Getting really tired of this.

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I suppose there's got to be something more attainable than an Aston Martin which gets the same cool points.

But then it also helps to be getting my job back sooner or later.

Not that doing so makes it easier to interact with humans however, it could take up all my time eventually.

Kyalami Green Audi TT for your time.

Well it's Wednesday again & nothing has been happening for well over two days. The only thing on my to do list yet is rebuilding laptops but I already bought a really fast one also and I did my taxes so now nothing particularly matters ATM except killing time. At least my friend got some new robots at work.

It's almost hacker retail therapy time. Only $1800 for now to bump myself up to 60GB of video RAM between two GPUs. Triple 4K displays & a big desk may have to wait but I'm not sure if I have room for all this stuff here in the first place.

You can all bet my monitor tan will be leveling up soon no matter what.


(quoting myself for contextual ramblings)

I guess the answer is probably something to do with more techno. To be more descriptive though, I think there has to be some kind of middle ground here between what everyone thinks of as the 'humanities' and the strange logical no-man's-land that is computing. I guess I should get out of my house sometime today.

This seems to be the thread where I post about basically anything but the actual subject, although only because the monotony of not dealing with it IRL makes it weird to think about.

Not that my life was at a cliffhanger or anything, if anything I'm just stupidly anxious about the return to quasi-normality that is being employed again.

No one else is online, I guess I'll be in the bar thread again sooner or later.

^ the real shocker with that is that cars are (relatively) expensive purchases, so those aren't toys for kids... Yet they look like them. That's gonna be an adult getting in and driving that thing. Can you imagine?

It's been quite some time since I really viewed adults as all that grown up, so to speak. For me looking a bit ridiculous merely comes with the territory of living in a largely unbelievable society. I pay taxes, work, study, drive & pretend I'm twelve, I guess it's for the relative peace of mind.

I think one of the few counterpoints here is the insane volume of work it takes to have much of any fun these days.

I sort of get the sense that most people are on the fence about this.

Full disclosure, I should be doing unemployment paperwork in another window right now but I'm back to work tomorrow anyway & you're all cooler than a vast unassailable bureaucracy stringing me along with pennies, carrots & sticks.

I think that while materialism is a poor substitute for more or less any kind of real interaction, sometimes it's justified if the end result makes people happy somehow. I guess that's why people can relate to design emotionally, or just make puns with machines.

I'm not really into muscle cars though, machismo isn't my thing unless it has some purpose to serve. I guess I see the point of arbitrarily assigning gender to designs but I think some things transcend... whatever. Nobody said I can't post car porn so here's a Vanquish Zagato Shooting Brake to distract everyone from my ramblings:

Happy Monday everyone!

I paid my water bill & nothing else happened yet. I guess we're wrapping up the quarantine old-school where I supposedly work instead of picking up any slack whatsoever around here. My job was supposed to start again...

Bleh, I miss people.

I guess I've been hiding out in this thread more lately when I consider the way the rest of the forum is discussing L&D stuff. I sort of feel caught in some endless minefield of dos & don'ts whereas in my head I'm just wishing everyone in my life would chill out & talk more.

People's modern internet-buzzword-based interpretation of gender roles does nothing for me perceptually or otherwise. If anything I run afoul of a set of rules created by a society we're replacing with technology anyway, all the while the fact I've been associated with technology to this degree has been a whole other issue.

I guess what I'm getting at is that by this point, there is no quality of shyness on my part that I haven't had to work past at some point in my life, perhaps because I consider fear, uncertainty & doubt to be somewhat distinct from it. I also respect that most people's lives in general these days are too demanding & complicated for anyone to reasonably expect much of anything in particular.

If I'm boring any of you, feel free to request a return to our regular scheduled programming.

It does seem certain material things hit the right spot, like a satisfaction of a hobby or an interest, that's a good point of view. Especially to us I suppose certain things we can get attached to. We can enjoy them in our independent time.

I guess the main reason I've held onto this thread's grouchy title rather than starting another is twofold, for one thing it seems like I've been on an endless trip through the machine's world & this is something of an escape, on the other hand I think this is also something of a window into one human aspect of what I presume the rest of you view as an invisible electromechanical blob spanning the entire planet.

I think it must be tough for anyone to relate to my psyche being filled up to the eyeballs in logic, designs & abstracted code.

I cannot function without logic and knowledge of the human relations, on the other hand the only coding I care about is chatterbot code. Html is way too much to learn, I haven't even finished the beginner courses.

Many people on the spectrum actually have jobs that involve coding. But about the logic side, you're probably right seeing as most people don't apply it to a high enough level seeing as they are rooted in religious beliefs and not reality and proof.

Designs, there's a lot of creative people here.

Perhaps hiding from the masses isn't that useful in building relationships, but I am here and you're doing it knowingly, so.

Of course I wouldn't call bumping this thread exactly hiding.

Why are you not as social as you used to be, currently?

You seem to be completely lacking motivation to do job stuff and curriculum vitae stuff on a long-term basis, reminds me closely of yours truly. Even though you pack some useful skills for today's world. I don't want to sell meds anymore. Casheering is really not an autism friendly job.

You made many posts, it seems you are the one keeping this thread going actually which I have not seen before. However this first post is one that I can relate with.

I've been judge in absentia pretty often. Like, I'll think everything is going well with a woman, or even a male friend, and then abruptly, distancing or even ghosting, and I am left to cipher out what happened. Sometimes on rare occasion from someone especially socially gifted, I am informed of my transgression as it is framed, and this is viewed as a permanent behavioral characteristic rather than a mistake. People just feel like they have plenty of options nowadays and do not even think twice about jumping ship, ditching old acquaintances. Maybe things were different in Caveman era but that's the way the modern world works, perhaps we are Retro, a model better adapted to earlier times.

The only thing I do is keep trying, because odds are, eventually you will meet someone motivated to stick around. The alternative is just be content being alone, which is pretty easy but I think it would be like giving up. I feel like there are a lot of advantages to having friends due to the social stimulation and practice. The more people you are around, the better you can pass when you need to.

Actually I'm working at the same place again tomorrow, even if it is just part-time. At least there may be a hackathon involving a project I finished my internship with.

I guess I've been been more withdrawn from people than usual considering how much we're encouraged to second-guess based on our differences. Most other threads here lately have been meh...

I have no idea why I'm awake right now; cya later

I hope your area doesn’t get the blizzard they’re anticipating.

Heh at least I like blizzards anyway. The real bummer is that I'm working tomorrow without getting to set a higher rate, if anything actually happens that is. At most I'll fill out an I9 & pick up a speedy laptop.

Long term I think the trouble for me is that I actually have few plans outside of the career stuff, overall it's exhausting not knowing when I'll get a break I can actually do something with.

It's like living at a totally different pace relative to everything & most people I guess.