So I joined an online dating app

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Someone whom I matched with before her has started messaging me again on the app.

This was a surprise since I somewhat assumed that they had lost interest. However, I know that University can be busy so I also considered that as a possibility.

I know less about this person than I do with her. They live further away, but still within travelling distance. Also, they are in their third year of University (a different one to the one I go to). Whereas my social media friend (as Raphael F puts it) and I are both in our second year. I feel slightly bad about talking to this third year student, despite not having much reason to.

Currently, I'm not entirely sure how to approach this situation. I'd like to meet this social media friend in person, perhaps we should hang out first before attempting a date. Or maybe not. I don't know. Now, if things go well, then in that case I'd let the other down gently.

Never rains but it pours!

Maybe the returning app messager had lost interest, but her position has shifted and now for whatever reason you have become more interesting to her again. Or maybe she was busy as you say. Or maybe she was having doubts of some kind that were not to do with you but with herself.

If all you're doing at present is talking on an app, you would ultimately have the same right to just fade away as she did before ... wouldn't you? For all we know, she's also talking to 300,000 other girls.

I asked my social media friend if she'd like to meet up sometime. She told me she'd love to, but is unfortunately quite busy with a work placement at the moment.

However, she also added that she will let me know when things quiet down.

Oh well. If she can say that, then clearly you have the right to stall the App Messager too, if you so wish. I guess that's how these things work. I came to the conclusion flirting and dating and getting to know people on-line was even weirder and more of a minefield than doing it in real life! But I can see some advantages to it.

And it certainly can be true that a work placement absorbs all your energy and attention, even if there is someone you'd really like to be spending time with. I remember my teacher-training course: within a few weeks, I hadn't the time nor the head-space to think about relationships, and others on the course who were much better at dating and socializing etc. rapidly gave up those pursuits!

Hopefully she will get back to you before long. Did she mention how long her work placement was supposed to last? I suppose you can't actually ask without sounding over-eager.

Good luck, poppet. I have to leave Wrong Planet, for reasons that are not at all to do with you. That isn't a suicide note, by the way! My life is difficult, but manageable (given a bucket of coal and a bottle of wine, obviously).

But I won't forget you for a long time, if ever. And I won't cease to wish you well, even if I do forget you. If you see what I mean.

Sounds to me as though you're on a scary roller-coaster, but even if the scariest bits are awful, try to enjoy the adrenaline-fuelled fun bits, yeah?

xxx

Update: We're meeting up! This weekend. Video game session. Plus, she told me that someday she'd teach me how to play D&D (never played it before) so I have that to look forward to also.

In the mean time, I'll be working on writing a script for a short film that I'm involved in. Which I'll be directing.

My life is going well at the moment.

Update: She cancelled. It seems that she is having a rough time at the moment. However, she hopes that we can reschedule soon. We're going to talk later about it. I'll give her some space if she wants, and I'll listen when / if she wants to talk about it as well.

Man...I just hate this “space” thing.

It drives me up the wall!

I hope she will come to the plate soon (meaning she will keep her promises and not back off).