Page 1 of 1 [ 12 posts ] 

aspieprincess123
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 16 Aug 2015
Age: 34
Posts: 292
Location: england

03 Dec 2019, 9:49 am

I feel so blown away and hurt.

2 days ago I had my partner sit me down at the table and ask if we can break up.

I asked why as I assumed all was fine and we not been arguing or anything. He said that while he feels find of me and likes me as a friend he purely thinks that he's fallen out of love with me and it is not fair for me to continue on like everything is ok.

I asked what was wrong and he said nothing is then I demanded to know if there was another woman he swore that there was not and to be honest if there were do I have the right to argue as I cheated on him before.

I then asked if we could talk things out and hope he loves me again bit he said he's been feeling more and more disconnected from me as time went on.

I thought he was just tired when he stopped having sex with me as much and I had to pressure him for what sex I got from him.

He said that he will move out once he finds somewhere to live and said I could either have the house as it's mortgage free but he wants the savings or I could have the savings and he has the house. The savings is about half the house value.

I wish I could fix this at the minute I been spending days in bed he offered to move out but I want him here even if he's not in bed with me so I know he's close. He did shout at me last night as I tried to climb into his bed last night to initiate sex he didn't respond well.



domineekee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jan 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,745
Location: UK

03 Dec 2019, 12:05 pm

Sorry to hear this bad news.



blazingstar
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Nov 2017
Age: 65
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,746

03 Dec 2019, 1:11 pm

I am so sorry that you are going through this. Breaking up is difficult to do. At this point, I would make sure you get an agreement on your property and savings that does not screw you over. Be practical about this and protect your interests. You will live with this choice for the rest of your life.


_________________
Eyes that watch the morning star
usually shine brighter,
Arms held out to dark they say,
usually hold tighter.


Threnody, Dorothy Parker
as modified by David Tamulovich


Teach51
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Jan 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 904
Location: Where angels do not fear to tread.

03 Dec 2019, 1:30 pm

Big hug. Sorry you are going through this.


_________________
My best will just have to be good enough.


aspieprincess123
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 16 Aug 2015
Age: 34
Posts: 292
Location: england

04 Dec 2019, 4:06 am

It's gut wrenching I took time off from work just so I can sit in bee and cry about it.

He's already provided legal documentation which he said he wants me to check with a solicitor and even has paid for me to have time with one.

I would rather we tried to fix things and I asked why he didn't love me anymore but he said he didn't want to fall out of love and he's been trying to fix that.

I don't think he would try and rip me off he has even given me all the savings which is half the house value as we talking around 40k or I can have the house it's up to me.

At the minute we still live together though he won't share a bed with me and he's moved his computer and stuff to the spare room. He still tidies the house and cooks for us though he eats either alone or in silence in the dining room.

I plan on trying to talk to him tonight cause I want answers.



domineekee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jan 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,745
Location: UK

04 Dec 2019, 4:44 am

Best of luck aspieprincess and I hope you have support from friends and family where you are.



Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 45,646
Location: Houston, Texas

04 Dec 2019, 5:26 am

Sorry to hear. I hope your situation improves.


_________________
Who’s better at math than a robot? They’re made of math!


DorkyNerd
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

Joined: 29 Nov 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 88
Location: NYC

08 Dec 2019, 10:29 pm

My deepest sympathies.

Breaking up is torture. The end of a relationship- that's the worst thing in the universe!



aspieprincess123
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 16 Aug 2015
Age: 34
Posts: 292
Location: england

09 Dec 2019, 4:37 pm

I'm so sick of everything.

2 days ago my ex or not it's in the air at the minute said before I went out with my mum that we can talk about things on the night to find a way forward.
I was feeling confident especially as he kissed my cheek but when I came back home my worst nightmare came true.

I found him on the floor in the spare bedroom barely alive he had written several suicide notes saying how he will finally see his daughter and explaining that he cannot cope with living knowing that he could have done more to save her.

The letter he left to me was saying sorry and he did love me but he wanted me angry and hateful of him so that I would move on quicker.

Thankfully we had caught it and got him rushed into hospital he had taken a months worth of anti seizure drugs and he is alive though critical.

I been spending as much time with him but what more can I do even if he survives this what's to stop him trying again. I been thinking and his mum agrees that we need to get urgent mental health help for him.



Mountain Goat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2019
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,280
Location: Near the trees and fields on a hill near the sea not far from beaches, harbours and castles on the Welsh coastline in the British Isles in the U.K. You know, that place next to Europe?.

09 Dec 2019, 4:54 pm

Oh dear. What a difficult situation! You are a gem. It could be that he may have been suicidal for a while and didn't want to tell you? Yes, stay in touch with his parents and do all you can to keep him safe. I am praying. It is difficult. Oh how I want everything to turn out right.


_________________
Awaiting asessment. Neurodiverse 173/200. Neurotypical 21/200.
Empathy 11/80. AQ 39. May make sense to some. :)


DorkyNerd
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

Joined: 29 Nov 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 88
Location: NYC

09 Dec 2019, 6:34 pm

OH my God. That is awful.

I am so, so sorry to hear that.



ASPartOfMe
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Aug 2013
Age: 62
Gender: Male
Posts: 20,004
Location: Long Island, New York

09 Dec 2019, 7:06 pm

Sorry


_________________
Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity

My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person. - Sara Luterman