Are You The Same Online As You Are In Real Life?

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I know this is a difficult one to work out as there is also masking involved...

I once met a group of people from an online Christian site. The then owner of the site was most amused as he said that I was exactly the same in real life as I was online. Ah. As I am writing this, I realize. I sometimes wear my "Acting thick" mask even though I am online, as it is a form of protection. I wonder if that is what he meant? Or is it I speak what comes into my mind? I don't know what they meant, as how can you be someone else online? Wouldn't that be like living a lie. Oh, I would not want to do that! That would be soo complicated. No, I'll be me. I am me. Great!

Most people aren't even the same in real life as they are in real life. The context you're in and the company you're with will often affect how you'll behave. There are things that I'd say and do around certain people that I would never say and do around certain other people.

Same goes for the internet. There are things I'd post here that I'd never post on Facebook. There are things I'd post on Facebook that I'd never post on here. There are things I would say on certain websites and forums that I would not say here. There are things I would say to certain members that I would not say to other members.

So no, I'm not the same online as I am in real life, nor am I the same in real life as I am in real life, nor am I the same online as I am online.

i think if you ignored my appearance, you would find i am the same in person as i am online.

Not sure. I do think 'yes', but in some ways it may or may not count.
My verbal text representation, no matter how similar from another, is very different from my real life counterpart.


Maybe it had something to do with language itself: written English online, spoken Tagalog in real life. That is, if languages do have 'personalities'.
But then going written Tagalog is also just inconsistent if I recall my past online life, only less intense than the now.


I'm inconsistent -- no matter who's around and where I'm.
Doesn't matter if it's my boss during work, my mom at party nights, some old friends visiting home, strangers at public...
Didn't matter if it's the gaming forum I used to go to, that chat rooms I went into, that online game I used to be very active, or whatever social media platforms involved.


In real life, I'm already inconsistent in real time and there are no masking involved. In real life, no one around me could make up their minds what my traits are exactly.
Online, well... You'd be the judge.

Few things are consistent though; and it has something to do with my current moods and how some mental state thinks... (i.e. If I'm not angry in real life, I cannot sound angry online -- etc... ) Which in and itself inconsistent in real time.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

Online I don't have as much of an issue with social anxiety as I do in real life, and I don't have the selective mutism to worry about. In person I'm probably a lot more shy and timid than I am online.

Yeah I'm a dick in real life too

Overall, I think I'm the same... but with one big difference.
When I'm responding on this forum I end up deleting the post about 80% of the time. I've already deleted a couple of posts this morning before I pressed the send button. I wish I could do that in real life every time I say something stupid.

Haha. You guys are funny. Cyberbad! Haha. You are not that bad.

Yes. I also either "Go for it!" or I delete much of what I write. Especially a few longer posts.

I was drawn immediately to this thread as I find it perplexing and astounding that from my personal experience, I could not and cannot entertain the idea of not being the same.

God how I've tried to be that sophisticated in my social construct. If I could have done that, oh my goodness, I could of just hid behind some rather dull and suffocatingly normalised version of myself. The only other option I have deployed was utter and complete silence. Ha. This came across weirder than just being me. Hang it, I started. It's me or nothing at all. So it's me and well, the payoff..no friends..I can't do both.

I'm the same online and in real world and the problems I face in the real world are the same online.. can't make friends..weird even on wrong planet haha..it's me, of course..but I admire any of you who can trim and edit even just a small part of you...good for you..or not, depends on your persuasion I guess.

Not sure why I do go online.. lol..I swing between obnoxious and non relatable or just plain boring I suppose. Well, as they say in the classics..

That's all folks...

Aside from the fact that I communicate far better in written form than verbally, I'm the same online as I am in real life in that online I've never created any false persona. This is the real me.

No.
* Here I can be thoughtful and in some ways more vulnerable.
* IRL I can't "watch what I say" in real time or the audience is less likely to "get it", so am more often silent.

I would say I'm pretty similar online as I am in "real life."

There used to be a contrast between my written production and spoken production, in favor of my written production. Over the years, though, my writing has gone down a little, while my oral speech has gotten better.

I had a rethink about my original post on this topic. Wow this site really is amazing. I realised it was the complete opposite after reading through everyone else's responses.

Thanks to everyone who does reply. It's making me consider my motives, well, how much of my ASD is me, all of it.

Defence mechanisms. I avoid authenticity life the plague and the only way that I am the same online and in real world

So, honest answer. I'm so scared of rejection and being sensed as "not normal" that I hide behind humour or my superiority complex which is really my inferiority complex. I have made sure I have no friends so I don't "infect" them with my weird personality and make them feel uncomfortable.

I am so ashamed at my failures and struggles that I am embarrassed for others to meet me.

I am the same online and in real world. I am fake, shallow, mirroring, rehearsed, making sure I am not approachable whilst desperately hoping someone will approach.

I intellectulise everything so I don't feel anything as I don't have emotional intelligence, well that's a lie, I do but I use it as an excuse to victimize myself.

I avoid taking responsibility for this as I took the easy way out, avoidance and dissociate, play victim due to all my "perceived" hard luck rendering myself a non player in game of life. I can't help my partner or daughter as too absorbed with my own flooding of demise and poor me story.

My ASD and adhd diagnosis merely gave me a permission slip to justify my sulk instead of standing up.

I want to. Ironically, I love me but scared of the physical pain that hits my chest at when I "think" i am not liked, rejected. So, I get there first.. classic text book stuff.

I have never told anyone this but this is the place to do it. Meaning? I feel in this space, there are others who face trials and challenges with ASD and other(s) conditions and I see the effort being made here on Wrong Planet by everyone...I want to respect that and myself.

I am same in real life and online. I hide who I am behind my chronic social phobia/anxiety. My confidence is a rehearsed survival character that exhausts me, and can sound like a prick lol.. arrogant twat lol...I hate that.

Thanks for the thread and sorry guys...hope I didn't go on too much and take away from this chat...

CG

I can relate to much of that. I don't know how deeply though. I really am expert at times using a mask of humour combined with acting thick. I can have a wierd sense of humour when masking as well. It is a not really funny but makes people burst out laughing sort of humour, which is not easy to achieve.
I use my humour and acting thick to be able to communicate when I do not otherwize know how.
I am very much the same online and offline as I mask the same but I have found I can sometimes unmask on this site without risking vunerability.

no.


No-one is.

I'm the sweetest and kindest autistic man offline and well, I try to be online.

LOL