I think I may be a racist, but I'm not sure

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I grew up in a racist household--it was really terrible. I joined Match.com with a friend who has recently become single and in the course of an otherwise routine conversation, I told her that I liked White guys. She hasn't really communicated with me since then, but I am pretty sure she thinks that the next time we meet, I'll be wearing a white sheet with a conical white head covering.

I really haven't dated other ethnicities because I was single in high school, then had a long-distance relationship with and later married my boyfriend from high school. My boyfriends prior to my husband were all basically white because that is who I had classes with and asked me out. So the men I'm attracted to currently all fall in the "white" category.

I have had lots of friends from other countries--it's actually easier for me to make friends with someone from another culture--but I haven't gone out with them. So, again, my preference is based on my dating history.

Does anyone else have this problem? I have another friend who only likes Black men--for whatever reason, people are not bothered by her preference. Not really sure what to do about this. I guess I can try to find someone from another culture and date them, but that seems horribly unfair--I wouldn't want someone to do that to me (actually, I've had guys with Asian fetishes ask me out).

And I'm not actually attracted to most people (male or female) so there is that problem, as well.

Please be kind in your responses.

This is not racism at all. First I will say that it is actually natural to try to choose ones partner to be by selecting a person one can most relate to, and one usually relates to people of ones own race. This is not racism at all. Racism is treating someone who is of a different race in a negative way compared to how you treat someone of your own race.

Only being attracted to people of a specific race is absolutely not racist. If you were deliberately picking white men over non-white, simply because they’re white, that is, but it doesn’t sound like that’s what you’re doing at all.

the OP is entitled to her preferences, no harm is being done.

I don’t think you’re a racist.

Have you ever had a crush on somebody, say, on TV, who is non-white?

This. You're not a racist just because the men you've had interest in have happened to be white. If someone who was not white showed interest in you and you rejected them immediately because they're not white, then that would be racist, but rejecting them for some other trait doesn't make you a racist.

What Fireblossom said. Additionally, while we all are susceptible to racial biases due to our cultural background, full-fledged racists usually know what they are and are even proud of it. They are people who truly, consciously think that white people are superior and non-white people are lesser and the way we treat others should reflect that.

IMO, the very fact that you worry about having racial biases and consider such biases problems, shows that you are not racist.

This.

Also, your sexual attraction is not something everyone around you deserves equally. It's okay to have weirdest preferences.

Bear in mind that this below is just humour and not to be taken seriously.