Mindfulness and ASD

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For me i often find mindfulness in ordinary things like reading a book with nobody around beside a lovely dog.
Or even do nothing at all than sitting in a chair with that same lovely dog. When im alone i can better regulate the income to my brain, being alone keeps the bottle-neck away.

I've been doing meditation, stilling the mind (I guess that's much the same thing as what's called mindfulness these days) for many decades, on and off. I can't honestly say that it ever changed me, and these days I only use it as a way of getting to sleep, for which it's vaguely effective in mild cases of insomnia.

I've sometimes thought about whether or not there's anything particularly harmful in not stilling the mind, and I'm not at all sure that there is. I tend to focus very intensely on whatever subject matter comes my way, but I've never known it do me any harm. I would think if there was any fatigue from it that normal sleep would provide the required rest break. It's possible that meditation could be useful to people who tend to brood over negative ideas a lot, but I don't do that so much. In my normal mode of thinking I tend to isolate problems and then I simply look around for solutions.

I don't get stressed out much since I retired, and even when I was unfortunate enough to have to be in a stressful environment, my way of fixing it was mostly about figuring out how to remove the source of the stress rather than trying to condition my mind to somehow rise above it, though I did develop one or two coping strategies, such as remembering to watch my mood and to try to let stressful situations "wash over me" rather than latching onto the anxiety, remembering to keep my breathing slow, deep and regular, though I was never one to breathe any other way, and just fostering the habit of staying calm and aware that most of the worrying things that can happen are actually pretty trivial. Physical exercise was also helpful.

So ultimately I guess I prefer not to pin my hopes on any particular "-ism" or technique, but just to use common sense and to try out any ideas that look as if they might do some good, to learn what works and what doesn't, in the same way as I'd solve any other problem. I'm very introspective, always wondering about what's going on in my brain, but I don't brood over misfortune very much.

Having re-read some of the yoga and meditation books that raised great hopes when I was much younger, I suspect that quite a lot of the content is overstated rubbish, though there remains a core of validity in it all somewhere. I still like a lot of the ideas in Zen, and I've occasionally felt better through hearing about them.

I like the idea of just serenely sitting back doing nothing and thinking nothing, but it's not a thing that I seem at all able to do. I don't consider myself to be particularly unhappy. There are some things that could be better in my life but overall I don't feel much sense of grievance. I tend to think that if anything's wrong, it'll either go away or I'll have to fix it, or maybe I won't be able to fix it and will just have to live with it. It's still somewhat new to me to ask questions such as "who has solved this, and what can I learn from them?" I'm still moving on from habitually trying to solve everything myself and reinventing the wheel. But sometimes it's fun to reinvent a wheel.

The beach/sea/ocean/dunes are also a good location to get in a state of mindfulness.
The vacation is from 2 weeks ago, but i am still mindful. Mindful is also a bit mind-empty for me, empty in a positive way.

Mindfulness is different from Meditation.

Mindfulness, as I have understood it, means always bringing yourself back to the present, when those thoughts start to crowd up the mind. You do this throughout the day, all day long, as much as you can. Pay attention to the temperature of the dishwater, the crickets chirpping, the ultralight motor in the distance...you get the idea. Most of us (at least in the western world) are do, do, do. Essentially we do ourselves right out of our lives.

Meditation is a specific practice of emptying the mind. There are lots of different kinds of medication and I'm sure some are more woo-woo than others. I think the practice part is more important than the underlying theories/religion/etc.

What I have found most interesting is the concept of communal meditation, as practiced by a Buddhist sanga or a traditional Quaker meeting. It is as if the presence of more people makes it easier and more meaningful to delve into the meditative depths.

For the OP, living in the western world, there are so many different practices out there. You will need to try many and see what works for you.

Also, I have found that when it is most successful for me, the problems in my life are pointed out in stark relief. This can be uncomfortable. From there I can decide or be led as to how to tolerate them, or change what I am doing.

I feel as if I have been almost beaten to death with 'mindfulness' "teachings", How-to's, guidance, advice, being pushed pushed pushed, instructed, and discussed. I was overwhelmed so many times trying desperately to do what they were telling me to and feeling like a failure because I simply could not accomplish at instructed. Now I have 'performance anxiety" and the teachings have given me "aversion therapy" to even that word "mindfulness" and also "meditation".
I have never been able to visualize a thing and mindfulness/meditation always starts with something like "picture a beach" "picture yourself -- somewhere".

I have lately discovered I have full blown aphantasia and that stuff simply can't work in my case.

I find my best mental state, and what brings me the ability to have calm awareness and quiet thoughts is when I am walking. I do even better in a quiet place alone, like the woods or the lake shores. I walk walk walk walk and for me that is my best link to sanity and peace.

"mindfulness" as it is pushed on the general public is simply not for everybody, and many of us have difficulty with the "just do it" approach of "mindfulness" "teaching".

Each of us will be different and many will need to find our own way to what gives us inner peace.

Best wishes from one who must follow a different path to find myself. You are not alone!

A dog with mirror-neurons during their mindfulness session