Autistic burn out, and having to accomplish daily task

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Cloudman
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13 Jan 2020, 7:09 am

For some reason ever since I was young I felt just exhausted.i want to know if others on the spectrum get very warn out. I've researched burn out and think it has something to do with that. I've wondered is there anything to help


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TimS1980
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13 Jan 2020, 3:30 pm

Yes!

I was in a "learn or die" sort of place after burn out threatened my capacity to work.

Predating my diagnosis, my recovery began when I read Peak Performance by Brad Stulberg and Steve Magness.

Before then, I was unsatisfied with my progress, unwilling to give up, and thus pushing myself to greater effort.

I despaired when my capacity to go on and do more seemed to dry up.

What I found I needed was "permission to rest", embodied in a higher quality set of ideas about how to support my higher levels of performance, and avoid burning out.

Check out the book. It's on dead tree and Audible.

Personally, when even my capacity to read books was impacted, I still got a lot of value from audio books.


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pyrrhicwren
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13 Jan 2020, 10:13 pm

I'm trying to add exercise/cardio to give myself more capacity. Agree with both previous posts. I've pushed myself way too far and never took a real break until I was completely usueless.



blooiejagwa
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13 Jan 2020, 11:05 pm

Yes lifelong problem
Pushing your wellbeing above the other things +
asking ppl to accommodate n help n understand when possible...
'Its harder for me than it is for u... My brain cant handle it ive tried please break ot down for me.. Please help..
'
Youre not whining you are advocating n being honest


Cant advise anything beyond but just hope ppl help in your life n also that u get more rest/breaks


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JPER1980
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14 Jan 2020, 5:15 am

Sometimes this can come from people living well outside their comfort zone. If a person pushes themselves constantly is can be very draining.



Cloudman
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14 Jan 2020, 7:02 am

TimS1980 wrote:
Yes!

I was in a "learn or die" sort of place after burn out threatened my capacity to work.

Predating my diagnosis, my recovery began when I read Peak Performance by Brad Stulberg and Steve Magness.

Before then, I was unsatisfied with my progress, unwilling to give up, and thus pushing myself to greater effort.

I despaired when my capacity to go on and do more seemed to dry up.

What I found I needed was "permission to rest", embodied in a higher quality set of ideas about how to support my higher levels of performance, and avoid burning out.

Check out the book. It's on dead tree and Audible.

Personally, when even my capacity to read books was impacted, I still got a lot of value from audio books.

I see that does suck when you want to work but your body just can't. Good you pulled through. Hmm interesting I'll check that book out. Thanks I've also found that if you do things in short burst or while you're doing a boring task its easier however it will still zap your energy I say worse because your mind is doing more it's a trade off


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Cloudman
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14 Jan 2020, 7:13 am

pyrrhicwren wrote:
I'm trying to add exercise/cardio to give myself more capacity. Agree with both previous posts. I've pushed myself way too far and never took a real break until I was completely usueless.

Nice I'm taking a similar approach. Learning languages to increase my social capacity. I think it's a matter of wholeness if we do these things without considering everything else we risk over working, ex you had a long day of work and still exercise for very long even if you spent the whole day thinking that's still activity we must priorities its our autistic laser, and take care of our health


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aquafelix
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14 Jan 2020, 7:18 am

Cloudman wrote:
For some reason ever since I was young I felt just exhausted.i want to know if others on the spectrum get very warn out. I've researched burn out and think it has something to do with that. I've wondered is there anything to help

YES! That's pretty much how I've felt most of my life until I pushed too hard and ended up in a psychiatric hospital for a month. Pushing too much for too long has consequences. I'm still learning how to do that but I saw a meme that sums up my current philosophy

"Increase success by lowering expectations".



Confused_Sloth
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15 Jan 2020, 1:29 pm

That's my life too, I went to school, came home, collapsed exhausted. I never knew how people had energy for after-school activities, clubs, and all that.


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Juliette
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15 Jan 2020, 6:45 pm

Hi Cloudman - as aquafelix wrote "pushing too much for too long has consequences". I was a workaholic for many years, working 6 days a week, long hours, and wound up with pneumonia and then pleurisy, needing 3 months to recover. You need to ensure a balance of work and life/play, which is difficult, and only later did I realise I could allow myself a 4 day week to breathe... Made a huge difference. I love what they're doing in Denmark https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2017/03/denmark-best-work-life-balance-oecd/



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15 Jan 2020, 7:08 pm

The problem I found is that once you hit burnout, it taoes a long time to recover from it, and I found I was weakened to hitting further burnouts where I went on a downhill spiral.

I mostly hit further burnouts because while I knew I needed a big rest, others did not believe me and loaded me with tasks. I became a free dogsbody and was not able to say no as they would work on my Mum who would say yes on my behalf. At one time I found I had more rest taking on a part time job even though I was getting ultra stressed working.

I reached a point where I can no longer work and even struggle to do my own little tasks like get my own bicycle up and running. Something I used to do in minutes now takes me months.

I never realized how much time it takes to recover and how much I needed to destress. (And I have found the more I try to destress, the more circumstances load on new stresses onto me).


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Juliette
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15 Jan 2020, 7:19 pm

MG, I hope that it can be gently yet firmly conveyed to the people who don't quite understand your situation, just how important it is that you are given the rest and the break that you need. This sounds like a case of "They know not what they do" to you, meaning well from what you've said in the past. In fact, they think they're doing you a favour and helping you. But, it needs to be made clear that your external health does not reflect your internal health. That, you are essentially on a precipice...



Mountain Goat
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15 Jan 2020, 8:11 pm

Had worse many times.


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blooiejagwa
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15 Jan 2020, 9:07 pm

Confused_Sloth wrote:
That's my life too, I went to school, came home, collapsed exhausted. I never knew how people had energy for after-school activities, clubs, and all that.


it depends, some clubs actually revive and replenish you. it's awful to be there initially, but then it becomes great.


the one after school club i regularly attended was the Improv Club at one of my schools, highly recommend improv clubs....
it was too much fun, i rarely participated -- i could barely speak! ('selective' mutism) but they still included me.
that did so much to remove the stress of the rest of the week.
just to be included in something fun.

the kids were BRILLIANT - awesome - haven't seen such a spontaneous display of talent, good humour, entertainment, and imagination anywhere else! really those kids were great!

anyway, that club only met once a week, so it was easy to attend. i think that's the case for most schools with an improv club - it's not daily.

well worth it, it really energizes a person for the rest of the week, just enough to keep going!
it was like a fuel tank, not draining.

if it was daily, i would be the happiest person at school, even if everything else about school was difficult for me, i'd be happy.

seriously those kids were the BEST. we were in a mainly rural area that was slowly growing--
and the kids were amazingly fun, funny, witty, kind and nice, compared to my experience in other areas.

i think rural kids have better minds, maybe. the fresh air, maybe it makes people less sour.

or maybe since a lot of the rural kids are in 4H clubs they have healthier ways of relating to each other since they already connect over things like horse-riding.

at the other schools, i would join clubs and be so drained - i just went because my mom wouldn't let me quit.

but anyway my point is that improv clubs are very good even for asd-ers!! !

just the energy and fun is healthy. it actually takes away from the stress.
you can just watch or give ideas, don't have to act if you don't want to.

it's as close as i ever got to proper socializing, but better for my brain.


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Cloudman
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16 Jan 2020, 7:39 am

Juliette wrote:
Hi Cloudman - as aquafelix wrote "pushing too much for too long has consequences". I was a workaholic for many years, working 6 days a week, long hours, and wound up with pneumonia and then pleurisy, needing 3 months to recover. You need to ensure a balance of work and life/play, which is difficult, and only later did I realise I could allow myself a 4 day week to breathe... Made a huge difference. I love what they're doing in Denmark https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2017/03/denmark-best-work-life-balance-oecd/

Your right you may have saved me. I had this idea in my head I need to work more more and more, but the reality is l need balance our bodies can only handle so much and I think people with asd really do things throughly. This adds to the load, it's not the asd person's fault they it's how there brain works


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