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lvpin
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07 Dec 2020, 8:01 am

Hi, awhile back I posted something about how I'm often babied and I think one user or perhaps several thought it was teasing. However recently it was suggested to me by a friend that I seem very vulnerable and come across as someone who needs to be protected. While I found it very funny to hear, it wasn't the first time I had been told that by a friend and it fits in with a lot of my life experiences. I also think I heard somewhere that autistic people can seem more innocent to others so I was just curious if anyone else had been told this about themselves or found that this correlated with how they are treated i everyday life?

From my experience I find that people my age tend to censor themselves when they talk to me and in the past experienced classmates being weirdly protective if someone upset me. I know it can be normal to have people come to your defence, but I didn't have many friends and just, having seen how they reacted with others, I could just tell the reaction wasn't necessarily normal. Of course on top that I am literally told I seem that way occasionally and apparently my resting face looks a little afraid which I can't help because I can't even tell, let alone change it. Oh well, it has upsides and downsides and is also a little funny.

Anyway I was just curious to see if anyone related. I'm so happy I have a place like this where I can ask others like me : )



KT67
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07 Dec 2020, 8:09 am

How tall are you and (if post 25) how many wrinkles do you have?

Aspies often look young for our age due to not eating much in childhood (sensory sensitivities) which makes us short and skinny and not using facial expressions in our adult life which makes us wrinkle free.

This being an autism site, I will have to point out the obvious which is that this isn't everyone.


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lvpin
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07 Dec 2020, 9:23 am

KT67 wrote:
How tall are you and (if post 25) how many wrinkles do you have?

Aspies often look young for our age due to not eating much in childhood (sensory sensitivities) which makes us short and skinny and not using facial expressions in our adult life which makes us wrinkle free.

This being an autism site, I will have to point out the obvious which is that this isn't everyone.


I'm 5 foot 10 and I actually had the opposite problem as a kid when it came to food. I couldn't feel if I was hungry or not so I over ate but I seem to be medium weight now. But yeah I believe I'm quite tall for a female an I know I got told in my assessment I have a few range of expressions but no one has seemed to notice irl. I only appear cold via message apparently. Not post 25 so as far as I can tell I'm wrinkle free haha



kitesandtrainsandcats
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07 Dec 2020, 10:39 am

I'm better than twice 25 years old and as recently as last year people guessed me as being in my 30s even though mustache and goatee are grey.
:D
(but then my 8th grade history teacher who was also one of the school's coaches was known to have his hair turn grey at 17)

And yes, even at this age there are occasions where people have acted toward me like I was a bit on the innocent and vulnerable side.

Odd, quite odd.


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Dear_one
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07 Dec 2020, 10:41 am

Your avatar looks very vulnerable with those huge, infant-like eyes.



Pieplup
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07 Dec 2020, 7:30 pm

lvpin wrote:
Hi, awhile back I posted something about how I'm often babied and I think one user or perhaps several thought it was teasing. However recently it was suggested to me by a friend that I seem very vulnerable and come across as someone who needs to be protected. While I found it very funny to hear, it wasn't the first time I had been told that by a friend and it fits in with a lot of my life experiences. I also think I heard somewhere that autistic people can seem more innocent to others so I was just curious if anyone else had been told this about themselves or found that this correlated with how they are treated i everyday life?

From my experience I find that people my age tend to censor themselves when they talk to me and in the past experienced classmates being weirdly protective if someone upset me. I know it can be normal to have people come to your defence, but I didn't have many friends and just, having seen how they reacted with others, I could just tell the reaction wasn't necessarily normal. Of course on top that I am literally told I seem that way occasionally and apparently my resting face looks a little afraid which I can't help because I can't even tell, let alone change it. Oh well, it has upsides and downsides and is also a little funny.

Anyway I was just curious to see if anyone related. I'm so happy I have a place like this where I can ask others like me : )
very few people think in innocent. Yes people tend to want to protect the innocent. I do this too. Im not saying you are but some people are just timelessly innocent. Its not really a bad thing. If you want to change that perception idk maybe do something different start cursing like a sailor or something. :lol:
Alot of autistic people have a certain naivety. This probably the reason autistic people seem to appear innocent. Also, If your broadcasting innocence via body language people are gonna notice. Well, thats on the internet people irl probably think im innocent. They dont know me though.


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Pepe
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07 Dec 2020, 7:37 pm

Dear_one wrote:
Your avatar looks very vulnerable with those huge, infant-like eyes.


You beat me to it. :mrgreen:

@OP: Many auties come across as being naive, partly because we tend to be open and honest. 8O

What a perverse world we live in. :?


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And one more thing,


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lvpin
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08 Dec 2020, 5:53 am

Pepe wrote:
Dear_one wrote:
Your avatar looks very vulnerable with those huge, infant-like eyes.


You beat me to it. :mrgreen:

@OP: Many auties come across as being naive, partly because we tend to be open and honest. 8O

What a perverse world we live in. :?


It's interesting you say that because I often get told by people that they have bonded with me really quickly and I think that is in part because I am very honest and open about things basically from the beginning. I do wait to say some of the ore sensitive information but I seem to not think the typical things are sensitive information.



Pepe
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08 Dec 2020, 6:08 am

lvpin wrote:
Pepe wrote:
Dear_one wrote:
Your avatar looks very vulnerable with those huge, infant-like eyes.


You beat me to it. :mrgreen:

@OP: Many auties come across as being naive, partly because we tend to be open and honest. 8O

What a perverse world we live in. :?


It's interesting you say that because I often get told by people that they have bonded with me really quickly and I think that is in part because I am very honest and open about things basically from the beginning. I do wait to say some of the ore sensitive information but I seem to not think the typical things are sensitive information.


You are also a woman.
You have the advantage when it comes to making friends. :wink:


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Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. "Go after people and not institutions; people hurt faster than institutions." I didn't say that. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,


"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet." Humour is not meant to be taken seriously, yet many on the left pervert its intent.
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)


THERE WILL BE NO COUP IN AMERIA!


Dear_one
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08 Dec 2020, 10:13 am

Pepe wrote:
lvpin wrote:
It's interesting you say that because I often get told by people that they have bonded with me really quickly and I think that is in part because I am very honest and open about things basically from the beginning. I do wait to say some of the ore sensitive information but I seem to not think the typical things are sensitive information.


You are also a woman.
You have the advantage when it comes to making friends. :wink:


My female physiotherapist used to talk over her business plans, etc. with me, and was bemused that she didn't confide in her other patients. I've heard quite a few "confessions," perhaps because I seem open-minded, non-judgemental, and not prone to gossip.



blazingstar
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08 Dec 2020, 7:25 pm

That used to happen to me a lot too. I used to wonder why people felt comfortable unburdening themselves to me (but no one was ever available to listen to me.)

Perhaps it was some aspie like innocence.


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lvpin
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09 Dec 2020, 12:04 pm

blazingstar wrote:
That used to happen to me a lot too. I used to wonder why people felt comfortable unburdening themselves to me (but no one was ever available to listen to me.)

Perhaps it was some aspie like innocence.


People do that to me a lot too! I tend to basically feel like a therapist sometimes but I don't mind when I'm in an ok mental state. More of a problem when I m not and feel too awkward to say anything.



KT67
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09 Dec 2020, 12:17 pm

lvpin wrote:
KT67 wrote:
How tall are you and (if post 25) how many wrinkles do you have?

Aspies often look young for our age due to not eating much in childhood (sensory sensitivities) which makes us short and skinny and not using facial expressions in our adult life which makes us wrinkle free.

This being an autism site, I will have to point out the obvious which is that this isn't everyone.


I'm 5 foot 10 and I actually had the opposite problem as a kid when it came to food. I couldn't feel if I was hungry or not so I over ate but I seem to be medium weight now. But yeah I believe I'm quite tall for a female an I know I got told in my assessment I have a few range of expressions but no one has seemed to notice irl. I only appear cold via message apparently. Not post 25 so as far as I can tell I'm wrinkle free haha


If you're a young woman, it could be that they've pegged you as a 'good girl' stereotype.

Patronising I know.


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lvpin
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09 Dec 2020, 3:38 pm

KT67 wrote:
lvpin wrote:
KT67 wrote:
How tall are you and (if post 25) how many wrinkles do you have?

Aspies often look young for our age due to not eating much in childhood (sensory sensitivities) which makes us short and skinny and not using facial expressions in our adult life which makes us wrinkle free.

This being an autism site, I will have to point out the obvious which is that this isn't everyone.


I'm 5 foot 10 and I actually had the opposite problem as a kid when it came to food. I couldn't feel if I was hungry or not so I over ate but I seem to be medium weight now. But yeah I believe I'm quite tall for a female an I know I got told in my assessment I have a few range of expressions but no one has seemed to notice irl. I only appear cold via message apparently. Not post 25 so as far as I can tell I'm wrinkle free haha


If you're a young woman, it could be that they've pegged you as a 'good girl' stereotype.

Patronising I know.


Maybe :'). I don't even like parties because they giv me panic attacks and I dress quite modestly. Still amuses me because while the two can coexist, I am also known to have quite morbid interests lol.



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09 Dec 2020, 10:29 pm

I imagine that I must seem very vulnerable to people at times. I'm short, I have a big belly, I wear high grade pull-ups and sometimes I wear my self-made German helmet. I guess that all those things would give me an adorable and vulnerable appearance.


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09 Dec 2020, 11:00 pm

I am often treated this way, in my case probably because it’s obvious to most people that I have some sort of developmental disability, I can’t “mask” to save my life. I tend to be treated more like a child and have had other females my age try to “mother” me. It’s funny because I’m basically the opposite of vulnerable and innocent (though I fully admit I’m very naive).

People don’t tell me secrets or anything, but they will talk to each other as if I’m not there, for example sharing very personal experiences with their friends when I’m right next to them and they’ve never spoken more than ten words to me. Either they trust me not to gossip, or they just plain forget I’m there.


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