Dear_one wrote:
When I felt emotions as a boy, my AS mother just quarantined me until they faded, lest they lead to noise.
My AS-like mom similarly shut me down or left if I was upset. I have this same inclination myself but know it's better to self-regulate and teach my children (AS-like and HSP-NT) the same - it's often embarrassing for me (yes, EMBARRASESING, a social emotion), but got to start somewhere. All those times as a child I was upset and needed comfort and help to learn to self-regulate and my parent left or blamed me... doing her best of course, but without the tools... Today some of us are being equipped or otherwise equipping ourselves better. My therapist has encouraged me to hug my daughter. I like hugging but don't b/c often what I do is "too much" so it's hard to do "correctly". My daughter is the "standoffish" ASD type and I didn't want to offend her. Guess what? She likes being hugged! It's still awkward for us at times, but it's a start. Hard for me to not
overdo it and hard for her to do it. Two different ASD phenotypes interacting - gotta love us.
ASD tests need to have:
to you avoid looking at people or stare too much?
to you avoid hugging people or hug too much?
to you not notice body language or notice every single little movement (but still don't know what to do)?
OK, I want the AQ test rewritten... separate post.