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Champagne supernova
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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07 May 2021, 5:55 am

Hello. Does anyone else feel like they are being controlled by friends etc?
I didn't feel like it at the time, but now looking back to when I was younger it does seem like friends and romantic interests were trying to control me. I would be at a party and these girls who were my friends wouldn't let other girls talk to me.
My so called friends would say oh why are you talking to her?
And weirdest of all I chatted and flirted with other girls and they were like oh no I couldn't do it to so and so, the girl who was controlling of me.



shortfatbalduglyman
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07 May 2021, 8:35 am

Yesterday a "friend" emailed me to tell me that driving my deformed defective skeleton weekly, 16 miles roundtrip, light traffic made her feel "used" and she won't drive me anymore

So I emailed back that I wasn't trying to "use" her but it is her decision who to drive , and I don't bribery or extortion precious lil "people"



cbd
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07 May 2021, 8:52 am

Jealousy



Fnord
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07 May 2021, 9:01 am

"Choose your friends wisely, and also choose friends that you can trust." -- Saks' Rule (Elyn Saks, 1956-present)

"Use your friends wisely, and also use only those friends whom you can trust to be useful." -- Fnord's Corollary (Fnord, 1957-present)


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ToughDiamond
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07 May 2021, 1:42 pm

I never had that trouble much, though I always tended to get serious with the opposite sex pretty quickly, and being rather a staunch monogamist I more or less took it as read that if I had a girlfriend then I wasn't supposed to flirt with others, so I didn't. I suppose it's fair enough if no claims have been agreed, but as soon as I got interested in one girl then she'd be the one I was talking to and any others quickly paled into insignificance until such time as it was clear that it wasn't going to work with the current one. Otherwise things would get complicated.

I'm not saying it's the best way, just that it's the way that came most natural to me. When it comes to who you can flirt with and who you can't, I guess the only useful rule is that whatever freedom one person exercises, it's OK for the other person to do the same. Personally I don't object to jealousy in people as long as it's not excessive and doesn't turn nasty.



Champagne supernova
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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Joined: 3 May 2021
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Location: North West England

13 May 2021, 2:34 am

She wasn't a proper girlfriend, and she was still talking to other guys. I didn't go out of my way to talk to other girls, they were the ones chatting to me.



ToughDiamond
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13 May 2021, 2:46 am

^
Well, if no claims had been staked and they talked to others, I'd say it was unfair of them to expect you not to do as you pleased just like they did, obviously.



Champagne supernova
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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Joined: 3 May 2021
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Posts: 63
Location: North West England

13 May 2021, 3:29 am

Yeah that's what I thought. I think she was playing games trying to make me jealous, but when other girls talked to me she was the one who got jealous. I hate all these silly games. I asked her if she'd wanna go to other places but oh no she'll only meet me when she's drunk in a pub or bar, very weird.