childish
I have heard, many a time, when getting into a debate or discussion. I wind myself up, near a meltdown...I 'lose' the plot? My emotions take over..and that is when they hurl abuse at me by saying; "You act like an 8-year-old. I have seen it recently in a Netflix movie, and I went down memory lane, so I began to wonder, what is it that makes them call us childish? And is this typical an insult for an Asperger..how many of you here, have been called childish. And maybe I am a split personality, I just cannot seem to separate the immature self from the mature intellectual that I am...when they say that, it really stings...The last time I was called that was when I was an English instructor.
A colleague and I debated about noise-he made some, and kept me on my toes. Is it the emotional thing that they cannot handle and think is the temperament of a child that throws tantrums. Is that why so many children are attracted to me because they feel I still am a kid inside? Are neurotypicals more mature or is it all pretend?
Last year my sister called me childish, because I had dare to ask for an explanation as to why she finished her letter with 2 kisses xx, and I had sent 3...wheter she had actually opted for 2 kisses and not 3 and why...and so on...details, yes...
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Your Aspie score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 48 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
Children have not yet learned how to handle their emotions, so they get really upset and have outbursts and tantrums. So yes, if your emotions "take over" and you have a meltdown, people see that as something a child would do. They don't understand that a meltdown is not the same thing as a tantrum, they don't understand that something called alexithymia can make it difficult to handle emotions, etc.
Another aspect is that you might be insisting on being right. Try to listen to someone else's point of view, don't interrupt, don't talk over someone so they get to speak. I have done all these things in the past and some people used to get angry with me.
Another thing you might be doing that isn't appreciated is being overly prepared. You have your whole argument already formed in your mind and nobody is going to change your opinion. So the debate is one-sided - so to someone else, it is a waste of their time. You end up talking at them, not to them. Again, I've been guilty of this in the past.
A colleague and I debated about noise-he made some, and kept me on my toes. Is it the emotional thing that they cannot handle and think is the temperament of a child that throws tantrums. Is that why so many children are attracted to me because they feel I still am a kid inside? Are neurotypicals more mature or is it all pretend?
Last year my sister called me childish, because I had dare to ask for an explanation as to why she finished her letter with 2 kisses xx, and I had sent 3...wheter she had actually opted for 2 kisses and not 3 and why...and so on...details, yes...
_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
Hi. Thank you all for the responses...which I find to be somewhat clarifying. Especially the last one. Ralph, I never heard about the limbic thing. But what I know is that in furiates a lot of people.
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Your Aspie score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 48 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
We also tend to be very young socially as well since our social areas of the brain develop differently also. I am about 10-12 socially. And I will never get older in my social and emotional ages. It is not possible for me to age in those areas no matter how badly neurotypicals might want or need me to for their comfort and convenience.
People who cannot understand this concept insist that we are acting immaturely on purpose just to annoy them. They cannot understand that we have no choice in this. It would be like telling a intellectually disabled or mentally ret*d person that he is acting immaturely on purpose just to annoy people around him.
It is most difficult if you are "high functioning" because if you are, people are very reluctant to believe or accept that parts of your brain actually have not developed as would match your chronogical age. They expect you to match your chronological age in every area of functioning but it is impossible for you to do that. That is part of what the definition of a developmental disability is.
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"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
[/quote]It could perhaps be because you might have the limbic system of a child. There was an autopsy research project done by Dr Margaret Bowman (might be spelling that wrong) where they had studied Autistic brains next to non Autistic brains. They found that the limbic systems of the Autistic brains had too many neurons and they were too small making them like the limbic systems of children. They Limbic system is a huge part of the emotional brain and that is why we stay very young emotionally.[/quote]
I would love to read that study, I am really interested in how our brains are actually physically different from NT's or whatever you call non-us humans. I wonder what would cause there to be more neurons...like something we are born with or something that happened...
I would love to read that study, I am really interested in how our brains are actually physically different from NT's or whatever you call non-us humans. I wonder what would cause there to be more neurons...like something we are born with or something that happened...[/quote]I will find the YouTube link for you
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"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
Another thing you might be doing that isn't appreciated is being overly prepared. You have your whole argument already formed in your mind and nobody is going to change your opinion. So the debate is one-sided - so to someone else, it is a waste of their time. You end up talking at them, not to them. Again, I've been guilty of this in the past.
I know these symptoms well. It has taken me decades to learn how to tamp that down.
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The river is the melody
And sky is the refrain - Gordon Lightfoot
dragonsanddemons
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Joined: 19 Mar 2011
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I can’t recall ever being called childish, but I do certainly feel childlike. In some ways, I am still like a child, but in others I seem to be far more mature than most NTs can ever hope to be over the course of their lifetimes. I place my typical emotional age around 10.
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Yet in my new wildness and freedom I almost welcome the bitterness of alienage. For although nepenthe has calmed me, I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men.
-H. P. Lovecraft, "The Outsider"
Here it the youtube link to the study I mentioned earlier about the limbic system of the brain being younger for Autistics. It's a very old study but it holds none the less.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o6KYIw2yww
_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
I am so glad it helped you understand a new perspective. When I first saw it and then researched more about it, there is not much more documented other than her study, but her study is powerful, it also really helped me understand what is actually going on. I am so glad that this study is out there for us to see it. It is very documented that many of us are emotionally very young but this is the first medical brain documentation I have seen explaining it.
_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph