Are You The Same Online As You Are In Real Life?

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CockneyRebel
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06 Sep 2019, 10:01 pm

I certainly am. I say and do the same things in real life that I do online.


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Justin101
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10 Sep 2019, 10:19 am

We like to think we have some absolute identity that never changes. It's what we're taught and conditioned by society to believe.

Who exactly are you?
Some separate entity moving independently through the world - or an organism, inter-existing with other organisms, that changes ?

People change in different circumstances and settings. Some behaviour exhibited in one setting never arises in another.

No better example of that can be the divide between online and offline. Anyone who says they are exactly the same in both scenarios - well, I'll believe it when I see it.



IsabellaLinton
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10 Sep 2019, 11:39 am

My thoughts, opinions, experiences and sense of humour are the same IRL an online. I use WP as a tool to explore who I am and what I believe. I often surprise myself with the degree of clarity I can achieve after multiple edits and contemplating each post to its core.

If you were to meet me in real life, I sense you would be a little surprised. Here's what you would find:

I would be almost mute, so you wouldn't hear me say the types of comments or emotions that I write.
I would have a LOT of difficulty in emotional situations because of alexithymia, so I'd retreat.
I might appear disinterested or expressionless, because that's just how many of us present.
I would barely look at you or make eye contact, and it's doubtful I would recognise you the next day.
I would be stimming so much it would make you dizzy.
I'd be twisted up in a pretzel shape, in a darkened room with candles because I am so light sensitive.

I think a lot of us would be like this ^ because our physical selves (speaking, doing, presenting) are so much different from our cerebral selves (thinking, feeling, being). It's easy to picture one another as vibrant individuals full of wit and wisdom, but in real life we would have a harder time demonstrating these qualities. Our surface level appearance and our inner personalities often have a marked disconnect.


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lostonearth35
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10 Sep 2019, 11:59 am

When I first started going online in the early 2000's, I was so afraid to say anything about myself that could end up ruining my entire life, especially my being an aspie. But on YouTube I couldn't take the misconceptions, negativity and people using "autistic" as an insult so now I proverbially wave my Asperger's around like a flag whenever I can.

I think I'm pretty much the same offline as I am online since I find it almost impossible to not be myself. Although I haven't shown what I look like in real life except for a few Facebook photos. :)



JustFoundHere
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10 Sep 2019, 1:31 pm

Personally, I've asked myself whether or not I'm the same online as I am in real-life.

To best answer this question, I largely define my life online through my work & art, yet I also define my life by making the time to step-away from the computer; that is real-life recreation-like - as I don't use a SmartPhone.

In a nutshell, my life online, and offline is best descried as that online/offline Gestalt - no decisive 'YES' or 'NO' answers.

In short, If asked whether or not I'm the same online as I am in real-life, it might be best to answer, "some say yes, some say no, I tend to agree!"



Meistersinger
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10 Sep 2019, 5:48 pm

Yes. I’m just as miserable in real life as I am online.



Mountain Goat
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11 Sep 2019, 12:29 pm

Real life is different somehow....


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Mona Pereth
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12 Sep 2019, 1:49 pm

Caesars_Ghost wrote:
I am so ashamed at my failures and struggles that I am embarrassed for others to meet me.

I hope you can find an adult autistic/Aspie support group in your area and thus find others who have had similar struggles. That might be the first step out of what sounds to me like a vicious circle in what you've described of how you relate to others, and might be a place to find some real friends.


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Mona Pereth
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12 Sep 2019, 1:59 pm

Magna wrote:
Aside from the fact that I communicate far better in written form than verbally, I'm the same online as I am in real life in that online I've never created any false persona. This is the real me.

I don't create a fake persona, but my behaviors online and offline are nevertheless different in some ways. For example, in online conversation I generally prefer primarily public forum discussion and only limited PM's, whereas, in person, I'm much better in one-on-one conversation than in informal group conversation. Also, because I can edit my posts before I submit them, I can be ultra-rational online to a greater extent than I am in real life.


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