to the street from the sky. People looked to see what I was staring at, noticed the rainbow, said "Ah!" and kept going with their babbling. They just don't get it.



auntblabby
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17 Jul 2019, 8:22 pm

Claradoon wrote:
No, I've always felt that something's missing in NTs. How can they possibly live in a world without sensitivities? I usually chalk this up to perception but there's reaction too. I remember one day seeing a beautiful rainbow downtown among the tall buildings, reaching clear down to the street from the sky. People looked to see what I was staring at, noticed the rainbow, said "Ah!" and kept going with their babbling. They just don't get it.

QFT :idea: us spectrumites exist for some good reasons. we're the ones who remember to stop and smell the roses. :flower:



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17 Jul 2019, 10:48 pm

auntblabby wrote:
Rainbow_Belle wrote:
Having few or no friends and being constantly rejected by society totally sucks.

then it is time to reject society in turn, and make your own way and go there. :idea: :alien:


That's pretty much what I've done. I have never felt like a piece is missing, but I often feel out of place... wrong planet :roll: NTs are the weirdos.



ezbzbfcg2
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18 Jul 2019, 1:17 am

Absolutely.

It's sort of like I don't know what it is I'm missing, but I'm cognizant enough to know I'm missing something. I wonder what it would be like to be "turned-on" and experience a whole other side of life, the world, my senses, etc.



auntblabby
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18 Jul 2019, 1:24 am

ezbzbfcg2 wrote:
Absolutely. It's sort of like I don't know what it is I'm missing, but I'm cognizant enough to know I'm missing something. I wonder what it would be like to be "turned-on" and experience a whole other side of life, the world, my senses, etc.

i briefly had a taste of NT-world when i was on Strattera. there are other spectrumites who swear by the Nootropics [the "racitams"] that are presently legal to self-experiment with.