not date rape but date abuse

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My sister had a date and was upset that the guy ghosted her. They attend the same university so she asked him why he ghosted her. He said that he just didn't want to date her again. She met me for lunch and was very upset. I asked her about the date and she told me everything he did and said. This guy was a complete PERVERT with anal fixation. She swore to me he didn't touch her but she was repulsed yet still upset that he doesn't want to date her anymore.
Can someone help me before I blow my own head off?? WTF??? WTF is wrong with my sister? Does she not have any sense at all??

Good that your sister has you watching out for her. Sometimes women are so emotionally hungry for love that they make allowances for inappropriate behaviour and even abuse. As the saying goes "love is blind." Been there, done that. She is lucky that he didn't want a second date. He likely was looking just for a sexual relationship, hence the focus on his preferences. Is your sister on the spectrum? She needs to learn how to sift out the bad guys.

So now man ghosting/rejecting a woman is abuse and comparable to a date rape. lol.
Even being pervert =/= abuse.

Your sister dodged a bullet.

A user will run away very fast if he can not get any fairly quickly and look for the next victim.
The best thing women can do is make the guy wait a while it gets rid of the bad ones fairly quickly..

This.

Maybe the sister is equally pervert as him? Have you thought of this very probable possibility, WPers?

Otherwise why would she be upset, eh?

She may be upset because she formed an attachment, not to this creepy guy, but to the man she thought he was.

I'm not sure it is possible to abuse someone from one encounter. Abuse is a long term thing that takes time to take root.

a·buse
verb
/əˈbyo͞oz/
2.
treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly.
"riders who abuse their horses should be prosecuted"

Anyways, anything that she can do to learn her own preferences and limits and dealbreakers will only benefit her.

Is she legally independent (capable of making her own life choices)?

You seem experienced in this.

Seems to me the guy dodged a bullet. Ghosting is mildly rude, sure, but she's not entitled to his time and attention any more than he is to hers, and this level of distress over him not wanting further dates doesn't exactly make her look stable. From the sound of it, she didn't want more dates with him either, so I'm forced to conclude that the actual issue is more along the lines of "he's not good enough to blow me off, he was supposed to pursue me so I could blow him off!". A rather unhealthy and, frankly, entitled attitude.

And why are people so determined to stretch the definition of "abuse" into complete meaninglessness?

Yeah users are good at that then when they get tired of the girl they move on to the next person to use. I personally have never used anybody like that.

There are girls that try to use guys also with them it is usually financially though.
Girls that asked for money or help financially got nothing from me.

Girls that that never asked me for anything I would do things for them.

Guy went on one date with the girl and didn't want another. It's one hell of a stretch to call that a "user".

But, apparently, the guy was into some of the kind of stuff that most women really don't want to get into. Sort of exploitative-type stuff.

It's not exploitative if both partners agree. He did make his interests clear without instigating a physical relationship, which is creepy at the start of dating but at least he was honest. He stopped talking to her when she wasn't interested, which is also the right thing to do. So far, so good. The issue is that RightGalaxy's sister needs to make a decision why she likes the guy so much. It sounds like she enjoyed the attention rather than the person himself, and they don't seem compatible to me.

Where do you get that? OP says he was into butt stuff. Not everyone cup of tea, sure, but it's still a miles-long leap from that to exploitation.