Very late Diagnosis - identification at a late, some notes..

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SharonB
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03 Jun 2021, 3:11 pm

Welcome to WP.

I am glad you had those good years with your wife. I am sorry for her passing.

My recent AS diagnosis (near 50) allowed me to see my partnership more clearly --- in a more positive light actually. My spouse may sometimes drive me bonkers (moving items), but he also saves the day (shopping). Now I know why the movie Benny and Joon struck a bell with me all those years ago.

wrench428 wrote:
I always new I was different somehow but I compensated and did the best I could.
I would beat myself up and say " How can I be so smart and so stupid at the same time".
Well I understand now.


Exactly.



ASPartOfMe
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03 Jun 2021, 5:57 pm

wrench428 wrote:
I am new here and this is my first post.
I am 67 and just figured out (a few months ago) that I am an Aspie.
Self diagnosed. I see no need for professional conformation. I know I am right.
I didn't like it but I have accepted it and hope to be able to embrace it as time goes on.
It explains SO much of my life and is a relief to some extent.

Life was pretty good for me until my wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer 2013 and died April 2019.
We were together 24 years and the happiest of my life.
I did all I could for her and never abandoned her but after she was gone there was a huge hole in my life.
I got on the online dating thing and found what seemed to be the "Perfect Woman".
She just about drove me crazy and then I somehow discovered she is a covert narcissist.
I never knew anything about that stuff. Thought psychology was just a bunch of hooey.
That led me to believe I was a co-dependent and I guess that is true but not the underlying cause.
I always new I was different somehow but I compensated and did the best I could.
I would beat myself up and say " How can I be so smart and so stupid at the same time".
Well I understand now.

Welcome to Wrong Planet. I am sorry you had to go through what you have gone through the last few years.

It is quite possible as time goes on you will be more accepting of your Aspergers. It is a process. It takes time. You went through decades of life under some fundamentally wrong assumptions about yourself. You can not expect to figure things out in a few weeks. The best approach is to let your autistic brain do what it needs to do to process the new understanding about yourself.


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Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity

“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman