Public Displays of Affection (PDA)

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kmarie57
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03 Aug 2019, 7:28 am

How do you feel about PDA?

I get uncomfortable when other people do it, 1) because I don't know where to look and 2) I don't understand how they're so okay with being all over each other in public.

But I am more so wondering how you feel about PDA for yourself.

I had a high school boyfriend that I did a lot of PDA with...hugging and kissing (a peck here or there, never making out) in the hallways or hand holding, but never really more than that. One time we were saying goodbye at school and a teacher came up to us and got in our face and said "can I watch?" what the heck. Ever since then I have found it difficult to display my affection publicly.

With my current boyfriend, it took me a long time before I was okay with hugging or kissing him (again, just a peck or two, never making out) in public or holding his hand publicly. We are very affectionate at home, but in public I just feel very uncomfortable and am worried that people might be watching. I will hug, kiss or hold his hand in public now, but I still feel uncomfortable and every time I go to kiss him in public I have to look around me to make sure no one is watching.

Anyone else dislike doing their own public displays of affection?

While we're here, does anyone have an idea of why that creepy teacher's words got to me so much? I am sure that he said those words to plenty of other students as well, and I doubt that they affected anybody else as strongly as they did me.



Tim_Tex
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03 Aug 2019, 7:44 am

I’m ok with it


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smudge
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03 Aug 2019, 7:58 am

I think kissing is too much, it always makes me uncomfortable.

The teacher wasn't being creepy, they were hinting that you shouldn't do that stuff there and that you should be ashamed of people watching.



kmarie57
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03 Aug 2019, 8:06 am

smudge wrote:
The teacher wasn't being creepy, they were hinting that you shouldn't do that stuff there and that you should be ashamed of people watching.


I understood the meaning behind his actions, and it definitely worked seeing as how I struggle to do it at all now, but the way he went about it was DEFINITELY creepy. I am a teacher now, and there are plenty of better ways to tell students to cut out the PDA. I typically straight up tell the kids that they're being gross and that nobody wants to see it, but I would NEVER get in their face nor would I ask to watch. That would be uncomfortable for everyone involved.



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03 Aug 2019, 9:03 am

kmarie57 wrote:
smudge wrote:
The teacher wasn't being creepy, they were hinting that you shouldn't do that stuff there and that you should be ashamed of people watching.


I understood the meaning behind his actions, and it definitely worked seeing as how I struggle to do it at all now, but the way he went about it was DEFINITELY creepy. I am a teacher now, and there are plenty of better ways to tell students to cut out the PDA. I typically straight up tell the kids that they're being gross and that nobody wants to see it, but I would NEVER get in their face nor would I ask to watch. That would be uncomfortable for everyone involved.


He didn't actually mean he wanted to watch though. These days I don't think teachers would say that sort of thing, you're right.



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03 Aug 2019, 1:29 pm

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03 Aug 2019, 2:34 pm

I personally would not care to see people all over each other eating each others faces and what not, though not really my business so I don't care that much...and I suspect people that are ok going that far in public probably don't care much what anyone thinks of it.

That said no need to feel self conscious about holding hands or a little kiss here and there, i do actually think it is kind of nice when I see people displaying a bit of affection in public...kind of weird when couples at the grocery store don't at all for instance.


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03 Aug 2019, 4:48 pm

If I had a girlfriend I would want to hold hands and not let go but I am a bit shy when it comes to more. I mean... In private I will kiss and hug and I will give a small hug in public and if I have to, a quick kiss. But I feel exposed. If in a private place or somewhere hidden I am fine to kiss and cuddle. :)
I am not sure if this is normal. Others seem to be a bit more forward in public.


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modernmax
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03 Aug 2019, 5:41 pm

smudge wrote:
kmarie57 wrote:
smudge wrote:
The teacher wasn't being creepy, they were hinting that you shouldn't do that stuff there and that you should be ashamed of people watching.


I understood the meaning behind his actions, and it definitely worked seeing as how I struggle to do it at all now, but the way he went about it was DEFINITELY creepy. I am a teacher now, and there are plenty of better ways to tell students to cut out the PDA. I typically straight up tell the kids that they're being gross and that nobody wants to see it, but I would NEVER get in their face nor would I ask to watch. That would be uncomfortable for everyone involved.


He didn't actually mean he wanted to watch though. These days I don't think teachers would say that sort of thing, you're right.


I know a teacher who would definitely say that, and it it wouldn't be because he was creepy, it would just be his style of humor.


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04 Aug 2019, 10:30 am

kmarie57 wrote:
I had a high school boyfriend that I did a lot of PDA with...hugging and kissing (a peck here or there, never making out) in the hallways or hand holding, but never really more than that.
I'm very affectionate but only with women I'm in a romantic relationship with. Me & my current girlfriend hold hands a lot when going places & we sometimes touch each other or pat each other. We don't usually do hugging or kissing or tell each other "I Love You" when out in public unless she's leaving for the night & I went with her to the bus stop. I don't really notice when other people do PDA stuff cuz I'm too much in my own head.


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06 Aug 2019, 11:58 am

I would get uncomfortable with it. I can't get in a romantic mood when there are lots of people to pay attention to.



Roboto
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06 Aug 2019, 12:12 pm

It's pretty distracting when happening to myself and either comical or gross when witnessing others depending on my mood.



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12 Aug 2019, 11:06 pm

I find it rather creepy when I see couples doing that. I'm not the romantic type.


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Farunel
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16 Aug 2019, 2:05 am

I think it's kinda disrespectful considering it is uncomfortable I'd say for MOST people lol. I mean "those" couples though. The ones that go into a full on makeup session in a public space. Just. Whyyyyyy.

I'm not bothered by people hugging, handholding, or giving a peck, though.

I mostly haven't seen anyone go into full make out mode in public since highschool luckily. There was one chick at where I used to work that would do it right outside the production room. This was a retail store, mind you. I always thought it was kind of weird for an adult to be doing that.



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17 Aug 2019, 4:18 pm

I have no problem with PDAs.


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