Who Here Has A Friend They Love? (or has had)

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funeralxempire
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22 Aug 2020, 2:21 am

This is something that I believe creates a problem for us on spectrum, especially males. We're conditioned to express certain emotions in certain ways and it hurts us and deprives us of meaningful and fulfilling relationships.

i might be turnt :clown:


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cyberdad
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22 Aug 2020, 2:23 am

Are you talking about friends of the same gender?



BenderRodriguez
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22 Aug 2020, 2:44 am

Are you talking about someone you love and can't "open up" or reach out to in a conventional or effective way? Or your lack of "appropriate" emotional expression preventing you from bonding with people?


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funeralxempire
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22 Aug 2020, 2:59 am

cyberdad wrote:
Are you talking about friends of the same gender?



Not inherently, i mean platonic in general?


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Raleigh
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22 Aug 2020, 3:09 am

I love all of my friends.
It's never been a problem


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BenderRodriguez
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22 Aug 2020, 3:36 am

Raleigh wrote:
I love all of my friends.
It's never been a problem


You're right - overanalysing mode disengaged.

I do, even if a few of them are dead.


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Raleigh
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22 Aug 2020, 3:44 am

BenderRodriguez wrote:

I do, even if a few of them are dead.

They're the ones I love most.


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cyberdad
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22 Aug 2020, 4:24 am

well then the answer is no...never loved a friend



dragonsanddemons
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22 Aug 2020, 1:40 pm

Platonic love, yes, absolutely, I still care about and miss every single one (not that that’s a very long list :oops: ). Romantic love... I’m still trying to figure out whether I’m actually capable of feeling that at all or not.


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Teach51
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22 Aug 2020, 1:51 pm

I think that nothing is ever final. I know male aspies who are in therapy and their attachment ability and social interactions have improved, it can be done.
Acknowledging that there may be a problem is the first step to change.


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The_Walrus
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22 Aug 2020, 3:35 pm

I’ve had friends who I could honestly say I loved. My difficulty has been in maintaining those relationships. I have an autistic friend with learning difficulties who is very clingy to the point of harassment (fortunately most people are understanding even if they are irritated) and I’m very anxious about mirroring that behaviour.



blazingstar
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22 Aug 2020, 5:30 pm

I have had platonic friends, both female and male. I love them dearly. They are no longer in my life, have moved on, etc. And I think that the relationships were extremely important to me, being that I rarely had friends, but were not particularly impactful on the lives of the people who were my friends. I don't know if that sentence makes sense or not.

I made the best and closest friends in graduate school. I had more male friends than female friends at that time and it was not generally understood by others that the relationships were platonic. This caused some distress to me, because I was always being misinterpreted.


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Sahn
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22 Aug 2020, 5:32 pm

I love my best friend, I've known him my entire life. We had lunch today.



Wolfram87
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22 Aug 2020, 5:35 pm

I love my friends. One in particular is a brother from another mother to me (I'm fuzzy on the details, but I'm pretty sure our mothers met in the maternity ward and are still friends.). Some friends have moved away and I haven't seen them for a long time, but I love them all the same.


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kraftiekortie
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22 Aug 2020, 5:36 pm

I’ve never had a Platonic friend whom I have loved.



Feyokien
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22 Aug 2020, 5:42 pm

Only my wife and my siblings. So no.