Anybody familiar with the term "a private person?"

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JustFoundHere
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28 Feb 2021, 5:56 pm

Perspectives of being a private person:

Aside from small talk with familiar people (up until a year-ago - when the pandemic began), I periodically correspond by phone/email with family friends, and relatives. On occasions, we've briefly met in person.

Any experiences, and reconsideration for developing new friendships after pandemic is under control?



ASPartOfMe
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03 Mar 2021, 6:14 am

I know of the term.

There might be autistic support groups in or near where you live. Now they are meeting online but once the pandemic is over they will go back to in person. The closer to are to population centers the better chance there is some group that you can physically get to.


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JustFoundHere
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04 Mar 2021, 2:46 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:
I know of the term.

There might be autistic support groups in or near where you live. Now they are meeting online but once the pandemic is over they will go back to in person. The closer to are to population centers the better chance there is some group that you can physically get to.


From my experience, support groups usually maintains a short term interest; that is group members only attend a few sessions. For the longer-term, a therapist experienced with the Autism Spectrum proved most helpful.



ASPartOfMe
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05 Mar 2021, 7:10 am

JustFoundHere wrote:
ASPartOfMe wrote:
I know of the term.

There might be autistic support groups in or near where you live. Now they are meeting online but once the pandemic is over they will go back to in person. The closer to are to population centers the better chance there is some group that you can physically get to.


From my experience, support groups usually maintains a short term interest; that is group members only attend a few sessions. For the longer-term, a therapist experienced with the Autism Spectrum proved most helpful.

With a therapist you are their client, not their friend.

There is the advice I am sure you have heard many times to join groups dedicated to what interests you. Of course the NT-Autistic differences can get in the way.

It must be remembered that many online groups will revert back to in person groups once the pandemic is over so being online only should not necessarily be a deal breaker in deciding which groups to join.


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JustFoundHere
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05 Mar 2021, 2:06 pm

I've long felt that concrete activities going beyond High Functioning Autism (HFA) support groups, and even awesome therapists experienced with HFA might very well be beneficial for the private person esp. concerning the development of friendships.

In short, activities offering concrete opportunities for participants to unite around might "break the ice" so to speak! Arts related activities e.g., drawing, painting sculpture, etc. are indeed very concrete e.g., tactile, confidence boosting activities.

From my experience, I had a chance to become acquainted (not friendship wise) with arts instructors experienced with conducting arts classes for both developmentally disabled, and NTs alike - instructors who were also receptive to the concerns of HFA.

Such activities (and the development of arts programs) have been put on hold on account of a pandemic - yet considerations for what specifically can support such activities MUST remain active!



JustFoundHere
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12 Mar 2021, 2:40 pm

JustFoundHere wrote:
I've long felt that concrete activities going beyond High Functioning Autism (HFA) support groups, and even awesome therapists experienced with HFA might very well be beneficial for the private person esp. concerning the development of friendships.

In short, activities offering concrete opportunities for participants to unite around might "break the ice" so to speak! Arts related activities e.g., drawing, painting sculpture, etc. are indeed very concrete e.g., tactile, confidence boosting activities.

From my experience, I had a chance to become acquainted (not friendship wise) with arts instructors experienced with conducting arts classes for both developmentally disabled, and NTs alike - instructors who were also receptive to the concerns of HFA.

Such activities (and the development of arts programs) have been put on hold on account of a pandemic - yet considerations for what specifically can support such activities MUST remain active!


ADDENDUM:

One of the reasons why a private person (a private person on account of HFA) needs to develop friendships: What about the names of people to list on forms asking 'who to contact in case of emergency?'



JustFoundHere
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14 Mar 2021, 3:28 pm

JustFoundHere wrote:
JustFoundHere wrote:
I've long felt that concrete activities going beyond High Functioning Autism (HFA) support groups, and even awesome therapists experienced with HFA might very well be beneficial for the private person esp. concerning the development of friendships.

In short, activities offering concrete opportunities for participants to unite around might "break the ice" so to speak! Arts related activities e.g., drawing, painting sculpture, etc. are indeed very concrete e.g., tactile, confidence boosting activities.

From my experience, I had a chance to become acquainted (not friendship wise) with arts instructors experienced with conducting arts classes for both developmentally disabled, and NTs alike - instructors who were also receptive to the concerns of HFA.

Such activities (and the development of arts programs) have been put on hold on account of a pandemic - yet considerations for what specifically can support such activities MUST remain active!


ADDENDUM:

One of the reasons why a private person (a private person on account of HFA) needs to develop friendships: What about the names of people to list on forms asking 'who to contact in case of emergency?'


ADDENDUM:

From my own experiences, I sense that raising the issue of who to contact & trust in the event of emergencies yielded both hesitation and discouragement - again, "been there done that." Let's add, "we can change this!"

In participating in the 'In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Forum', we've become older and wiser (in a time where there is finally ample awareness of HFA), and are ripe for asking the hard questions to "break the ice so to speak."

For starters, let's reassess AS/NT relationships: I sense that both trusting NTs experienced with AS, and people with AS receptive to reaching-out to.............trusted NTs experienced with AS rarely connect.

For example, I had met a few trusted NTs experienced with AS in adults, and was stunned to learn that these NTs have only heard of WrongPlanet (yet have not made the time to participate on............WP). Granted, most of us have trouble understanding the dynamics of...........WP, yet WP is ripe to get those boosts on priority lists!

In a way, all of us (including myself, and AS, and NTs alike) are guilty of what may be described as that mix of complacency, confusion, and aversions in better understanding healthy AS/NT dynamics. - Hence, that self-fulfilling prophecy (that viscous cycle) presenting difficulties in "breaking the ice!"

One helpful small first step, with only about half a dozen or so responses in this thread (as of this writing), let's re-evaluate, and give additional feedback in this discussion thread!



JustFoundHere
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19 Mar 2021, 3:02 pm

I'll refrain from posting yet another 'ADDENDUM!'

Here is a LINK discussing concrete objectives important for a private person: WP discussion thread 'Reassessing AS/NT Friendships'

LINK: viewtopic.php?t=395386



JustFoundHere
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14 Apr 2021, 10:27 pm

Here is a LINK to a WP discussion thread on navigating a confusing WP environment, and acquaintances with people experienced with AS/NT Friendships as goals:

LINK: 'For NTs' viewtopic.php?t=395573



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15 May 2021, 5:08 pm

I'm very familiar with that term. Out of the three people in my pod of friendship, I'm the private one. I keep to myself on my free time and I don't bother with too many people. Dean and Barb have lots of friends outside the pod. Barb has the most. Dean and Barb are the friends that I have, but I wouldn't have it any other way.


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