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[ POLL ] Career or Family?

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Which would you choose?
A successful career, with no family. 30%  30%  [ 8 ]
A happy family, with no career. 70%  70%  [ 19 ]
Total votes : 27

IsabellaLinton
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06 Apr 2021, 7:52 pm

I earned a very high salary. Higher than most double-income families. I did it to provide a comfortable home as a single parent. My ex twaddled off and violated court orders. I liked my career, and took a lot of pride in my accomplishments, but my kids undoubtedly come first. That's why I did the job in the first place.


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cberg
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06 Apr 2021, 8:13 pm

Fnord wrote:
After reading through the previous answers, it seems to me that for upper management types, career comes before family, while for the average wage-earner, family comes before career.

Does anyone else see this?


I'm neither of these things, but I'm stuck with pretty average wages anyway. People are more important to me than my job(s) but I can only wish they would see things that way. Working conditions under today's social pressures are pretty rough on techies.


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magz
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07 Apr 2021, 1:12 am

Fnord wrote:
After reading through the previous answers, it seems to me that for upper management types, career comes before family, while for the average wage-earner, family comes before career.

Does anyone else see this?
I rather see people with children or wanting them seem to have more focus on family. But I'm sure there will be exceptions to this, too.

Sure, quality of your job and quality of your family are related to such preferences.


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Fnord
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07 Apr 2021, 8:18 am

magz wrote:
Fnord wrote:
After reading through the previous answers, it seems to me that for upper management types, career comes before family, while for the average wage-earner, family comes before career.  Does anyone else see this?
I rather see people with children or wanting them seem to have more focus on family. But I'm sure there will be exceptions to this, too.  Sure, quality of your job and quality of your family are related to such preferences.
If they are more than just correlations, I have to wonder which is the cause and which is the effect.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Apr 2021, 8:28 am

IsabellaLinton wrote:
I earned a very high salary. Higher than most double-income families. I did it to provide a comfortable home as a single parent. My ex twaddled off and violated court orders. I liked my career, and took a lot of pride in my accomplishments, but my kids undoubtedly come first. That's why I did the job in the first place.



You are a surgeon if I recall right.



IsabellaLinton
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07 Apr 2021, 8:50 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
I earned a very high salary. Higher than most double-income families. I did it to provide a comfortable home as a single parent. My ex twaddled off and violated court orders. I liked my career, and took a lot of pride in my accomplishments, but my kids undoubtedly come first. That's why I did the job in the first place.



You are a surgeon if I recall right.


8O In my dreams! No I wasn't a surgeon, but I remember you said that once before. I actually contemplated going to med school but I don't have the leadership skills or ability to communicate clearly with people.


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dragonsanddemons
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07 Apr 2021, 8:53 am

I have no desire whatsoever to have a family (as in spouse and/or kids), so it’s an easy choice for me.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Apr 2021, 1:05 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
I earned a very high salary. Higher than most double-income families. I did it to provide a comfortable home as a single parent. My ex twaddled off and violated court orders. I liked my career, and took a lot of pride in my accomplishments, but my kids undoubtedly come first. That's why I did the job in the first place.



You are a surgeon if I recall right.


8O In my dreams! No I wasn't a surgeon, but I remember you said that once before. I actually contemplated going to med school but I don't have the leadership skills or ability to communicate clearly with people.


Maybe I thought you were a surgeon when you mentioned your salary.

I suspected you as a surgeon...or a drug dealer.



IsabellaLinton
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07 Apr 2021, 1:22 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
I earned a very high salary. Higher than most double-income families. I did it to provide a comfortable home as a single parent. My ex twaddled off and violated court orders. I liked my career, and took a lot of pride in my accomplishments, but my kids undoubtedly come first. That's why I did the job in the first place.



You are a surgeon if I recall right.


8O In my dreams! No I wasn't a surgeon, but I remember you said that once before. I actually contemplated going to med school but I don't have the leadership skills or ability to communicate clearly with people.


Maybe I thought you were a surgeon when you mentioned your salary.

I suspected you as a surgeon...or a drug dealer.


You got me. I did time in Terre Haute with Mr Nice. :twisted:


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auntblabby
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07 Apr 2021, 1:47 pm

if my life had turned out normally, i would have chosen family, as blood is thicker than the water of a career. at the end of the day, despite riches and status, being without a family seems to me a barren existence.



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08 Apr 2021, 9:31 pm

OutsideView wrote:
Fnord wrote:
You may assume that your "spouse and children" would always be happy, healthy, respectful, and trustworthy.

Definitely this for me! Although "respectful" feels a bit funny unless you mean a mutual respect that I would share with them because we love each other.


Mutual respect for someone who you love and share your time with is very difficult.. I put emphasis on love.. it's very easy to say you love someone and having the best intentions of doing so.. but fail to understand the limitations one can have on themselves thinking they're demonstrating their feelings accurately. Basically love is harder ham it seems.



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08 Apr 2021, 9:31 pm

auntblabby wrote:
if my life had turned out normally, i would have chosen family, as blood is thicker than the water of a career. at the end of the day, despite riches and status, being without a family seems to me a barren existence.


Family is everything.. I learned that the hard way.



Fnord
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09 Apr 2021, 8:47 am

Danusaurus wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
if my life had turned out normally, i would have chosen family, as blood is thicker than the water of a career. at the end of the day, despite riches and status, being without a family seems to me a barren existence.
Family is everything.. I learned that the hard way.
Family should be everything; but when family treats you worse than most strangers do, it makes the life-style of Ebeneezer Scrooge look like the better option.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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09 Apr 2021, 10:15 am

The poll is ambiguous, if one is the sole provider of a family, how are they gonna choose one over the other?



Fnord
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09 Apr 2021, 10:20 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
The poll is ambiguous, if one is the sole provider of a family, how are they gonna choose one over the other?
I was specifically addressing the two extremes, knowing full well that compromise is the ideal case.

With as much binary thinking as there is on this website, I thought it would reduce the bickering.


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nick007
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11 Apr 2021, 11:03 pm

I would def chose family but I'm disabled & am on disability & never had a successful career. The best jobs I would have any chance of possibly getting are minimum wage type stuff. I struggled majorly to get any relationship partly cuz of that & I'm a hell of a lot happier within a relationship than I was when I was employed & working 9 & half hour days not counting my hour lunch break 6 days a week in a desperate attempt to better myself & futile attempt at escaping the loneliness & despair.


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