Feeling depressed due to being single at 30

Post Reply New Topic

Last edited by magz on 21 Mar 2021, 4:38 am, edited 1 time in total.: inappropriate content removed

I studied two degrees at an American university--mathematics and pre-med molecular biology, thus having twice the courseload of a regular student. I then went to the UK to study chemical engineering...


Holy Sh*t. Why don't you just build a companion?

As a NT I didn't get married tilli was 34 and married a 24 year old AS girl I found that at 34 I was mature enough to overlook her issues and see she was a good girl.if I would have been younger I would of not been mature enough

I wonder if anybody found a girlfriend by following the Prince of Persuasia's advice I would NOT advise this thou even if it would work

Us Aspies can sure a handful sometimes with lots of things including romantic relationships. I know I'm a giant one. However we can have lots of good qualities but others don't always take the time to notice or care to appropriate them. We're like roses. We're covered in thorns but we make pretty flowers that smell nice. Some people notice the thorns & are afraid of getting pricked but some others notice the pretty flowers & decide to stop & smell the roses & maybe even pick some despite the risk of them getting pricked.

It's not uncommon for us Aspies to be in romantic relationships that have big age gaps. Sometimes the NT takes on a caretaking type role. Unfortunately it's not uncommon for NT women to rant about about how they felt like moms when in relationships with Aspies. I wonder if NT guys have issues with that as well when in relationships with Aspie women. I don't see much talk online by NT guys who've been in relationships with Aspie women. Maybe it's cuz Aspergers is diagnosed a lot more in men than women, the guys in relationships with women Aspie women don't know that the women are Aspies. Or maybe it's cuz of the men aren't bothered as much about that due to the traditional gender roles with dating & relationships. You don't have to comment about this Brehus, I'm just kinda thinking & speculating.

i believe its part of human nature to get depressed or just wish we got to experience certain milestones or events, things in our life, before we actually did.

It's better to be alone then with the wrong person or with someone and still feel along. It's better to be single then be with someone for the sake of it, it's better to be alone then on rebounds and end up feeling empty and in a mess then spend time healing.

I understand how you're feeling but never say never!

What do they pair up on?

Looks and social status.

The most attractive women pair up with the most attractive men. Tens with tens, nines with nines, eights with eights, etc. The people on the highest tier of attractiveness get first pickings, then the tier after them get their pick of who's left after that and so on. Until you get to the lower tiers where all the unattractive men and women are the only ones left, and their only options are to settle for each other or be alone forever.

I'm not sure if this is how things work in the LGBTQ community. I can only speak from my own experiences.

You're going to Grad School; you're too smart to really believe this stuff!

Everyone is going to seek out the best possible mate. That's just biology.

I'll agree that people seek out the most attractive mate...but attractive isn't necessarily about physical looks or social status. And what different people find attractive is subjective.

People might not pair up that much because of similar interests but those things do tend to 'open doors' to the possibility of it. Also interests are an extension or branch from our mentalities and values. Those two things do tend to be what can make a relationship when they are compatible between two people. So interests are not entirely unrelated to the relationship process.

Anyway, since this thread popped up again I figured I someone should say that the OP, Leon, succeeded in getting a girlfriend last year. And last I knew was in the process to moving where she lives to be with her.

I think it can be much more complicated than simply having the same interests. There's numerous potential factors. One of the most common 1s NTs talk about wanting on dating sites is "mutual chemistry" or "spark" & I would guess that the short explanation of that one is how well they communicate & interact with each other. They just suddenly hit it off when they meet. It was like that with me & my 1st girlfriend but I personally base relationships on more substantive things like them being a trustworthy dependable caring supportive person that I can respect.

That's awesome I didn't know this thread was that old. Thanx for the update. We don't hear about enough positive things on this forum. In general people come & post on support sites like this when they're having a problem. It's always great to hear about potential success. I don't get jelly of anyone unless they achieve their success by playing dirty

It is a cruel, cruel world.

Seriously?

Not everyone is like that but simply look around.
The 'evidence' is there for all to see.
Most are.
No hiding it.