"I am just really thirsty."
Earlier today, I was waiting for the bus outside of a gas station which is just in front of the bus stop when two men walked out of the gas station. While one of them walked to his car, the other got into his car right in front of the entrance.
The man parked at the front entrance started talking to me. "What's going on?" I politely said, "I am just really thirsty," by drinking a bottle of water which shut him down and close his car door. He also said, "Although I do like your hair color," and drove off, which I know is a polite way of saying, "I don't like you."
Any thoughts on the way I handled him?
Bea,
Yes, I was brushing him off by being as polite as I could while letting him know I was not interested. That said, I didn't really mean to give him the idea that I didn't like him. I just was not comfortable with some random stranger sitting in his car flirting with me. As for him not liking me, I was trying to pay attention to the unwritten social rules of interactions. When I interacted with him, I attempted to use more of a closed body language as well
However, I am trying to learn how to brush people off in witty ways without being mean or nasty.
Summer_Twilight, you did nothing wrong. Since you mentioned a "bus stop", I'm sure you were in a big city, not a small town or a suburb. City people tend to be terse and brusque; they have thick skins, and see such speaking styles as an expected norm. There's outward decency, like not cursing someone out undeservedly, but that's about it. For instance, if homeless people ask me for spare change, I blurt out "I got nothing" without slowing down. Your reaction is far from rude, and the only person to call it such would be someone looking for a confrontation. That man tried to flirt with you, you told him you were thirsty, he didn't get the reaction he expected or wanted, and left you.
This speaking style may not be "nice", but I'm used to it. It feels strangely honest. I prefer it over "bless your heart!", where you have to rack your brain whether it's true and literal, or a dog whistle for "oh my god, you're such a loser".
1. Bea - I used to have more trouble with nuances and other hints but I have gotten pretty good at picking them up.
2. Aspie1 - When I said "I am just really thirsty," I said it in a very friendly manner.
Another example, there was another time where I was getting off the bus when this man approached me while carrying a bible. He comes up to me and goes "Excuse me, I can't help but notice you're very beautiful." I asked him, "Did you just come from church," it was Sunday. He goes, "Oh just forget the whole thing and took off pretty fast.