Very late Diagnosis - identification at a late, some notes..

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icecreamcart
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08 Dec 2019, 2:30 pm

I do not “HAVE” ASD, I am ASD (probably). We are NOT a disease. We are a way of being, perhaps even the future. Albeit in the process of evolution. I am not defective.... have you seen the other 99% lately?

• ability to focus on a task for a long period of time (even years)
• above-average intelligence with adept logical reasoning ability (seeing the obvious)
• ability to understand and simplify complex sets of data.(seeing the heart of it)

can socialise very well, but it’s at the cost of intellectual and emotional exhaustion, and this can confuse others in terms of sometimes seeing social competence but other times seeing a great need for social withdrawal and isolation.

Unfortunately, impaired cognitive empathy (or theory of mind) is a common characteristic of autistic people,

I just ask. I know I don’t know, so I ask, gently (ok, so I think it’s gentle).

It is generally accepted that the happiest autistic adults work in their area of special interest.

Michael Fitzgerald describes the consequences of not diagnosing ASD before 13 years of age as ‘devastating’. ‘The consequences include deep depression, suicidal ideas, poor school performance, academic deterioration, dropping out of school, anxiety

Yeah yeah, had all those

The three most commonly accepted co-occurring mental health issues are depression, pathological anxiety states and obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD).

And those, apparent rather than real...

Many late-diagnosed autistic adults experience mental exhaustion due to intense mental activity, and from trying to survive in a ‘strange’ world using intellect rather than instinct and intuition.

Alone time is required, an hour walking (music is nice), swimming preferably alone, or one or two other activities that free my mind. Best I do not name my (past) useful prescription medication.

ASD can be a very painful affliction because many of us who have it may appear normal, so some people may disbelieve us. Most of us have above-average intelligence and we tend to be more sensitive than neurotypical people, so acts of bullying and other abuse tend to cause us more pain and suffering.

Aye, to this day, suffering the idiots.

Abandonment: Undiagnosed autistic adults have a much higher chance of being rejected or abandoned by their parents and relatives than do diagnosed children.

Oooh. I had forgotten this one. Boarding school from age 8 to 18. Left there one day without warning... cried myself to sleep for weeks. Became tough. ?

Very often we ask logical questions innocently, genuinely trying and wanting to understand the relationship between ‘things’.

NTs just don’t like being questioned do they?

Autistic individuals often have great difficulty coping with conflict.

I turn down the telly to avoid it. Debate yes. Conflict no. I avoid soap operas because they are crammed with conflict. I cringe.

Most, if not all, autism and mental health professionals claim that diagnosis of ASD is advantageous because it enables us to be aware of our strengths and weaknesses. This vital information also explains why we have always been treated differently. The recently diagnosed autistic adult may also gain access to a range of support services that include coaching, mentoring, counselling and support groups;

Had to think about this as it seems to be the core of the drive and pressure to get diagnosed. For about fifteen years I paid for psychotherapy, so NOT psychiatry. The former is “talkies”, the latter is drugs, is how it was explained to me. Now many years ago. I tried a (American) psychiatrist a few years ago, lying on a couch and using prescribed drugs was ineffective for me so I stopped; that was state funded.
I think looking back those weekly psychotherapy sessions, after which I always felt great, saved me from a vast array of negative consequences. A great deal of “hypnotherapy” was involved, and it worked for me. I know very well it does not work for others.


Self-assessment Self-assessment (or self-identification) is, of course, a personal opinion which may be validated later by a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist. This stage does not involve any third-party autism professionals, psychologists or psychiatrists, so it is limited to desk research and communication with family and friends.

I disagree. That word LIMITED. Also the expression “desk research” seems to want to obscure the availability of the internet, replete with its vast indeed unlimited array of tests, books, papers etc including the latest DSM currently 5 . It also omits mention of my sixty years of experience. I mean really? This leads me to suspect what is coming next, bearing in mind it is all subjective anyway, if not perhaps not so in due course in the not too distant future.

friends often much older or younger

Yes. Surprised. Never seen that mentioned before.

lack of friends and social life
uncomfortable in large crowds and noisy places

Yes, and others.

Restricted, repetitive patterns of behaviour, interests or activities:
obsession with ‘special interests’
collecting objects (such as stamps and coins)
attachment to routines and rituals
ability to focus on a single task for long periods
eccentric or unorthodox behaviour
non-conformist and distrusting of authority
difficulty following illogical conventions
attracted to foreign cultures
affinity with nature and animals
support for victims of injustice, underdogs and scapegoats.

ALL of those. All “under management” of course.
Gosh.. some of those are very powerful, affecting my life choices daily..


Ok that’s 50% of the book, and the rest is case studies.

Anton



ASPartOfMe
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08 Dec 2019, 7:07 pm

I have gotten along better with people older and younger than me.

I am a year younger than you and was not diagnosed until age 55. While there was a lot of pain because of not getting diagnosed for some reasons you mentioned I was glad I wasn't. For one thing if I was diagnosed with Autism as a child back in the 60s I would have been put away in an institution never to be heard from again. If I was diagnosed as a child in America now I would be subject to 25 to 40 hours a week of behavioral therapies that probably would destroy me mentally.

Speaking of mentally, many of the "co morbid" conditions are real mental illnesses. Just because a lot of them are a caused by disadvantages being a small minority in an NT world does not make them any less real.

I do not think I would have had the maturity to handle a label that says what I can not do until at least my thirties. I have been on wrong planet since 2013 and I have seen so many frustrated, no self esteem young members obsessed with what they can't do. What gets to a lot of them at a young age is that Autism is a life long condition that to them means the rest of their life is going to be a failure.

I self identify as "Autistic" rather than "person with Autism" because as it says in my signature Autism is a part of who I am.

I seriously doubt we are the next stage in evolution. Autistics have probably always been around. We can't know for sure because we can't accurately retro-diagnose. We do know there is evidence of people with autistic traits a long long time ago. IMHO the whole autism superpowers and next stage of evolution ideas is an over correction to the lack of self-esteem caused by the horrors inflicted upon us. Autism is a human condition involving strengths and weaknesses. In that way it is just like other human conditions and individuals. What differs from most other human conditions is that it is a specific set of traits that taken as a whole differ from most others.


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Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity

It is Autism Acceptance Month


B19
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08 Dec 2019, 7:15 pm

What differs from most other condition, in my opinion, is the amount of stigma that AS people have to contend with, stigma based on myth, propaganda, ignorance, and poorly designed research which is based on earlier poor research - the findings of which are invalidated by outrageous sampling bias, but parroted daily as "scientific facts about autism".
All AS people are oppressed by this, whether they know it or not.



SharonB
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09 Dec 2019, 11:38 am

icecreamcart wrote:
I just ask. I know I don’t know, so I ask, gently (ok, so I think it’s gentle).

The TOM gets me. I can imagine the five things an NT is thinking but don't know. In the meantime, the NT knows the one thing I am thinking? Noooooooo. TOM goes both ways. I think there are updated studies about that.

icecreamcart wrote:
Michael Fitzgerald describes the consequences of not diagnosing ASD before 13 years of age as ‘devastating’. ‘The consequences include deep depression, suicidal ideas, poor school performance, academic deterioration, dropping out of school, anxiety

Yeah yeah, had all those

I did too. Are those things reduced for those diagnosed before 13? (I read that DX during teenage years can be very disruptive.) Our neighbor was diagnosed ASD young; she's in college now and has ongoing anxiety, but perhaps has "escaped" those other items? I hope so. I don't know.

icecreamcart wrote:
Aye, to this day, suffering the idiots.
NTs just don’t like being questioned do they?

LOL ------ yes.

icecreamcart wrote:
Oooh. I had forgotten this one. Boarding school from age 8 to 18. Left there one day without warning... cried myself to sleep for weeks. Became tough. ?

Aww. My mom emotionally abused me, and she is AS like. She inadvertently passed on (some) past abuse; (she suffered far greater abuse.) I hope to break the majority of that cycle with my ASD daughter.

icecreamcart wrote:
Had to think about this as it seems to be the core of the drive and pressure to get diagnosed. For about fifteen years I paid for psychotherapy, so NOT psychiatry. The former is “talkies”, the latter is drugs, is how it was explained to me. Now many years ago. I tried a (American) psychiatrist a few years ago, lying on a couch and using prescribed drugs was ineffective for me so I stopped; that was state funded.
I think looking back those weekly psychotherapy sessions, after which I always felt great, saved me from a vast array of negative consequences. A great deal of “hypnotherapy” was involved, and it worked for me. I know very well it does not work for others.

Self-diagnosis in my mind is a diagnosis. One can get an ASD therapist and attend (some) support groups (which are very useful to me); one doesn't have access to case workers and the such (which I don't require at this time). I am doing EMDR right now and my AS-like mom found hypnotherapy VERY helpful. I asked my assessor about medications and he did not recommend them in my circumstance. (I was prescribed meds previously when I was misdiagnosed as Bipolar.)

icecreamcart wrote:
Ok that’s 50% of the book, and the rest is case studies.

You did get farther than I have. Ha!

Thanks for keeping in mind the "rude" reference I was looking for. It's not those you referenced on your other post, so it must be in another book I am reading (I am reading 5 at once). Sorry for the inconvenience; I appreciate your effort.

I see you related to many (most?) characteristics. I do too. I feel like the authors are writing about me. How do they know? :wink: And it's not a personality, it's a neurology. Huh. Half the memoirs I read could have been written by me (the half with the AS outgoing, expressive type).

For those of us that can, we've done a good job pretending. So tired of pretending.



icecreamcart
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09 Dec 2019, 1:03 pm

@sharon

Quote:
So tired of pretending
.

I’ll say. Just Weary of it.

@anonanon, sure the evolution thing is just a nice idea, something in the form of a positive mildly amusing dream to focus upon instead of some defective nightmare. I don’t view myself as defective, I am simply me, who I am. Like everyone else has to be accepted for who they are, me too. Do I want-a certificate of my defects.. ? No. I prefer to leave the world in doubt. Suits me being seen as eccentric etc. That’s fine.

The more I hear/read in here the more I think I dodged a bullet with my years of psychotherapy. Did she know? Doesn’t matter.

Can us ancient types support the youngsters in some way? So much of what I see I just want to give them a hug and tell them we understand and everything will be ok: sort of thing.

Anton

P.s. what’s TOM?



SharonB
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09 Dec 2019, 5:50 pm

Theory of Mind. Something about the studies sit wrong with me. Like the one of "false belief". I sometimes (often) look in the unlikely places first. Plus my sister always moved my stuff around. I'd be an idiot to look in the place I last saw something. Yet the studies' premises are often that my perspective is a "false" belief and shouldn't be attributed to others. I find amazing things with this premise. Seems a valid, if unusual, way to do things.



icecreamcart
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11 Dec 2019, 3:42 pm

Yeah!

DON’T MOVE MY STUFF!!



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11 Dec 2019, 10:40 pm

[quote="ASPartOfMe"]I have gotten along better with people older and younger than me. quote]

I was diagnosed at 65, having self-discovered a year or so before that. In my 70s now and like APOM, so glad I wasn't diagnosed young. It would have held me back in all sorts of ways.

Younger and Older Friends: this is very true of me, and always has been. One reason for this possibly (at least in my case) is that much younger friends have found me a trustworthy mentor and I have found my older friends to be trustworthy mentors. I tended to initiate the friendships with my younger friends, and the older friends tended to initiate their friendships with me. There were some very large age differences and others not so large. I was 38 years older than one of my closest friends (we are still friends) and he is the only obvious aspie.



icecreamcart
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13 Dec 2019, 4:54 pm

Seems notable (friend ages), do we have any idea why?
That said my best friend was same age as me, passed away in2017 sadly.
Not that I have many friends, just those who know me and are still my friend.
Antonio