My boyfriend got a job and i have a few worries

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Hizi
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19 Apr 2021, 2:19 pm

Hello, my first post here :)
My AS boyfriend had been unemployed since he graduated from uni around 2 years ago. And he finally got a job offer in London. I am really happy for him since I know it has been stressful for him not being able to get a job. At the same time, I am very worried about him and his job:-
1. He dislike big city and he prefer living in smaller town. It would be hard for him to cope with new environment.
2. He is used to waking up late and gaming all day. Having a job would have positive impact on fixing his schedule and lifestyle, but I imagine it would be tough to get used to all the changes all in a sudden.
2. The job that he's got is Brand Ambassador. I am not sure if this is a suitable role for him since the role would involve loads of talking and rejections, which could be difficult for autistic individuals.
3. The job is 100% commission, he has to make sales via phone, otherwise no income.
The rent in London is also super expensive. It would be very stressful and risky as there is no base salary.
4. I did some research on the company. There are mixed reviews about it. All employees are 'self-employed" and they help promote certain product/service from certain brand. The company provides free training to the employee on how to promote the product and to be "positive". The job involves loads of hard work. Most people found it "rewarding" yet "stressful". Like some people managed to earn a lot,whereas some others barely earned anything and ended up quitting the job in a few weeks. This job sounds like a scam but it's apparently legal.

I know it means a lot for my boyfriend to get a job finally, and I am happy for him. I just have the nature of worrying about many things. I am a neurotypical myself and I want to offer my best support for him.
We have been dating for more than 8 months, and we did long distance for 6 months. Now that he is moving further away (approx 2 hours journey). I am gonna miss him a lot and I wish to be by his side to get through all these.



Fnord
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19 Apr 2021, 4:18 pm

If he cannot have the job he loves, then he should love the job he has.

Or would he rather go back to unemployment?


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cornerpiece
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20 Apr 2021, 8:12 pm

Sadly you are right, it sounds like a job that a lot of us would hate, I would certainly hate it and I would be bad at it too.

There is a possibility that he could assume the role of a brand ambassador with full attention of an AS person and become good at it.
There is also a possibility that this experience could help him learn useful coping strategies and skills. Say, communication, empathy, dealing with rejection, etc.

So not all is bad and there is hope. But I would try to minimize the risk of renting in London and ending up in minus financially... If it's a calling job, it should be possible to work from home..?

Personally, I am a little bit worried for you too. You care a lot for a person whom you know not so long, and who (probably) hasnt so far shown that he can take care of you in return. Apologies if my assumption here is wrong... Just watch your own money, let him take his risks at his own expense.



Hizi
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22 Apr 2021, 6:20 am

cornerpiece wrote:
Sadly you are right, it sounds like a job that a lot of us would hate, I would certainly hate it and I would be bad at it too.

There is a possibility that he could assume the role of a brand ambassador with full attention of an AS person and become good at it.
There is also a possibility that this experience could help him learn useful coping strategies and skills. Say, communication, empathy, dealing with rejection, etc.

So not all is bad and there is hope. But I would try to minimize the risk of renting in London and ending up in minus financially... If it's a calling job, it should be possible to work from home..?

Personally, I am a little bit worried for you too. You care a lot for a person whom you know not so long, and who (probably) hasnt so far shown that he can take care of you in return. Apologies if my assumption here is wrong... Just watch your own money, let him take his risks at his own expense.


Thank you for your comment!

Yes, regardless of whether he is going to succeed in this job,it would certainly be an important experience for him to learn and develop his skills.

Looks like working from home is not possible unfortunately. He told me that he booked a room at a hotel on his first week. I also suggested that he could rent a place for short stay initially just so he could back off in case anything goes wrong.

It would be a tough and risky journey for him but I know he is happy about getting this job. Right now, I cannot do much but to support him.

And thanks for worrying about me, I am not going to offer him financial support and I know he wouldn't want it as well. He is going to risk his own expense. I just have to believe in him.

If this job doesn't do any good in the end, I will persuade him to look for other jobs for sure!



cornerpiece
Blue Jay
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31 May 2021, 6:54 pm

So how did it go?



Hizi
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23 Jun 2021, 11:10 pm

cornerpiece wrote:
So how did it go?


Thank you for checking on this post!
Sorry for the late reply, I don't really check the forum...
My boyfriend spent 2 weeks in London for that job and he quitted. The company that he worked for was probably a scam. They got him to walk 10 hours a day, knock on people's door and ask them to donate to charity. I don't even know why this type of door to door sales is legal in this country... He only got paid for comission based on what he sold. My boyfriend actually tried very hard and made sales in the end. However, London was way too expensive. He realised that he was just losing money. He also had flat feet, walking all day just hurted him a lot.

I felt so relieved that he quitted that job. At the moment, he has been slowly searching for other jobs. I also need a job since my temporary job contract ended a few weeks ago. Now that we are on the same boat, I hope that I can motivate him on job searching.

Finding a job during Covid is difficult for me as a NT. And it's even more difficult for him since not many recruiters understand autism well enough... I learnt that there are recruiters such as JP Morgan and SAP which provide paid internship for talented young people with autism. Perhaps that's something worth looking at? (Would be grateful if anyone can share their experience working for them)



kraftiekortie
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08 Jul 2021, 10:28 pm

Make sure he gets a salary next time.

What did he get his degree in?



Hizi
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09 Jul 2021, 6:47 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Make sure he gets a salary next time.

What did he get his degree in?


Ye...
He's got a Bachelor degree in Mathematics.



cornerpiece
Blue Jay
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11 Jul 2021, 7:10 pm

Hizi wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
Make sure he gets a salary next time.

What did he get his degree in?


Ye...
He's got a Bachelor degree in Mathematics.

I know a lot of mathematicians who work as programmers. Work from home, good pay.



RetroGamer87
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16 Jul 2021, 11:42 am

Brand ambassador is a thing? What kind of makework job is that?


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Mountain Goat
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16 Jul 2021, 5:47 pm

Is it a charity for blind people?


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