Okay, I took a look at your post. My opinion, self esteem. Especially as an aspie it can be super easy to have low self esteem, especially when you might have trouble in the social side of things, and just take terrible behavior because you already consider yourself as deficient that you just take what attention you can get. Maybe even notice it at the time, but perhaps feel like you are something to be put up with.
I could be only projecting with all of this, I can mostly say that my own social problems where I pretty much never contact people that I consider my friends first, because I never want to bother them, and that is how I see myself, where I just convince myself that I am better alone. Probably a sort of ironic stance that I don't have a lot of first hand romantic experience, which probably should be enough to counter everything I say. Can be easy to just accept an easy path that says you can be happy and not upset another, then to do what you should know is healthier for yourself.
As for what to do, well I can't give any definitive answer, I spend most personal experiences being terrified of rejection and making things awkward for others. Perhaps mostly tell your niece that she is a valid person that deserves more than what she got, and find someone much better suited for her, but also that does not need that to love herself. That next time someone makes her feel uncomfortable in a relationship, confront them and if she does not like their answer she is valid to end it, anyone worth her time should not make her feel that way, even if other things make her feel happy.
Probably less preachy than how I say it though. This makes me sound too much like a keyboard warrior.
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Through dream I travel, at lantern's call
To consume the flames of a kingdom's fall
06 Dec 2019, 11:25 am
