I feel super drained today

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I had a draining day. I had an appointment. I went for a few walks.

My appointment went weird. I didnt know how to answer some of the questions. They were about my symptoms in the past few weeks. It felt scary to answer them. I dont want to go to the hospital for it.

I answered honestly. They say my levels of paranoia have gone up.

The more paranoid one feels the harder it is to trust that it's safe to answer honestly.

I hope you're okay and have plenty of time to recharge. Would a hug help?

Thank you. A hug would help.

You're welcome. It can be hard to ask for help when all of your coping mechanisms are setup to conceal the need for help and withdraw from situations where a vulnerability might be exploited. I know I feel drained when I have to bypass those things which tends to discourage me from pursuing help.

I've got some appointments coming up this week that I'm not looking forward to, but not until Monday at least.