I'm an empath. And it's a struggle.

Post Reply New Topic

2 weeks ago, I saw an episode of the Investigation Discovery show "Forbidden: Dying for Love" where a teen couple has to hide their relationship from the girls father. They can't see each other outside of their ty-kwon-do class tha they're both in. The dad, an egyptian, plans on taking her to Egypt after she graduates to "marry her off". Specifically to a 47 year old. The couple plan on running away and even better, her mom brings her and her sister out of the state, but inexplicably brings them back, where the girls face their father again and are both killed. Before that, knowing she's about to die, she makes one last call to her boyfriend, who desperately begs her not to go until she hangs up. His mom is touching his shoulder as this is happening, there's sad music playing, it shows a reeanactment of her walking into the house, and then actual audio of her sister calling 911(after she got shot and was dying).

After I saw that, I was shook up and it's had an affect on my mental health since. Sometimes I feel like I am literally in the shoes of either the boyfriend and/or the 2 girls and it doesn't help that I was in a relationship with a girl with strict parents a year and a half ago(it wasn't this crazy, but still), so I also think about how sad it must've been for them
even before the murders happened because of the restrictions in their relationship that they had to deal with.

That whole thing is not the only thing that makes me feel like I'm the person dealing with stuff. Lately there's been times where I feel like I'm a HS senior who won't have a normal graduation this year. I literally feel the pain of couples who aren't able to see each other right now because of the virus. Even while I went on a long drive, played MLB the Show and thought about getting a dirtbike today, none of it helped.

Earlier tonight I realized that all those feelings are probably because I am an "empath". There's been countless times in the past where this has affected me. Does anyone else have this problem? I don't know of anyone who does besides myself.

You are not an 'empath', just easily provoked emotionally.

You might want to stay away from all those dramas they show on TV.

I have that “problem” to a certain degree—but I might be too selfish to let it affect me too much most of the time.

I realize that I, myself, cannot take care of the whole world. But that I should do the best I can to alleviate the sorrow of those whom I see on an everyday basis. And also to seek, in my own way, to help “the world” in general.

I seek my own pleasure, while seeking to care as much as possible about the plights of other people. I seek simple pleasures that don’t cost others.

Be careful about the labels.
Anyone can react empathically (overt or not) but that doesn't necessarily mean they are empaths. Those are two different things.
An empath can sense things "illogically"; one without visible and audible 'cues' to provoke them, only to find it can be confirmed and exists. To figure they are one requires serious levels of discernment.


I turned out to be an empath myself -- I'd know how 'illogical' it actually is.
I couldn't even accept it because I don't act and never fit in with the teary-eyed vulnerable soft-hearted social and selfless stereotype.
I'd know myself enough to discern whether it's 'me, my reactions and sympathies/unsympathetics', 'my head and data projections of appropriate reaction according to cues', or actually something else if I'm not overwhelmed with other 'noises' start with.
It had nothing to do with 'personalities', 'preferences' or what I 'believe' to be.


I don't deal with the same issue.
While I can sense what 'longing romance' is from a person in front of me if they are expressing it or sensing them nearby sympathizing from elsewhere..
The feeling of 'longing romance' is not who I'm, and not something I appreciate nor naturally sympathize when seeing it elsewhere.



True empath or not;
I suggest research about emotional regulation and discernment, which helps in terms of dealing with sensitivities and reaction in long terms.
Whatever it is affecting you, find a way to process it, express it, and then resolve it and move on.
If cooling off doesn't work; Digesting things that affects mental health may take time, but how one want it and which would work depends on the individual.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

I don't watch movies with intense psychological drama like you describe, or scary movies or movies with a lot of violence. I can't even watch Jurassic Park, for example. The first time T rex comes on the screen, I am gone.

There has been so much drama and so many scary things in my life, I don't need to watch movies like that any more at all.

But I am not an empath. I am just someone who has experienced so much of that IRL I don't need to watch it and get upset all over again.

You might want to take the EQ (Empathy Quotient) test to determine if you do have higher-than-average levels of empathy.

I feel highly empathetic as well, but my score on the test was very low. I believe I got 13 or something like that.

https://psychology-tools.com/test/empathy-quotient

Sympathy and empathy are two different things. It seems you have a lot of sympathy for others, which is a noble trait to have. Stay away from stories which will upset you because it's easy to feel emotionally traumatised when we feel emotions from fictitious characters, but we can't fix their problems, or give them emotional support.

Isabella, 97% of the things I've watched are real life stories, not fiction.

That's why I seldom watch anything on TV, or any movies. I have to vet the characters and stories first to make sure I can handle any emotions I'll encounter. If they're safe I will watch them on repeat for years with DVD box sets. Otherwise I can't just sit down and watch something new, or take my chances. There are only a handful of TV shows I can tolerate, and true crime / cop shows are absolutely off limits. I can't even watch cartoons like Sleeping Beauty, because of the violent dragon scene. There are even some adverts that make me cry, or give me trauma flashbacks. It's a dog-eat-dog world in the media so I stay away as much as possible.

Strangely enough I do like DEXTER ... but I couldn't make it through to the end. It got to be too much.

^With the Star Trek connection, I think that this is an appropriate response to that thought.