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Fnord
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18 Aug 2021, 8:42 am

While (imho) it is not necessary to lock this thread or move/remove any of its contents, it if fair to point out that (1) the OP's questions may have been answered, and (2) the OP himself seems to have lost interest.

Maybe Offset will stop "lurking" when he sees this post, and log back in with a response ... ?


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CockneyRebel
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18 Aug 2021, 11:04 am

I've found that this entire site has seen sunnier days. I've been misgendered quite a few times on WP. There was even one member who presumed that I was intersex. I've seen quite a few transphobic posts recently as well. It's everywhere and I can't get away from it, even on WP.


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Fnord
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18 Aug 2021, 11:07 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
I've found that this entire site has seen sunnier days. I've been misgendered quite a few times on WP. There was even one member who presumed that I was intersex. I've seen quite a few transphobic posts recently as well. It's everywhere and I can't get away from it, even on WP.
Sorry about all that.  Some of us do try, but even the best of intentions often go astray...

:(


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CockneyRebel
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18 Aug 2021, 11:08 am

Fnord wrote:
CockneyRebel wrote:
I've found that this entire site has seen sunnier days. I've been misgendered quite a few times on WP. There was even one member who presumed that I was intersex. I've seen quite a few transphobic posts recently as well. It's everywhere and I can't get away from it, even on WP.
Sorry about all that.  Some of us do try, but even the best of intentions often go astray...

:(


That's okay.


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HeroOfHyrule
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21 Aug 2021, 3:47 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I've found that this entire site has seen sunnier days. I've been misgendered quite a few times on WP. There was even one member who presumed that I was intersex. I've seen quite a few transphobic posts recently as well. It's everywhere and I can't get away from it, even on WP.

I think there's "surges" of transphobic activity online, especially around elections or times of political unrest. I know this has been mentioned all over the internet, many times, but trans people seem to be the new "weird" thing for people to vilify and debate now that homosexual relationships are relatively accepted in the West. That gives me hope though that eventually we'll be met with the same level of acceptance.



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22 Aug 2021, 12:40 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
I think there's "surges" of transphobic activity online, especially around elections or times of political unrest. I know this has been mentioned all over the internet, many times, but trans people seem to be the new "weird" thing for people to vilify and debate now that homosexual relationships are relatively accepted in the West. That gives me hope though that eventually we'll be met with the same level of acceptance.


I truly wished that I could shared that sentiment of hope.. yes, cisgendered homosexuals have gained a majority of acceptance and it's not as shocking of sociacially divisive in the west, as it used to be (I don't get called fa***t as often by people randomly passing by, gawked at or threathened or beaten up like the good ole days in the 90's and 2000's), since the U.S. granted gay marriage legal.. it seems to be more "normalised" and not triggering to even bother the most outspoken of culture warriors from conservative judaeo-christian backgrounds.. shockingly they agree to disagree before attacking an assumed queer stranger with verbal or pyshical violence, aside from an occasional eyeroll or scoff (if you're publicly presenting too "queer" for their taste).. so I'm happy for that..

But I can't agree that trans people will be granted social acceptance from discrimination and violence in the west or elsewhere around the world, at least in my lifetime (the next 20 to 40 years I assume, before I kick the bucket), or perhaps the next..

Unless, there are radical changes towards federally mandated nondiscrimination statues in the U.S. on every level (before my lifetime ends and the next one ends); from discrimination on employment, housing, ridiculous bathroom rights, legal penalties against violence induced by transphobia, harassment, rape, police brutality, torture, murder; all that fun stuff, until then.. until we people of trans experience feel safe to walk outside as we feel fit, regardless of how we dress or present to the outside world to live our best lives, without the restrictions from discrimination, intimidation, assault arw put in place legally, and the consequencial political dust settles, like it did for cisgendered homosexuals..

I don't see it in my lifetime, especially with the amount growing ever so quickly amongst the far right extremists and neo-nazi resurgence happening world-wide.. until they are exterminated, there won't be the utopia for trans people to enjoy, as the cisgendered homosexuals seem to take solace within western countries today.

And the internet being the internet, there will always be places for the transphobes of all backgrounds to congregate, circle-jerk one another and cause atrocities in the real world.



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31 Aug 2021, 9:03 am

Admittedly, I'm not always sure when I should report things or not. For instance, I had a member directly message me after I posted in a thread about whether people wanted kids. In that thread, I mentioned that one day I might adopt but that it would depend on a lot of different factors in the future and that I wasn't certain.

The message told me that I should reconsider and it contained the usual rhetoric against gay people adopting. My response was a three-page long reply discussing misconceptions and pointing out the flaws in the message. Should I have reported this? Does this count as a personal attack? I am so used to justifying myself I'll admit it didn't even occur to me at the time that perhaps I shouldn't have tolerated it in the first place. The member is no longer here, but I do wonder if I should've handled it differently.

Further, I agree that the transphobia I sometimes see here is disheartening. I hope HeroOfHyrule is right, that trans rights will be met with the same acceptance in the future. Unfortunately, I have been on nights out with my friends before where I have witnessed people be openly transphobic towards my mates. I have wondered how I should better handle such situations, whether I should speak up or whether the best course of action is to simply leave.


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magz
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31 Aug 2021, 9:11 am

Lost_dragon wrote:
The message told me that I should reconsider and it contained the usual rhetoric against gay people adopting. My response was a three-page long reply discussing misconceptions and pointing out the flaws in the message. Should I have reported this?
Yes.
Lost_dragon wrote:
Does this count as a personal attack?
Maybe (can't tell without reading the actual message)
Lost_dragon wrote:
I am so used to justifying myself I'll admit it didn't even occur to me at the time that perhaps I shouldn't have tolerated it in the first place. The member is no longer here, but I do wonder if I should've handled it differently.
No need to overthink the past and dig up old conflicts with now-absent people - but in general, any PMs that make you uncomfortable can be safely reported. That gives the mod team fuller picture on what's going on under the surface. Sometimes it's very relevant.


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HeroOfHyrule
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31 Aug 2021, 2:20 pm

I don't know if I'll see trans people be "accepted" in my lifetime, and seeing the political unrest relating to us does often give me doubt that we'll be accepted anytime soon. I try to stay hopeful though because I guess if I just relent, accept the hate, and say "It won't happen," then that just contributes to the issue and lets the transphobes win.



Skjald
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01 Sep 2021, 7:13 am

What exactly is this section? I thought it was L G B T not T E R F.

I I
V

Quote:
[Removed for violating WP rules]

LOL I am pretty sure lesbiphobic isn’t an actual word and the actual term is homophobic. Then again I am not a native English speaker to start with so I might be totally wrong, hilarious nonetheless.

Being a bisexual man leaning more towards the homo isle of the two I also highly doubt that this section is regularly flooded with offensive, annoying, homophobic and misogynist trans people. I haven’t heard of many trans people being homophobic and misogynist yet and I haven’t experienced homophobia from the trans men and women I have gotten to know during the years irl and that were quite some. They weren’t dysfunctional either!

It’s a lot more likely that your ideology is incredibly hostile, toxic and transphobic and that you deem the mere existence of trans people and the discussion of trans issues in this section or anywhere else for that matter an offense, annoying, homophobic and misogynist. They could probably discuss and say whatever, talk about the weather and you’d still be mad that they dare to write or say anything at all.

Being against TERF ideology =/= homophobia.
I oppose TERF ideology as dangerous, irrational, fearmongering idiocy and I am pretty certain this is not me being homophobic.

I also always find the hypocrisy of the TERF types incredibly entertaining. In my country they cooperate and work together with the alt-right party. And while they deem the mere existence of trans people (trans women in particular) as homophobic, misogynist and threatening, they are apparently incapable of comprehending the alt-right party’s program and what those politicians say and push for and what would happen to them under the fascist reign. That the alt-right party does not merely oppose and deem transsexual people as degenerates and want to get rid of them but that they see homosexual people the very same way and want to strip them off of their rights and eventually depose them too (even though trans people and gay/bi men are first on the list and lesbians/bi women last, lesbians are still on their list regardless), is fine with them. And as far as straight women go, they ought to be mothers and housekeepers who produce and raise the Aryan offspring for the fatherland and submit to their husbands. But apparently that’s all cool with the TERFs as well as long as there are no trans people. It definitely shows that they don’t give a s**t about homosexual people and their rights or women’s rights but that their only political stand and purpose in life is to hate trans people and they’ll work together with just everyone to take the rights of trans people away. TERFs are incredibly pathetic, sad individuals! If they weren’t that reprehensible I’d feel sorry for them and their miserable personalities and lives.


Quote:
[Removed for violating WP rules] A lot of the T in the 90's and 80's were usually lesbian, gay or bisexual, so they're already part of the community. You don't have conform to gender stereotypes, and still feel comfortable with your biological sex. For example, I usually don't conform to a lot of stereotypes women are "supposed" to conform to, and I'm not even trans at all. I don't know what your dating apps are like, but with lesbians, a lot of straight couples are on there, and other things. Not the best to go on dating apps truthfully. Also, anyone that is homosexual, particularly female, they'll use the disgusting slur q***r instead of lesbian, gay, or homosexual female. A lot of q***rs are actually straight from what I've seen, and only think they're q***r because they don't conform to gender stereotypes.


Is this satire ? x’D
“All them gaystranssexuals are targeting and preying on our poor, good Christian kids turning them into gaystranssexuals with their gay trans agenda!”

One just gotta love LGBT folks who wield the same incredibly harmful arguments against trans people that religious lunatics and far right conservatives wield and wielded against all of us for centuries! The same moon logic that contributed massively to the oppression of gay men in particular!

It truly takes an absolute “genius” to do so and not even realise it! Kudos!


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Last edited by magz on 03 Sep 2021, 9:24 am, edited 1 time in total.: Quoted content violating WP rules removed

Lost_dragon
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01 Sep 2021, 10:14 am

Skjald wrote:
LOL I am pretty sure lesbiphobic isn’t an actual word and the actual term is homophobic. Then again I am not a native English speaker to start with so I might be totally wrong, hilarious nonetheless.


I've heard the term used online, but homophobia is used a lot more frequently to describe such things. Personally, if I needed to specify in a conversation for any reason, then I'd say 'homophobia directed at lesbians / gay women' or 'prejudice against lesbians' since lesbiphobia seems a bit awkward to say. The term gained some popularity as a means of discussing particular forms of prejudice that are unique to gay women. I think that there can be some differences between homophobia aimed at men VS homophobia aimed at women, but there is also a great deal of overlap which is why I think that lesbiphobia is a redundant term.

Quote:
Also, anyone that is homosexual, particularly female, they'll use the disgusting slur q***r instead of lesbian, gay, or homosexual female. A lot of q***rs are actually straight from what I've seen, and only think they're q***r because they don't conform to gender stereotypes.


I use lesbian and gay interchangeably to refer to myself. Nor do I mind homosexual, but I am unlikely to use that in a casual conversation. However, I also don't mind queer, but I understand why some people don't like it. Do I conform to gender stereotypes? Only the ones I want to. I am fairly feminine because that's how I like to be. Yet I don't wear facial make-up because I dislike how it feels on my skin, but I like nail polish because it doesn't bother me when it is on my nails. I just do whatever feels right on the day whenever I can.


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magz
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01 Sep 2021, 11:47 am

Skjald wrote:
What exactly is this section? I thought it was L G B T not T E R F.

I I
V
Quote:
[Removed for violating WP rules]

LOL I am pretty sure lesbiphobic isn’t an actual word and the actual term is homophobic. Then again I am not a native English speaker to start with so I might be totally wrong, hilarious nonetheless.

Being a bisexual man leaning more towards the homo isle of the two I also highly doubt that this section is regularly flooded with offensive, annoying, homophobic and misogynist trans people. I haven’t heard of many trans people being homophobic and misogynist yet and I haven’t experienced homophobia from the trans men and women I have gotten to know during the years irl and that were quite some. They weren’t dysfunctional either!

It’s a lot more likely that your ideology is incredibly hostile, toxic and transphobic and that you deem the mere existence of trans people and the discussion of trans issues in this section or anywhere else for that matter an offense, annoying, homophobic and misogynist. They could probably discuss and say whatever, talk about the weather and you’d still be mad that they dare to write or say anything at all.

Being against TERF ideology =/= homophobia.
I oppose TERF ideology as dangerous, irrational, fearmongering idiocy and I am pretty certain this is not me being homophobic.

I also always find the hypocrisy of the TERF types incredibly entertaining. In my country they cooperate and work together with the alt-right party. And while they deem the mere existence of trans people (trans women in particular) as homophobic, misogynist and threatening, they are apparently incapable of comprehending the alt-right party’s program and what those politicians say and push for and what would happen to them under the fascist reign. That the alt-right party does not merely oppose and deem transsexual people as degenerates and want to get rid of them but that they see homosexual people the very same way and want to strip them off of their rights and eventually depose them too (even though trans people and gay/bi men are first on the list and lesbians/bi women last, lesbians are still on their list regardless), is fine with them. And as far as straight women go, they ought to be mothers and housekeepers who produce and raise the Aryan offspring for the fatherland and submit to their husbands. But apparently that’s all cool with the TERFs as well as long as there are no trans people. It definitely shows that they don’t give a s**t about homosexual people and their rights or women’s rights but that their only political stand and purpose in life is to hate trans people and they’ll work together with just everyone to take the rights of trans people away. TERFs are incredibly pathetic, sad individuals! If they weren’t that reprehensible I’d feel sorry for them and their miserable personalities and lives.


Quote:
[Removed for violating WP rules] A lot of the T in the 90's and 80's were usually lesbian, gay or bisexual, so they're already part of the community. You don't have conform to gender stereotypes, and still feel comfortable with your biological sex. For example, I usually don't conform to a lot of stereotypes women are "supposed" to conform to, and I'm not even trans at all. I don't know what your dating apps are like, but with lesbians, a lot of straight couples are on there, and other things. Not the best to go on dating apps truthfully. Also, anyone that is homosexual, particularly female, they'll use the disgusting slur q***r instead of lesbian, gay, or homosexual female. A lot of q***rs are actually straight from what I've seen, and only think they're q***r because they don't conform to gender stereotypes.


Is this satire ? x’D
“All them gaystranssexuals are targeting and preying on our poor, good Christian kids turning them into gaystranssexuals with their gay trans agenda!”

One just gotta love LGBT folks who wield the same incredibly harmful arguments against trans people that religious lunatics and far right conservatives wield and wielded against all of us for centuries! The same moon logic that contributed massively to the oppression of gay men in particular!

It truly takes an absolute “genius” to do so and not even realise it! Kudos!

Please, report these posts in their original locations.


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Last edited by magz on 03 Sep 2021, 9:25 am, edited 1 time in total.: Quoted content violating WP rules removed

Skjald
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01 Sep 2021, 3:53 pm

Lost_dragon wrote:
I think that there can be some differences between homophobia aimed at men VS homophobia aimed at women, but there is also a great deal of overlap which is why I think that lesbiphobia is a redundant term.


Yeah, that’s well said, I agree.


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03 Sep 2021, 5:51 am

Fnord wrote:
While (imho) it is not necessary to lock this thread or move/remove any of its contents, it if fair to point out that (1) the OP's questions may have been answered, and (2) the OP himself seems to have lost interest.

Maybe Offset will stop "lurking" when he sees this post, and log back in with a response ... ?


Incorrect. I have always been here. Albeit lurking, but I didn't go anywhere. lol. I just was concerned about the lack of activity in the LGBTQ Austim section, and your sentiment of "OP has moved on, doesn't hang around here anymore." Is actually proving my point if you think about it. smh. lol. Alas.

I meant that in the nicest way, just to mention. That's all.



magz
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03 Sep 2021, 6:12 am

Thank you for reporting the posts.
I hope the content have been removed without too much disruption to the topic - it's highly discussed, after all.

If sweeping attacks like that are done again, please, report immediately. Dealing with old posts (i.e. posts with many responses) is a lot harder than with fresh ones.


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08 Jan 2022, 3:34 am

The fact an unrelated meme/troll post got famous overnight in this section. Wow smh.

I'm really wearing thin with this damn site. I feel being a black gay autistic man, is a curse I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. I swear smh. Can't relate to anybody.