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A life lesson for the active guys here: never chase.

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XFilesGeek
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23 Sep 2020, 7:36 pm

Prolife tip: some women want to be "chased." These women are typically narcissistic and immature.

In almost every case, most women who say they aren't interested aren't interested, and by continuing to pursue them you are going to make yourself look like a creep.

FOB is correct. Don't waste time with women who show no interest.


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cyberdad
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23 Sep 2020, 9:39 pm

XFilesGeek wrote:
Prolife tip: some women want to be "chased." These women are typically narcissistic and immature.

In almost every case, most women who say they aren't interested aren't interested, and by continuing to pursue them you are going to make yourself look like a creep.

FOB is correct. Don't waste time with women who show no interest.


I don't think this is necessarily correct for all NT women. Almost all NT couples I know (including my parents) the man had to chase the girl and the girl played hard to get.

At least for NT females when a man approaches them first the general response from the girl is to be neutral (or in the case of my mother and sister show no interest). More times than not the male has to make some effort to win over the girl.

There are cases where a man meets girl and the girl agrees to have a drink and it leads to coffee/dates/sex/relationships but given males get rejected more times than get a positive response I doubt its that common.



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23 Sep 2020, 10:24 pm

Chasing is a bad idea. I learned a long time ago you are better off with a girl who is crazy about you then one you have to chase and if you catch them they expect you to kiss their feet lol and end up trying to control you.


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cyberdad
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23 Sep 2020, 10:40 pm

Brehus wrote:
Chasing is a bad idea. I learned a long time ago you are better off with a girl who is crazy about you then one you have to chase and if you catch them they expect you to kiss their feet lol and end up trying to control you.


Yes that's ideal. But for most men we have to do the chasing.

I chased my wife between 1998 and 2003.



cberg
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23 Sep 2020, 10:50 pm

Maybe I should split the difference between these viewpoints & just figure on everyone being crazy for reasons unrelated to most others around them, including myself.

:shrug: Medical experts say not to go near anyone anyway. I feel there might be more good faith to go around someday when we can all visit each other again.


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23 Sep 2020, 10:58 pm

kitten_caboodle wrote:
I don't know many men who chase to be honest. Usually they are shy and intimidated or else they wait for the other person to make the first move because they don't know how. I like guys to make the first move at getting to know someone, but chasing would be really creepy.


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So, coffee and cake? :mrgreen:



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23 Sep 2020, 11:01 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
kitten_caboodle wrote:
I don't know many men who chase to be honest. Usually they are shy and intimidated or else they wait for the other person to make the first move because they don't know how. I like guys to make the first move at getting to know someone, but chasing would be really creepy.


Aren't you self contradicting?

Maybe you're taking the word 'chasing' too literally I guess ; it's figurative, not like a lion chasing a deer.

Chasing in my context = first move(s).


Sorry, fishman.
To me "chasing" means when the "prey" is on the move, away from "you".

First move = the first approach.
Chasing happens after that. 8)

kitten_caboodle wrote:
I didn't word that very well. I meant they shouldn't be obvious about it over a long period of time if the person clearly isn't interested or said no. Don't keep staring at them, flirting with them or making them uncomfortable after the first (or second?) try.


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You mean like what I am doing now? :scratch: :mrgreen:



cyberdad
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23 Sep 2020, 11:06 pm

At the moment the only thing doing the chasing is COVID-19 :lol:



Pepe
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23 Sep 2020, 11:09 pm

cyberdad wrote:
At the moment the only thing doing the chasing is COVID-19 :lol:


Too right.

Has anyone else noticed how a beautiful woman isn't that beautiful anymore, now that we have to factor in the possibility of death into the equation? :scratch:

I don't seem to have any male "Praying Mantis" DNA in me. 8O



XFilesGeek
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25 Sep 2020, 2:10 am

cyberdad wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
Prolife tip: some women want to be "chased." These women are typically narcissistic and immature.

In almost every case, most women who say they aren't interested aren't interested, and by continuing to pursue them you are going to make yourself look like a creep.

FOB is correct. Don't waste time with women who show no interest.


I don't think this is necessarily correct for all NT women. Almost all NT couples I know (including my parents) the man had to chase the girl and the girl played hard to get.

At least for NT females when a man approaches them first the general response from the girl is to be neutral (or in the case of my mother and sister show no interest). More times than not the male has to make some effort to win over the girl.

There are cases where a man meets girl and the girl agrees to have a drink and it leads to coffee/dates/sex/relationships but given males get rejected more times than get a positive response I doubt its that common.


No, the vast majority of women who say they are not interested aren't interested.

Men who feel the need to pester and badger women are just going to come across as creeps.


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cyberdad
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25 Sep 2020, 2:27 am

XFilesGeek wrote:
No, the vast majority of women who say they are not interested aren't interested.

Men who feel the need to pester and badger women are just going to come across as creeps.


I don't actually dispute that....but...a surprising number of men are married to women whom said no the first time,



magz
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25 Sep 2020, 2:37 am

cyberdad wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
No, the vast majority of women who say they are not interested aren't interested.

Men who feel the need to pester and badger women are just going to come across as creeps.


I don't actually dispute that....but...a surprising number of men are married to women whom said no the first time,

I think we need to understand the distinction between
"I like you but I won't <go to a date / sleep with you / marry you / ...>"
vs
"I'm not interested, leave me alone."


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cyberdad
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25 Sep 2020, 2:43 am

magz wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
No, the vast majority of women who say they are not interested aren't interested.

Men who feel the need to pester and badger women are just going to come across as creeps.


I don't actually dispute that....but...a surprising number of men are married to women whom said no the first time,

I think we need to understand the distinction between
"I like you but I won't <go to a date / sleep with you / marry you / ...>"
vs
"I'm not interested, leave me alone."


I imagine since the #Metoo movement started men are less inclined to pursue but that certainly was not the case in the past.



magz
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25 Sep 2020, 4:19 am

My culture finds meetoo rarely relatable. In general, women are expected to be assertive and men are expected to respect women, at least in the environments where I live.


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cyberdad
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25 Sep 2020, 4:41 am

All its done is make the mating game more confusing for everyone.



XFilesGeek
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25 Sep 2020, 6:09 am

cyberdad wrote:
magz wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
No, the vast majority of women who say they are not interested aren't interested.

Men who feel the need to pester and badger women are just going to come across as creeps.


I don't actually dispute that....but...a surprising number of men are married to women whom said no the first time,

I think we need to understand the distinction between
"I like you but I won't <go to a date / sleep with you / marry you / ...>"
vs
"I'm not interested, leave me alone."


I imagine since the #Metoo movement started men are less inclined to pursue but that certainly was not the case in the past.


I imagine much of the MeToo movement was sprung from the men who wouldn't take no for an answer.


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